Attorney at LAW
From Unofficial Handbook of the Virtue Universe
The Attorney at LAW is one of Earth, Inc.'s finest lawyers as well as the aide-de-camp to the CEO of Earth. Normally tasked with aiding the company legal team's efforts in staving off hostile takeovers from forces such as Planet X and the CEO of Bizarro Earth, she took a busman's holiday when the CEO traveled to Paragon City, traveling with him in order to dissuade any possible lawsuits that could arise from the head of the planet beating up random thugs and the homeless. Mostly by shooting them.
Upon the founding of The Circle of Jerks, Attorney at LAW was called upon to handle the local legal team's efforts to exonerate the group from any and all blame for property damage, theft or injury (except in instances when it was really, really funny) in addition to ensuring that everyone had clean underwear on before they went out to fight crime. During this time she took a less active role in vigilante work, preferring to focus more on her area of expertise. Mostly because it didn't involve going through sewers or getting attacked by rock monsters.
Following the announcement of Pluto Industries' lawsuit against Earth, Inc. for libel (triggered by Earth, Inc.'s comments on Pluto's sudden downsizing of most of its staff), Attorney at LAW left for Earth, Inc. headquarters to deal with the impending legal debacle. Before she departed, however, she left behind the Librum Lex Maleficum, a tome which was later used to summon the second head of The Circle of Jerks' legal team, the Arch Attorney.
- The efforts of Attorney at LAW may or may not have been instrumental in convincing the Paragon City Council that the rupture of the Overbrook Dam in Faultline (circa Issue 8) was due to shoddy construction and strange lunar activity and not, say, one of the Jerks pressing a button in the Jerk Hole labeled "DO NOT PUSH." We're not saying anyone's to blame; just that, if someone theoretically was to blame, Attorney convinced them otherwise.
This entry is a stub. Jerks and Jerk-related people may update it with relevant information. All slanderous or libelous claims will prosecuted to the fullest extent of Paragon City law before everyone just gives it a pass and beats the crap out of the party responsible.