Shade Wield/Goin to the show
From Unofficial Handbook of the Virtue Universe
Contents |
Chapter 0
He woke up with a dry mouth, a pounding headache, and eyes that didn't seem to want to open.
All in all, a normal sunday morning, was the first thought in Shade Wield's head.
What wasn't normal was the sight that greeted him when his eyes finally did open. A dark room that seemed to be made of steel plate, but the feeling beneath his back (resting against the ground as it was) seemed to be warm and gently pulsating. Harsh lights shone down from the roof above bathing him in brightness but leaving nearly everything else in the room in barely pierced darkness. He was not alone surrounded by this light, though, there were over a dozen other beams of light shinning from above onto the rooms floor, and in each of those rested bizarre creatures of every shape and description. Their actions ranged from viciously clawing at the edges of the light, but seeming unable to move, stock still as if asleep, or restlessly pacing around the small space within the light beam. It was only then Shade took note of the cacophony of shrieks, squeels, grunts, groans, roars and twitters of the beings, though they sounded muted. He had only a few seconds to take all this in, as without warning an image projected itself in front of him, on it a grey faced being with a pronounced snout, sunken cheeks and no obvious mouth. No other being around the 'zoo' reacted to its presence. When it 'spoke' it showed no sign of any movement in the 'mouth' region, and it's mechanical tone suggested a synthesized voice.
"Greetings, Sol denizen designation one. You have been chosen because our transports sensors detected vast amounts of power within your being, and have decided you will be an ideal candidate for our Gladiatorial combat."
The screen shifted, showing two creatures - one a mass of lashing spines and teeth, the other a brute of enormous muscular stature and claws extending out of every joint - ripping into each other while the surrounding arena seemed full of the grey 'no mouthed' beings watching impassively.
"You are not forced to fight. Indeed, our customers are quite willing to watch a being brutally torn apart. As an incentive, we wish to inform you that our fleets consist of thousands of warships that will bombard your planet from orbit, scouring it of any life, should you be defeated."
The screen again shifted to the no-mouthed being, flaps extending from the sides of it's cranium as it continued 'speaking'.
"Rest assured, you will have no need of your particular species brands of nourishment while on our life-ship, and your eventual death will contribute to the enjoyment of millions of our species."
The screen winked out, leaving Shade will two thoughts. Firstly, how the hell did they screw their scanners up so much that they detected 'vast amounts of power' in him. Secondly... [censored].
Chapter 1
"So you're telling me that if I don't fight, they're going to position an enormous invasion fleet - cloaked from sight over - my home planet and bomb it from orbit... But if I do fight - and lose - they're going to position an enormous invasion fleet - cloaked from sight - over my home planet and bomb it from orbit. But if I DO fight, and I DO somehow manage to win against that enormous tusked beast I saw in the other cells, instead they're just going to launch a massive land invasion against my home planet to try and take us all prisoner?" The grey faced creature nodded in a manner that seemed absent-minded, but already Shade had learnt their body language was completely different to humans. He imagined he could have heard annoyance in it's entirely synthesized voice. "Yes yes, we've been over this. Now, Sol Designation 1, we need to get these procedures done. We want you in top shape for the combats." The creature took a few steps back from the light beam shining around him, the entire rest of the room covered in darkness (although the lack of snarling suggested Shade had been transported to a different room while he slept). Before the alien suddenly 'flashed in' to existence a large banquet table, covered in a wide vairety of foods. Unfortunately for Shade's grumbling stomach, most of them seemed to be either squirming and alive, sizzling and melting through the plate it was on, or unpalatable in some manner. "Do any of these meals look appetising to you?" "No more then the last table, or the table before that, or the eighteen table before that... I don't understand why you can't just zap some god damnned take-away food for me off Earth... or 'Sol sub-world 3', as you call it." The Grey skinned Alien smoothed out the enormous robes over it's shoulders (which for some reason stopped at the waist, but seeing as the biped didn't seem to have reproductive organs in that region, Shade was unconcerned) in what he had learnt was a sign of irritation. "We are currently the travel of light over a year times nineteen thousand distant from your pitiful rock, can you not feel the intersteller forces outside the ship?" Shade paused.
And waited.
And waited.
"Nope. The ground feels as solid as rock to me." The creature again smoothed out its shoulder-robes and let the synthesizer express its thoughts. "You are among one thousand, five hundred species from all corners of the universe participating in our combats, and the level of energies of unknown type we've detected coming off you puts you as placed among the top ten finalists, our predictors have decided." "Energies...?" Shade reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose before continuing. "Look, mate, I don't know what your scanners are looking for, but on my planet I am nowhere NEAR the most powerful. There're a huge number of REALLY powerful beings there." The grey skinned creature waved a hand and the feast table vanished, replaced with a large 'ray-gun' looking device standing up on a tripod, which the creatured aimed at Shade. He took several steps back, until the edge of the light beam from the roof above prevented him moving further. The creature pressed a button, and a screen folded out. "According to our sensors, you have a 'power level' - our designation for an individuals energy containment - of over... nine thousand. That should at least make you noteworthy in battle. Although the ravenous Bugblatter beast of Trall had a 'power level' in excess of twenty thousand, and it was knocked out in the first round last cycle." All Shade could do was rest his hands over his face and shake his head. "I can't believe you said all that seriously?" The creature turned to face Shade around the 'ray gun/examination machine'. "I don't follow your meaning. Although these vocal translators aren't very effective. Either way, your first match begins within ten small-time-scales." Shade just blinked, and glanced around for a second, then back at the creature. "How long is a small time sc-" his words were interupted as a bright beam of light gripped him tightly and transported him elsewhere.
Over twenty feet tall.
Four 'forelimbs' that consisted of enormous scythe-like blades.
A three-jawed mouth rowed with razor sharp teeth.
Bipedal figure with reverse-joined legs.
"Oh crap" was all Shade could say as he looked up at the beast rapidly closing with him, one hundred meters out and getting closer by the second. His eyes were drawn upwards to dozens of floating saucer shaped ships overhead, see-through flooring showing each contained tens of thousands of the grey-skinned species watching the procedings. Shade glanced down again at the scale-skinned beast snarling and roaring as it galloped towards him, before taking in the rocky terrain.
"Well. This isn't fun."
Chapter 3
The first sycthed limb passed under his backflip. The second avoided by a sidestep to the left. The third and fourth were ducked under as they passed through where his head had been mere moments before. It was only when the enormous creature continued it's charged through him Shade was thrown thirdy feet back, it's 'shoulder' impacting with his chest and flinging him away. He landed heavily on his back, before rolling to the side to avoid a pair of bladed limbs crashing through the ground beneath where his stomach had been resting, and launched himself to his feet. He could vaguely hear the cheers and cries of the audience above in their hovering ships over the snarling of the beast in front of him. He took his eyes off the monster for a brief moment to take in the surrounding environment, taking in the rock pillars jutting out of the ground. That brief moment was all the creature needed, sweeping all four of its limbs out in a wide pattern, catching him on the back, blunt end of one of its limbs and flinging him further away, to land heavily on his back resting against one of the pillars.
... Ouch.
He shook his head a few times to clear it, before turning back to watch the beast closing with him at rapid speed. Shade leapt to his feet and - deciding discretion was the better part of valor - began fleeing in the best way he could. He turned and began leaping from rock to rock along the pillar, climbing the distance to the top and hoping that the creature couldn't follow him. It's galloping paces brought it to the rock column sooner then he'd have liked, before the scything limbs lanced out, digging into the rock face mere feet behind him as he leap from platform to platform. He didn't notice after a few leaps the rock being a little less solid then before, nor did he notice the creature's stab drawing blood from it. What he did notice was when he landed upon a platform out of the monsters reach, when a pair of strange patterns on the rockface opened up into eyes, an arm-like limb reaching up and flicking him away.
I am getting SICK of being thrown around like an old toy.
He landed - once more - with a grunt of pain upon his back and groaned as he turned to face the pillar-turned-living-rock-monster as it itself twisted to face the enraged multi-limbed being. The pillar-rock-monster slowly dug itself out of it's camoflaged environment and let out a deep roar of anger, which was in turn met with a high pitched shrill from the multi-limbed beast. The two titanic beings charged, meeting one another with a bone-crunching impact. Bladed limps sliced into surprisingly cutt-able rockface, while enormous three-digit fists shattered armoured carapace. Roars of anger replaced cries of pain, while shrieks were in turn replaced with squeels. Shade could only watch as the final blow landed, a rock-fisted backhander crossed the six-limbed beasts face, his head twisting with the impact and letting out the sudden 'snap' of a broken spine, before slumping to the ground in a broken heap of what had once been a fearsome monster. The rock beast turned to face Shade where he lay and slowly approached, one of it's arms shorn off at shoulder and laying (bleeding a surprising amount for rock) where it fell. Shade just closed his eyes and waiting for the falling fist of the beast to crush him.
Instead of agonising pain followed by nothing, he felt a warm similar to the light that had teleported him to the planet's surface in the first place. He only mustered the courage to open his eyes when a familiar synthesized voice spoke up. "An unusual technique, but effective. The Rock-beast killed your foe, and you advance to the next round." Shade slowly - with a wince and grunt of pain appropriate for a man who'd been hurled around like a child's toy - stood up and faced the grey skinned alien. "So what now?" "Now, you'll be teleported back to your normal holding cell." Before more words could be said, that now-familiar bright light overtook Shade's view, and he was once more returned to the enormous darkened room, the grunts, groans, roars and snarls of an entire zoo of beast filling his ears. He reached up and covered the sides of his head, trying to block out the noise. "For gods sake, shut up!" "They cannot understand you," spoke a broad, accentless voice behind him. Shade turned to take in a seven foot tall black skinned humanoid in the cell near him, it's violet eyes fixed on him. "You speak english?" The creature paused for a moment, seeming to be considering its words before speaking. "I pick the words out of your mind that I need, before I speak. I cannot read your thoughts, only access knowledge that is at the forefront of your mind, such as language when you need to speak." Shade frowned for a few moments, before speaking up. "So... I don't suppose you've got a way out of here, do you?"
Chapter 4
A warm hearty laughter broke from the dark skinned creatures lips as it leaned forward against the edges of the beam of light.
"Would I be here, if I did?" When it (he? It looked vaguely similar to a human male) spoke it took strange pauses in between words, searching for what was appropriate.
"Touche. So, what'd they get you for? Jaywalking?" Again, the creature laughed warmly.
"They 'got' me because I was the high priest of my species, who are already capable of manipulation of the... soul. Well, that is amusing. Your species covers so many heavy meanings and concepts behind such a simple, short word. Well, I am the most powerful of my species, so they took me. And yourself?" Shade just began pacing around his 'light-cell' in vain hope that he would somehow come across a weak spot in the... beam of solid light.
"I was one of many - and not a particularly powerful one - super-people on my planet. We went around and either fought crime, or caused crime." The creature's brows... seperated? One went left, the other went right, until they rested on the sides of his eye sockets. Shade had NO idea what that particular piece of body language meant.
"But you ARE highly powerful. Even through the 'soul'-orientated beams, I can sense that." The creature paused, resting a four fingered hand against the light-beam wall.
"If I could but touch some of your essence, my friend, I could tell why it is you believe you are not powerful, when it radiates off you." Now, it was Shade's turn to grin behind his mask. He then paused for a moment, wonderful why the Aliens that took him had dressed him up in his suit first, but he quickly dismissed it before kneeling down, resting his fingers on the ground as close to the edge of the cage as he could.
"I think, I can do that." Tendrils of Shadow crept out from beneath his hand, stretching out along the ground. They withered under the light's harsh gaze until Shade held his other hand up to cover them somewhat, letting them continue out into the darkness between each light-cage, where they flourished. He looked up as they effortlessly passed the distance between the two cages and had to stifle a laugh as, for some reason, the other creatures eyebrows had snuck all the way around to his cheeks. The creature knelt down as well and rested his own hand against the ground, receiving the shadow-tendril as it crept into his palm, creating a link between the two.
Blackness. Shade's view was replaced entirely with darkness, the other lights no longer there, not even any sound existing, there was just nothingness. Then there was the laughter from before, of the creature, but this time tainted with something else. It seemed crueler, more triumphant.
"You are an easy man to fool, my 'friend'." The creature suddenly appeared before him, stretching up to a building in height, it's violet eyes fixed upon him.
"Far too easy. At least now there will be one less set of competition." The creature lifted it's hand, which slowly shifted from a normal (for an Alien) limb, into an enormous bladed appendage, before slicing across at where Shade 'floated', before the black-clad human 'leapt' up (despite not standing on any floor) over the limb. The alien again laughed.
"You have a... 'quick' mind, but we are in the land of your soul, and in here," the creature's free hand lashed out faster then the eye could see, gripping tightly and squeezing Shade, "I am the Queen." Even in the painful potentially death-bringing grip Shade had to laugh at that statement of the alien's gender, bringing to mind as it did the idea of the creature dressed in a bikini, rather then the loose robes it had on. Suddenly, it was so, the tall and dignified (apparently female) creature's robes vanished, replaced with a pink bikini. 'She' let out a deep shout of surprise, 'dropping' Shade and taking a step back, before looking up at him. The creature's eyes narrowed and her eyebrows twisted around to the side of her eyesockets.
"Your mind IS quick. But no matter." The creature's limb shifted back into a normal arm as she clapped her hands together, a blinding white light gathering between its fingers.
"Goodbye, competitor. I will NOT let my planet be destroyed," she extended her hand towards Shade, the beam of light lancing out towards him, "it had all my favourite things on it."
Chapter 6
The beam of light impacted with a shield of blackness drawn from the shadow surrounding the two being's mental presences. The light and the darkness competed, each using their raw power to engage in their battle. The light drew from the mind of the creature in front of Shade, while Shade himself didn't do anything, the surrounding blackness of his own soul battled in his place, seeming to gather limitless power from somewhere.
"This cannot be!" intoned the Mind 'Queen' in a deep tone as the blackness of the shield slowly pushed her light back into her hand, the kickback of it sending her flying back through the darkness of their surroundings, seeming to hit an invisible wall and being stuck there.
"No! I am never defeated within the arena of the spirit!" Shade slowly straightened up and grinned, watching as the Mind Queen was slowly drawn further into the wall of... wherever it was they were.
"Never say never." And then, the last outstretched arm of the creature was sucked through the wall, and vanished.
Shade's eyes flicked open, staring up at bright light that created his cell for a brief second before tilting his eyes away from the painful view. In doing so, his eyes came to rest on the cell next to his, and its inhabitant, the dark skinned, violet eyed alien being. At first he thought it was glaring at him, then he saw that its eyes were, in fact, squeezed shut as if in agony. The creature let out a single, agonising squeel aimed at the heavens (or as close as one can get, being in a space ship) before its eyes burnt out, smoke sizzling from what was left of the sockets, and it collapsed onto the floor. Blue lights flooded the 'Arena Zoo' and the sounds of creatures panicking could be heard as doors opened on numerous sides of the blackened room, bright light shining inwards from them, only to be eclipsed by enormous shadows marching into the room with an ominous pounding of metallic material upon rock-like substance. Slowly the twenty foot tall silhouette's revealed themselves as they began to march among the lights of the cells, white metal gleaming under the harsh lights. Large numbers of them came to rest at certain points around the Zoo, vaguely humanoid heads turning from side to side, scanning the beings of the room. However, a good half dozen of them came to stand surrounding Shade and the dead Mind Queen's cells, the lights that surrounded them both flickering away. A dozen arms stretched out, the limbs either grasping enormous gun-like weapons in broad three-fingered claws, or ending in guns themselves, all of which were pointed in Shade's direction.
"... Take me to your leader?" he asked, a slightly cautious tone to his voice.
Chapter 7
Shade was uncomfortable. He wasn't uncomfortable because of the fact he was restrainted by some strange solid electrical bands that left everywhere they touched numb (although that did somewhat contribute). Nor was he uncomfortable because he had two twenty feet tall humanoid death-machines standing behind him, cannons as large as his legs aimed at him (although that too contributed). He wasn't even uncomfortable because he was being forced to kneel before a ten foot throne resting upon a fifteen foot high set of stairs, upon which sat one of the grey haired aliens that were his captors, although this one seemed to have thick white hairs growing from his cheeks, and enormous shoulderpads encrusted with jewels resting over his shoulder-robes (although once more, that helped). It primarily came down the already decomposing and starting to smell body of the mind-queen resting just in front of his feet. A hand rested on Shade's shoulder, causing the earthling to glance up at the Grey-skinned being. Although he had a hard time telling one of them from another, the clothing looked similar to the one that had initially told him all the rules, before hurling him into combat with a giant behemoth. The creature's synthesized tone began speaking.
"Because the King is holy, he may not use the voice synthesizers, thusly I will translate his divine mandate for you." The grey skinned alien looked up at the 'King' and paused. No sounds could be heard in the room for a good twenty seconds before the translator once more turned to Shade.
"The King enjoyed your battle against the giant beast of Omicron Persei seven." Shade frowned.
"That's all he said in that time?" A large spear-like-weapon's back end lashed out, smacking into the back of Shade's head and knocking him forward onto the ground (landing with his head mere inches from the dead body). The translator pulled him back up to his knees.
"Please, be quiet. None but those with permission may speak before the king. It takes a long time to speak in our olfactory language." Shade blinked a few times at that.
They speak through smells? This is getting more and more Star Trek every day...
"The Glorious king," began the translator, "has allowed you to live, despite violating our rules by brutally killing the Mental Masters of Blake seven when there were no observers. Although as punishment, you will be made to fight another opponent before the first round of our battle is done." Before Shade could (unwisely) open his mouth to protest, again there was the sudden flash he now knew as the teleporter.
His eyes slowly came back into function again after the flash, taking in the enormous trees around him, and even more surprising was the feel of the platform he was standing on actually seeming to curve. He glanced down to see that he was in fact standing on a foot wide branch of one of the trees., which seemed to stretch further then the eye could see downwards, and the peaks of the trees barely within sight above. Before he could take any of this in further, his attention was claimed by a bright flash nearby, centering on another branch a mere ten feet away. When it subsided, in its place stood a five foot tall humanoid creature with bird-claw like feet that seemed at ease gripping onto the branch, and arms with four normal digits, a fifth being replaced by a foot long slashing spike. The creature turned to face Shade, revealing it's beak like nose and chin centered around a small mouth, before it crouched into a fighting stance, letting out a shrill bird-like shriek.
"I'm really gonna have to lead a gladiatorial uprising sometime soonish..." The bird like creature leapt at him, it's powerful reverse-jointed legs easily allowing it to clear the distance, blades thrust forward. Shade himself leapt upwards and flipping backwards, catching the branch he had been standing on and allowing it to carry him around in an acrobatic spin, curling back upwards once more and bringing his feet into contact with the creature's stomach. Put off course by the kick, the bird-man continued its unplanned flight through the air, before managing to catch itself barely upon another branch. The moss of this new branch seemed to conspire against the creature, causing it so slowly but surely lose its footing. Even from where he once more stood, Shade could see the panic in the creatures eyes.
"... If this backfires on me, I'm not gonna be happy." Shade leapt over to the new branch, nearly slipping himself because of the moss, but barely managing to retain his balance, before kneeling down and gripping the bird-man's wrists, slowly pulling it up onto the branch.
"You owe me, mate," said the earthling, before slowly straightening up. The Bird-man stood as well, seeming to peer curiously at Shade. It moved quickly, one of its blade-fingers stabbing out and impaling Shade through the chest.
Chapter 8
Shade's eyes locked on the five inches of spike sticking out of his chest, his mind in shock taking it in. Later on when asked, he would have no idea how he did what he did, believing it to be merely instinct. His hands reached up and snapped the spike off at the knuckle, eliciting an inhuman shriek of pain from the creature, which was only intensified when the spike was yanked out of Shade's chest and impaled in the creature's own. It passed through it's chest and ribs with ease (obviously a weaker bone structure), causing the bird-man to stumble back a few paces on the branch, having to turn sideways and grip with it's claw-feet to retain its balance. In that time Shade stepped forward and lashed out with a foot, smacking into its beak-like features, the chin and nose appendages snapped under the impact and sending it flying back. The creature barely managed to get it's hands latched onto a nearby branch before plummeting the immeasurably distance below.
"I would have saved you normally. But you've shown how stupid a gesture that is." Shade's fist clenched for a few seconds, shadow gathering in his palm, before being hurled out at his foe, the chilly negative energy lancing through it's wrist, causing it to lose it's grip with its un-maimed hand and fall down... Down... Down... Until it could be seen no more. Then, and only then, did Shade allow himself to collapse onto his knees, barely able to keep his own balance.
"C'mon... teleport... teleport... tele-" Just as his balance began to falter, he saw the now familiar brightness materialise around his form.
He awoke, not knowing how long since he'd been in those building-like trees, or even if any time had passed at all. All he knew is he no longer felt the blinding pain in his chest. The roof light shone down on his prone form, causing him to lift a hand to cover his eyes. He heard that now familiar synthesized tone. "Mercy is inappropriate in these conditions." "It's what I do. I'm a do-gooder, not a warrior." There was a few moments of silence, before the Grey-skinned alien just out of view responded.
"I do not understand your meaning."
"I do not fight wars. I fight to protect others who cannot protect themselves."
"There is... profit in this?"
"Not really, none other then emotional." The Synthesized voice ceased, and Shade slowly sat up, turning around to see the Alien was no longer present. All he could do was lay back on the ground, tilt onto his side and let his hood shield his eyes from the harsh light, trying to get some sleep.
He awoke to a harsh light, which took him a few seconds to recognise as the teleportation beam. He slowly climbed to his feet, glancing around to try and work out where he was. He seemed to be standing on top of a fifty foot high column, with a platform five foot square. Around him were arranged other columns with creature he recognised as other denizens of the Arena-Zoo. All their columnes seemed arranged in a circular pattern just along the inside of an enormous arena. Around the outside was a stadium that seemed carved out of dark grey rock, teeming with life (both grey skinned Alien, and apparently an array of other species). His ears were assailed with jubilant cheers and whoops from all sides, although that still didn't hide the enormous crash that could be heard echoing from the centre of the Arena, as well as the deep roars. He slowly turned in time to see two creatures, easily sixty feet tall each, tearing into each other. They seemed to be of the same species, both with a tough leathery hide and relatively slender, sinewy forms. They stood up on hind legs, clawing at each other with forepaws despite obviously being designed for four limbed locomotion. Their enormous, man-long talons raked across each other's hides, drawing enormous sparks.
"Holy..." was all Shade could muster the will to say, the rest of the phrase died on his lips.
Chapter 9
"Brutal, isn't it" spoke a voice he hadn't heard before. Shade turned on the spot (the pillar wouldn't allow much else to see in the cell next to his stood a humanoid blue skinned woman. A tight jump-suit like outfit covered her body, while piercing red coloured eyes with no iris' or pupils peered at him under a black mane of hair. Her face had a disturbingly human grin on it as her eyes analysed him.
"More people speak English out here then on Earth..." was all Shade could bring himself to mutter. She laughed a very human laugh.
"Are you surprised there are alot of species who've developed the ability to communicate with someone despite the language involved? My species just subconsciously signal to you what I mean, and you interpret whatever nonsense noises I'm making as -your- language. You seem sentient, they're always the ones to watch out for in this Arena."
"So... are we gonna have to kill each other at some point?" She shrugged off his comment before responding.
"Unlikely, I imagine you'll be chomped in half LONG before I die... But then again, I'm planning to escape here shortly." Her casual tone caused Shade's eyes to narrow in her direction.
"You're rather open about talking to me about it."
"That's because ye be an out-of-Arena murderer in their eyes. The grey-men view you are untrustworthy, even if you tried to tell them they'd see it as just a trick."
"There's more to it then that."
"Aye. I want you to help us, laddie." Shade just frowned for a few moments, before asking the most important question that he could think when confronted with a proposal like that.
"Why... are you starting to sound like a pirate?"
"Because ye subconscious be what dictatin' me words, an' I think ye be startin' ta realise what I am."
"And how would I have worked that out?"
"Casual disregard of ye - and everyone else here's - life. Mention of an escape plan - which'll 'ave to involved a ship o' some kind - an' ye always liked tha' idea o' Space Pirates, me hearty." Shade just rested the tips of his fingers on his temples, trying to ignore both the way she was speaking, and the sound of one of the enormous brutes in the Arena driving another one to the ground and clawing at it's face.
"For gods sake, stop that." She seemed taken aback for a moment, before shrugging.
"Sorry, I don't control how you hear me. Though I imagine since you're consciously aware of that, you'll slowly tune me in to how you prefer to hear me." Shade opened his mouth to ask her why she'd slowly started to speak in a breathy, sultry tone, but decided it was best to let sleeping Alien Pirates lie.
"So, you mentioned a plan?" The Piratess went quite and waited as any response was drowned out by an enormous cheer from the crowd. Shade turned and watched as one of the brutes enormous teeth seized upon the throat of the other and - with a torrent of blood that would have done Freddy proud - tore a massive chunk of flesh clear. The victim stumbled back with a Godzilla-like screech of agony, before crouching down on its haunches, obviously not done yet.
"Yes, I do. These pillars aren't too strong, and once they're broken we're out've our cages. All we have to do is survive a relatively short time in the arena with those creatures - and avoid the combots they're likely to send in to capture us again - until my crew get here with their diversion." Shade turned back to the Piratess and just frowned.
"Oh. Is that all?" She paid his words no heed as she knelt down and drew back a fist before pummeling it down onto the pillar she was perched on. A heavy crack was already visible from that one punch.
"C'mon, what're you waiting for?" Shade shrugged and knelt down, drawing his own hand back.
"Here's hoping this doesn't result in the destruction or enslavement of Earth..." His fist lashed out into the ground.
"OW! Sonnohva-!" He straightened up and shook his hand, wincing and muttering further curses. He looked over and saw the Piratess was paying him no heed, the crack at her feet now quite large. At that Shade just had to shake his head yet again before adopting a different tactic. He knelt down once more and rested his hand against the surface of the stone. He could feel the immense number of cracks in it's surface, and the shadows within them. His eyes closed as his concentration mounted, each little fragment of Shadow being ripped through the solid mass around it, slowly grinding away at the stone's surface. He could hear another enormous cheer from the crowd, but he didn't allow it to distract him.
C'mon, you can do this. It's just an unknown alien super-strong substance, surely you can rip it apart with the POWER OF THE MIND... Well, your 'super power', at least. And then what? Hope this Pirate lady holds good on her end of the deal? And even if she does, we've got to survive however long it takes for her ship to get here. And then I've got to hope this Alien Empire won't decide to enslave or kill Earth anyway - which I imagine they will after the insult of me escaping - before finally we've got to find out where the hell Earth IS, so I can get back - WHOA -
Thankfully, his rather dull musings were interrupted as the stone beneath him gave way. Cut off from it's housing, the energy cage around him died as the pillar began crumpling. Shade's feet fell from under him as he began plummeting the rather impressive distance to the ground. He looked around for anything that could be seen to halt his fall, but could see nothing.
Or alternatively I could plummet to the ground and snap my spine before any of those other worries matter.
Those thoughts fled his mind when he felt himself be caught gently in surprisingly strong arms. He grunted at the impact, before turning to find himself held like a damsel in distress by the blue-skinned Piratess.
"Need a hand there, bucko."
"My Hero."
Thankfully (or unfortunately, dependant on your perspective) the cliche jokes were interupted by the sound of gates opening along the Arena and the metallic tromp of robotic feet, mingled with the still frenzied roars of Alien monsters. Shade and the Piratess turned to look at each other, then turned to look at the easy dozen Combots advancing on their position, projectile and energy weapons held outstretched aimed at them, while in the background the now victorious Behemoth gnawed at it's rivals throat.
"... Ahh crappit."
Chapter 10
In the mere moment it took for the Piratess to drop Shade to the ground and leap behind a rather large section of pillar rubble herself, he'd analysed the standard shape of the 'Combots'. They were the same ones that had carted him to the leader of the grey skinned Aliens before, standing easily twenty feet in height. Their armour consisted of gleaming white metal covering any point of solid construction, although their limbs could be seen as somewhat thinnner dusty grey. Some of their arms ended in what were obviously gun points, while others had three fingered claws (though they seemed to nearly always be holding weapons themselves). Their legs were a reversed joint set up, seeming far too slender to hold up the weight of they supported, and so too seemed the narrow waists that connected their legs with the rest of them. Their torsos were slightly hunched over, with a vaguely humanoid head jutting forward from their shoulders, supported by what looked like thick silver threads.
"What're you doing! Get behind some cover!" shouted the distractingly sultry voice of the Piratess.
"Oh, right." Shade quickly clambered to his feet and leapt behind some ruins of the pillar he'd collapsed.
"Do you have a plan for beating these things?" he shouted at the woman who he'd entrusted his life to.
"We jus' need to survive another couple a' minutes, then me crew will get here with tha' distraction I was talkin' about."
"So you won't mind if I have a bit of fun before that?"
"Go for i- wait, what do you mean by fun?!" The last sentence was shouted at Shade with a hint of desperation in her voice as he got to his feet and began sprinting towards the Combots. Part of his mind registered that he could hear the crowd start to cheer his audacity, the rest of him was too busy considering his ludicrous his plan was. In his peripheral vision he could see numerous Combots lock their weaponry on his sprinting form, though it was only the three right in front of him - and between him and his goal - that held his attention.
Kneeshatter into uppercut. Vault upon platform and stomp. Stop, drop and roll. Rubble at feet, fling, charge, destroy waist.
He repeated that Mantra to himself in his mind as he continued the charge, explosions from energy and kinetic force weaponry detonating in the ground around and behind him, but none touching him. He continued to repeat the mantra right up until he reached the first Combot, it's arms revealing their slow lumbering nature as they struggled to lock onto his small form, right up until he was through their arc of fire. His fist lanced out at the exposed joint of the reversed knee, shattering it. As the war machine began to stumble he leapt up with an uppercut crunching through it's head-structure. As the machine tottered and began to fall - while he was still in the air - he gripped onto it's shoulders and hurled himself up onto the relatively flat surface, before leaping the fifteen feet to the same relatively flat platform of the second combot. It ineffectually began to raise it's arms towards him before his boot stomped down with superhuman strength upon its neck, shattering the connection. The Combot's head-structure hung loosely by a few threads for a moment, before simply falling off. The Combot's body went rigid and began to collapse upon itself. Shade leapt off the falling structure and landed in a forward roll as the weapon fire from the third combot (as well as the multitude scattered around the place) exploded into the ground where he'd just been. He rolled to his feet, picking up a chunk of debris from the pillar as he went, and hurled it at full force towards the Combot. The rock struck its target, smashing into the machine's sensors and causing it to stumble back a few paces, its weaponry no longer firing without a target. As he sprinted towards it, a portion of shadow was gathered to his hand, before being flung out in a crescent shape towards it's waist. While not penetrating far, the pure negative energy managed to melt away at some of its armour around the narrow waist section. More then enough to allow Shade to punch through what remained, clear to the other side - snapping the machine in half - and letting it crumple like the other two had. Now there was nothing in the way of him and his goal. He continued sprinting towards the enormous behemoth creature, distracted as it was by feasting upon its recent foe.
C'mon, c'mon... let this work.
Shade couldn't help but let out a shout of exhileration as he saw some of the Combot weaponry overshoot him and smash against the armoured hide of the enormous brute. The creature reared up on its hind legs and roared in anger, before turning to face the robots that had fired upon it, completely ignoring the human running through its legs. Shade glanced over his shoulder and laughed as he watched the enormous creature begin to lap into the Combots, their weaponry ineffectually pattering against its thick hide. On the other side he could see the Piratess, shock and amazement playing upon her features as the full battle royal erupted in the Arena.
"I'm utterly awesome normally. This is just what happens when I put a little effort into it." Shade grinned and brushed some dirt off his shoulders.
Chapter 11
Any celebration was cut short as the sounds of the cheers of the crowd, the roars of the Monster and the heavy gunfire of the Combots was joined by a different sound. As a Shadow passed overhead, Shade tilted his head up to see a craft of some kind alight near where the Piratess crouch. She turned and gestured him over with a hurried wave, before turning back to the craft. A hatch on the side of the rough-looking moderate sized ship opened up without it touching the ground, and the Piratess leap up, grabbing onto the ramp and pulling herself up. Shade started sprinting in the direction of the ship, although his attention was distracted by more shadows passing overhead, the arrival of which seemed to change the cheers of the crowd into panicked cries of terror. He glanced up and saw what could only barely pass as workable crafts beginning a descent, all of which seemed to be trying to land in the stands and upon the saucer-ship-stands arranged around the arena, none in the Arena itself. He leapt over the remains of one smashed Combot, wrapping Shadows around his waist in mid air and 'yanking' himself along with them, the extra momentum allowing him to land on the ramp of the Piratess' ship. She reached out, grabbed a shoulder and pulled him in just as the Hatch closed.
"What the hell are those ships?"
"Our distraction" the Piratess answered, turning away from him and sprinting down the hall. Not wanting to be left behind Shade followed, occasionally glancing around at the humanoid and not-so-humanoid individuals that seemed to make up her crew. It was only a matter of seconds before the corridor led to another, which in turn led to the bridge, but in that time she'd already started screaming in anger.
"I said 'A distraction', not a-" the next word seemed to come in as garbles, "- warfleet of Revenants!" she screamed at the four foot tall Lizard like creature in the cockpit. Shade grabbed onto the walls to hold himself steady as the ship angled itself up near vertically and began flying forward, evading the ever-growing number of the barely-intact ships. The Lizard like creature shrilled something back at the Piratess, who shook her head.
"Just go, go! And don't let them launch any boarding probes at us! This way the Arena-masters will be too busy saving their crowd to worry about wiping out planets," she turned and glanced at Shade, before gesturing at a spare seat-like object. "Strap yourself in. This'll be a rough ride."
"I'm used to rough by now." Shade sat down, then ineffectually glanced around, looking for the straps. "How does, er-" his words were interupted by two lines of goo shooting out from near his waist, angled up to wrap around his shoulders crossing over each other in the middle. The goo solidified mere seconds later, although when he leaned forward to test it they gave somewhat, allowing him comfort.
"Before ye ask, those things are Revenants. We dunno what makes them, just that they board ships, and turn those on the ship into their own kind. They ain't too smart, but their fleets always seem to find others." She lowered herself into another seat, unconcerned as the goo wrapped around her. Shade blinked a few times, before trying to look away at the goo-buckles and the effect they had on her chest.
She's an ALIEN. And now is NOT the time to go Lady-crazy.
... A few quick peaks wouldn't hurt, though.
NO! ALIEN!
Alien with very firm-
Don't make me give you a headache! I will! I swear it! Try to have a libido when your head's pounding!
Shade just shook his head to himself, leaning forward to look out the cockpit. Already he could see the atmosphere thinning out as they passed into space, although the number of 'Revenant' ships didn't seem to be lessening. A sudden burst of light to their right grabbed his attention, and he saw what looked like a pod of some kind detach from one of the ships and sail towards them, passing mere feet from the cockpit, though even at its fast speed he could see the enormous blade on the front of the pod, presumably to cut through the ships hull. He could only see it for a small moment, but he could never forget that momentary glimpse he saw of the occupant through the pods viewport. The creature looked humanoid, although its skin was covered in wounds, which in the brief moment he saw it looked like bite marks of various kinds. What unnerved him most was the creatures eyes, which just stared through the two plains of transparent material between them, seeming to burrow into his soul with a hunger no food could satisfy.
Well, THAT got rid of your libido.
"Holy... That was a Revenant?" The Piratess nodded.
"We're nearly clear of the fl-" her words were interupted by a sudden radio-garbled cry of terror. She slowly turned her head towards an empty viewscreen, before reaching out and flicking a switch next to it. The screen suddenly filled with a view from down on the planet, a squat creature with four arms shouting something Shade couldn't understand into the screen.
"What's he saying?"
"It's a cry for help. It seems the Revenants have already swarmed the Combots and taken them apart... I had expected them to last longer." The squat creature continued it's desperate cries while on the Arena stands behind him was filled with carnage. Alien creatures fled in terror from other Alien creatures, the latter of whom gave chase with frightening speed. One of the victims was dragged down under the tentacles of a squid-like creature covered in bite marks with chunks of flesh missing from its hide. The last they saw of the Victim was a hand desperately reaching out for any help, before the central mouth of the Squid-thing began its feast.
"I... I'm going to turn it off" stated the Piratess in a subdued voice as she reached out for the switch. Moments before the screen went black they saw an ethereally graceful creature leap at the Squat creature shouting at the screen, wrapping arms and legs around him from behind and ripping a chunk out of his neck with an unnaturally wide mouth. All Shade could do was reach out and rest a hand on the Piratess' shoulder.
"You ok?"
"Nay... I wanted a distraction so we could escape. Now I'm responsible for the deaths of tens of thousands." Shade just shook his head.
"And the lives of so many more. You said yourself the Arena masters will be too busy to destroy worlds, now. And those beings who die? They're willing to pay good money - or whatever you use out here, credits probably - to watch sentient beings die for their pleasure. You're doing the galaxy a favour, you did the right thing, they deserved this." The Piratess nodded slowly and gave him a slight smile, resting a hand on his own.
Shade wished he believed his own words, but he didn't.
Chapter 12
Part of him wished he had a baseball and catching mit, if only so he could relive the Great Escape. Instead all he had to do to pass the time in his small locked cell was to listen to the muffled noises of the Alien Pirate crew shouting at each other in languages he had no hope of understanding. He couldn't even hear the Piratess saying anything. All he could tell is that the crew were angry he was present for some reason.
It's not like I'm the one who fed the hundreds of thousands of spectators on that planet to an armada of Alien Zombies.
Try as he might, he couldn't forget. The hungry eyes of the 'Revenant' as it's boarding pod flashed past the cockpit. The vicious tearing of flesh from desperate squat alien in the distress call. The screams of panic in the background.
He had been abducted by an Alien Empire and used as a lion in ancient Rome, turned into a creature to pit against others to the death for the amusement of the mob with the fate of his entire planet resting upon his performance. He had murdered an alien creature in his own mind and been stabbed in the chest. Even throughout all that he had managed to see the entire expedition in a lighthearted, jovial manner. Somehow it had gotten worse, though.
Trust mass genocide at the hands of my 'rescuers' to ruin the mood.
His thoughts were interupted by the sound of the small cell's door swishing open, revealing a tall Alien creature clad in armour from head to toe with the Piratess standing beside him. She looked muted, like before, stricken at the deaths at the hands of the Revenants. The tall armoured being spoke in a gutteral tounge, never taking its eyes off Shade as he stood up. The Piratess translated once he finished.
"The Dread Captain Lc'Huck did not agree to bring you onto his ship when rescuing his daughter," it took a few seconds for that statement to sink in, but she continued on regardless, "but does not wish to have any not of his crew aboard his ship. He offers you a position on his crew."
"Hey, I just want to go home. Tell him I appreciate the offer, but have to decline." The Piratess paused for a moment, before responding.
"That isn't a good idea. The alternative is death by vacuum. But as a member of his crew, he will agree to take you where you wish." Now it was Shade's turn to pause before replying.
"And let me guess, a true member of his crew wouldn't want to leave?"
"... Yes."
"Well, it looks like I get to live the life of a space pirate."
---
This outfit isn't what I expected thought Shade as he tugged at the bulky gloves on his pressurised space suit. The faceless form of another pirate floated over to him slowly within the vacuum of the open hanger. He didn't know it was the Piratess (who's name he'd not learnt, he just realised) until she spoke up over the comms.
"I'm sorry about this. I didn't intend for you to get dragged into it all."
Silence greeted her.
"Are you ok?"
More silence.
"You've got to press that button on your glove to turn the comms on."
"Thanks. And yeah, I'm sorry it happened too. So what're we supposed to do here." He tilted his head up as best he could, for a man in a space suit with no neck, and gazed at the ship just outside the hanger a vast majority of the crew were standing in. Those who needed it were suited up, though a surprising number of the Aliens seemed capable of surviving in a Vacuum. The ship itself showed the heavy damage he had seen it take from the Pirate craft's guns. The hull was obviously breached, atmosphere pouring out of numerous holes in it. The engines seemed to be struggling for life, though he had been told that even if they somehow did achieve that miracle the grappling rods currently embedded in their ship would prevent them from making a get-away.
"Get ready, Dark stranger," spoke the Piratess, turning to face the open hull doors and spaceship a good three hundred feet distant, "for soon we strike." Shade could see the good hundred other creatures in the hull with him get ready, those with legs bunching up their muscles (or whatever passed for them) and preparing to leap, while others did whatever their forms would allow for such an action.
"Now!" A wave of Space pirates of dozens of different and varied species leapt out of the open hanger doors and into the blackness of space, aiming at a target a hundred meters distant, with nothing to catch them should they miss.
I'm starting to think Flash Gordan lied to me about what space life was like...
Chapter 13
The bulky magnetic (at least, that's how he assumed they worked) boots engaged with a whirring noise that was audible in his suit as they latched onto the side of the ships hull. Despite the frantic nature of their leap into nothingness, the entire crew (all of whom had 'landed' safely) moved with an almost comical slugishness as they moved towards a central point. Within that point, an enormous four-armed humanoid, all other features hidden by the combat-space-suit knelt, cutting into the hull of the ship with a laser. As Shade approached the group, one of them turned its helmet in his direction, before turning to the rest. It bobbed its head slightly, but he couldn't hear it speak (as he understood no languages, it was apparently decided the only one who's comm frequency he was given was the Piratess). What was more disturbing was the fact that most of the other pirates tilted their helmets towards him, then a vast number bobbed their heads in what he assumed was each species form of laugher. As the four armed humanoid attached the laser to a section of his belt and reached down to yank off the cut section of the ships hull, one of the larger pirates grabbed Shade by his shoulders and pulled hard enough his magnetic boots detached from the hull. The creature began sedately marching him towards the hole they'd cut.
"They have decided that," spoke the Piratess in a sedate tone, "as the new member of the crew, you are to go in first. The section of the hull they've cut will be empty, you'll have to find and enter through an airlock, then survive whatever ambush the survivors have..." He assumed the slender (well, more slender, at least within the bulky space suits) figure looking away from him was the Piratess, so he tilted his helmet in her direction to speak.
"Cheerful bunch," was all he could get out before being dropped (as much as one can be dropped in a vacuum) into the laser-cut hole. His magnetic boots dragged him down to the ground beneath, while the absense of deadly weaponry ringing out confirmed the Piratess' guess that there was no ambush just yet. He turned around a few times before locating an airlock, presumably right where the Pirates had guessed it would be. It took agonising minutes for him to pass the twenty feet between where he stood, and the airlock, before pressing the button he hoped opened it.
"I think I'm getting the hang of this space stuff" he muttered to himself as the door slid open. He stepped in moments before it closed automatically behind him. While waiting for the small enclosure to fill with air, he realised why they had sent him in first. The room was tiny, no more then two or three pirates able to enter at a time, and it seems he was the pawn sacrifice. He pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind and began removing his Space-suit-armour. His super-hero suit, which he had worn since his abduction all throughout the proceedings, was still in fine condition, but he doubted the advanced armour and protective systems he'd installed or the TDI fibre it was made of would be enough to protect him from advanced laser weaponry. All he could do was take a deep breath and press the switch to open the interior of the airlock, waiting to see what ambush the cruiser's survivors had planned for the newly christened pirate.
It was more horrible then he could have imagined.
Their defenses struck him to the very core.
It was a set of large brown eyes, belonging to a child sized humanoid with green skin and fins in place of hair, tears beginning to well up within the childs eyes while a female looking adult creature of the same species held it close. Around the pair were dozens of other similar family groupings unable to defend themselves, and around them stood a half dozen members of the species that either seemed too old, too weak or too young to properly defend themselves, let alone defend the rest of their group. On the far side of the room was a hanger door and a small shuttle that looked just like it would be able to hold the group, though the sparking from inside an exposed panel as well as the individual of their species fiddling with the electronics exposed, told Shade how attempting to fly it to safety was a last resort.
In that moment, Shade knew what to do.
---
"What is taking that blasted Pink-skin so long!*" shouted the Dread Pirate Lc'Huck, smashing a hand glad in black armour with green tintings into the console in front of him. "Your Daughter says he responds to no attempts to contact him," spoke a fearful voice over the radio. No one wished to be the one to speak to Lc'Huck when he was angry, but the fate was worse for them all if none spoke up. "Blast! It seems he was not worth the effort it took to suit him up! Send in an assault team!"
---
The airlock opened to reveal three normal sized humanoid creatures - a reptilian, a red-skinned creature with spinly limbs, and a furred alien - each with a blade with a glowing edge in one hand, and what was presumably a ballistic or energy projectile weapon in the other.
And they didn't even arm me before sending me in? Cheapskates thought Shade as he leapt at them before they'd even cleared the air-lock, a foot catching the furred creature in the chest and sending him flying back against the wall of the exterior airlock door, the lessened gravity of the out-of-control ship doing nothing to stop his flight. The other two turned and reacted to Shade's presence, one firing a shot with it's energy blaster, the other swiping wide with it's blade. Shade leapt into the air and rotated backwards on the spot, letting the blade pass beneath him and the shot pass just above his stomach. He dropped back down onto the deck and leapt at the Reptillian, his hands gripping onto its head while his feet lashed out at the blue-skinned humanoid, catching it on its apparently weak chin, the crunch of brittle bones easily felt. His feet continued around, using the head of the Reptiliant as a fulcrum before coming to rest on the wall, and more specifically the console for the airlock. He used the wall as a platform to jump off, bringing his knees into the back of the Reptillians head and sending the creature stumbling forward. Behind him he could hear the sounds of the Airlocks inner door closing, quickly followed by the outer door opening. Shade gracefully landed on his feet as the Reptilliant shook its head while still resting on its hands and knees. It barely had time to look up before Shades boot lashed out into its face. Shade turned back to the Alien families behind him, and couldn't help but smile when he saw the awe struck look in the large eyes of the inhuman child.
---
"C- Captain Lc'Huck?*" spoke a different fearful voice. The Dread Pirate Captain's command chair swivelled to the comm unit, an irritated look hidden behind his armour. "What is it, curr?" "Th- four assault teams, totalling fourteen crew, have not reported back, Captain. Except for Hthar, who was... ejected out of the airlock. As he went his body impacted with Gan, who... was dragged into the black with him" The silence from Lc'Huck could mean many things, none of which would be good for the crew. "Fifteen dead. Hold yer position. I'm coming out meself." That was the worst news the Crew had heard all day.
--
For the sixth time that day, the airlock opened. Through it marched the heavily armoured form of the Pirate Captain, and just behind him the Piratess from the Arena. The sight that faced them gave them both pause. Shade stood surrounded by a ring of groaning or simply silent alien pirate bodies, breathing heavily. One hand rested on his side while the other held out in a half-fighting stance, feet positioned a shoulders width apart. The armoured figure recovered quickly and confidently strode out, beginning to speak in his tongue. After he finished, the Piratess began speaking, translating his words.
"The Dread Pirate Lc'Huck states he is disappointed in your decision to mutiny, and has come himself to make sure-"
"Yes yes, I'm sure he's plenty annoyed," interrupted Shade, causing the Piratess to blink in surprise at both his actions and his casual tone, "just do me a favour and ask those green-dudes behind me how long until that shuttles ready. The guy with the tentacles and pistols managed to get a shot off into me." The piratess spoke, before turning to face the Dread Pirate with a fearful look, then relaying Shades message to the Aliens. Lc'Huck turned his helmet towards her as the alien mechanic responded.
"They say only a few minute minutes will be enough to- ugh!" the back of Lc'Hucks armoured gauntlet struck out, sending the Piratess flying back to smash against a metal wall of the room with a heavy thunk. Lc'Huck raised his other arm, a small projectile weapon unfurling from the gauntlet as he spoke in his language. Shade's boot lashed out into the wrist, pushing it aside so the laser bolt merely left a scorch mark in the wall beside her head. Lc'Huck turned to face Shade and gave a wide swing with a balled fist at the Hero's head, which was easily ducked under and responded to with a snap kidney kick, doubling the Alien over, despite his armour. The Captain's clumsy movements and wide swinging punches were easily dodged, even by the wounded hero, but in response none of his punches and kicks seemed to do anything but slow down the Captain for more then a few seconds. He was confident in his prime he would have an easier time, but at the moment he was weakened from intense fighting and a laser bold grazing his side. After a mistimed jump, Shade had to lift his arms to form a shield for his body as Lc'Hucks wide swing was obviously going to connect. Without his feet on anything, the punch - while doing no damage - hurled Shade back ten feet into the metal wall. Breath was forced from his body with the impact, but the far more pressing problem was the gauntletted three-fingered hand that closed around his throat before he could recover, lifting him up and slamming him again into the wall. The helmet covering Lc'Hucks eyes didn't hide the hate in his voice as he began speaking in his own tongue. Shade was tempted to make a clever remark - despite the life or death situation - but he knew it would be wasted on his current audience. Lc'Huck suddenly stopped speaking as the sound of a laser pistol being charged could be heard behind him.
"There are so many things I want to say now, like how being your adopted daughter these last ten years has been torment I could no longer bare-" she paused, before pulling the trigger. The armour held for a brief moment under the beam, before melting. There was a brief spasm in Lc'Hucks hand around Shade's throat, before falling limp and the bulky figure collapsed to the ground. Shade caught himself before falling easily, reaching up and massaging feeling back into his sore neck.
"Thanks. I owe you one." He nodded nonchalantly at the Piratess, glancing over at the Alien families. The Mechanic was gesturing them all onto the shuttle, but upon seeing the limp form of their tormentor, shouted out something in his own click-based language.
"He says their shuttle cannot take anymore then it is being loaded with, but there is an escape pod just on the other wall. It will analyse your species and take you to your home planet" translated the Piratess, a slight smile on her face. Shade threw a salute over at the Mechanic as he climbed the boarding ramp - which he returned in somewhat awkward kind. The Hero turned back to face the Piratess, grinning himself behind his mask.
"So... I get to go home?"
"It seems so. As his adopted daughter, I believe I will be able to keep the crew together long enough to get us somewhere I can abandon them... I never enjoyed this life."
"Well, it seems everyone wins this way," he threw her a casual salute as well, before turning and easily finding the escape pod entrance on the opposite wall, walking over to it. He had only taken a few steps before the Piratess' words stopped him.
"Wait!" he turned back to see her hesitate over her words, "I never learnt your name." He just chuckled softly in response.
"I never learnt yours."
"I am E'lay'ne." Now it was Shade's turn to pause. He blinked a few times, before speaking up.
"E'lay'ne..." He turned and gestures at the dead body, "Lc'Huck."
"Yes. What is your name." Shade glanced between E'lay'ne and Lc'Huck a few times before speaking up.
"I am Guybrush Threepwood." E'lay'ne smiled warmly and inclined her head respectfully towards him.
"I shall tell all I see about Guybrush Threepwood, mighty pirate."
"You have NO idea how happy that sentence makes me."
---
Shade waved once at the re-space-suited E'lay'ne as she entered the airlock, before pulling closed the hatch of the escape pod. It took a few seconds before the almost organic-looking systems inside began firing up to light, an eerie green glow visible throughout its interior.
"Yes yes, just hurry up and take me home."
The pod seemed to just 'drop' away, all weight vanishing for a split second as the view from the screen blurred, only to be replaced with the deep black and pinprick white of space. The systems of the pod began speaking in a garbled tone at him.
"Oh don't tell me the damned things defective..."
"language analysis complete. Genetic trace complete. Species: unidentifiable-"
"Oh you are goddamned kidding me. Bloody mutation..."
"Nearest match, human, dominant species of Sol system major body three-"
"Ok, I take it back. Thank you escape p-whoa!" The shout of surprise was elicited by thick goo - like the 'seat belts' of the ship before - sliding over his entire lower body, holding it in place and removing the 'weightless' feeling.
"Journey length in species local timing system: 9 hours approximately."
Enough time for a power nap thought Shade, settling down into the surprisingly comfortable goo and closing his eyes, his body filled with the elation of going home.
His home planet was violent, abusive to many of its natural wonders and its own people, in many ways harsh and unforgiving. But he wouldn't trade it for anything.
