Wild Surge/The Dramah Part 2
From Unofficial Handbook of the Virtue Universe
It was easier like this. In her room with all the lights low, nothing but the ventilation system for sound, no one around to see her humiliation. Just the comm unit. She'd been listening a while. It didn't sound like he was busy. So now---
She keyed his code, and whispered into the unit. "....um.....Surge?" She felt her throat close. "I'm sorry." Three times in the tram station, twice to Ash and his friends this morning. Would he finally hear it now?
"Yo."
"I was mean and rotten," she whispered, staring at the pattern of the tiles on the floor.
Silence, then, "It's all good chica."
"I'm glad you found friends." Her eyes stung. Why did he have to leave them? She thought they were family.
Unexpected answer made the stinging stop. "I found more friends. Not replacement friends. You hear what i'm sayin?"
She sniffed, and blinked. "K---"
"I dunno where y'all thought I left cuz y'all wern't hardcore or whatever," he continued, as she clutched the comm. "I left cuz I work better with them. I don't get them faceplanted like I did you guys."
Well, she'd been with them this morning, and---they all fought like Surge did, in a mad rush. Nuts. Maybe he didn't faceplant as much because they all fought the same way, and it kind of got shared around. She should just keep her mouth shut. It worked for him he was happy, and---and they didn't have to answer to anybody, the way the YC had to answer to Mr. Nash and Mr. Twilight.
"Y'all are a good team, and y'all are friends," he continued. "Hell, sucks at times without Torch around. Ain't was and never was bout you girl. You do fine."
She blinked at that. He thought she did fine? She stared at the comm in her hand. Yes, the code said Surge. Was this some mirror-universe Surge?
But---"K---" she whispered.
"Now whats this bout you leavin the champs?" he asked, sounding a teeny bit angry.
"I just....just don't feel like I'm anything but a drag on them," she said, fingers slipping back and forth on the arm of the new suit. Blue Streak---that was more like what she was good for. Run to get messages, fire off some heals when someone was sick, to warn someone of a problem, now and again to clear the CoT off the roof...
He was angry. "And leave them without thier primary healer?"
But they don't need me. They have others. "I just don't know anymore."
"Yo." he replied. "Thats wack. You is meant to be a champ."
She'd thought that once. Now...."...but...."
"No buts girl," he said, roughly. "With me gone, they need you."
The team last night with no blaster. Except she'd been the blaster.
"I...." the crybaby thing still hurt. She sniffed. "I'm not good with holding in my feelings."
"Then like anyone, everyone, you got something to work on. I gotta learn to not be so hyper. Merc has to learn ...something. And you gotta get a little tougher. Not alot. Just a little chica. Just enough so when you need to cry, you can do it on your terms."
Instead of every five minutes, it seemed like. She felt the Headache From Hell beginning where her neck fitted into the back of her skull and reached for her bottle of water and pills.
".....I wish I was stronger," she whispered, after belting them down.
She expected him to agree. Shocked her when he didn't. "You dont need to be stronger. You is fine there. Just a little...I dunno...You need to just...let shit go a little, you know?"
Not be such a control freak he probably meant. Or did he mean not take things so personally?
".....it's hard...." she whispered.
She heard something in his voice she hadn't expected. Something almost protective. "You know what you need? You need a homes to take your mind off of stuff. You know? Someone you can chill with. You know."
She needed a boy. Oh sure. And what would she do with one? She thought of Lady M and Dante, Merc and Mel, the cute kissing and---started to cry. Because---well, it was crying for something she would never, ever have, and it wasn't as if she even had any idea what that would feel like, but it seemed like, she was standing there on Christmas watching everyone else open their presents and there was nothing for her but an empty stocking.
"Aw damn, Verte," he said, sounding unhappy himself. "Don't do that."
She whispered around a sob. "Surge----Surge I can't do that."
"C'mon chica....why not?" he said, coaxingly.
"I got no girl stuff, Surge," she replied, with a remote sadness that ached somewhere just behind her breastbone. Mourning maybe, for what was gone before she'd even really had it.
"Yo, I said chill with," he corrected. "You don't need a man, you need someone to hang with that gets into the same stuff you do. Like that book shit you readin and that sad ass I need to wear black clothing music I heard from your room." That almost made her smile, because the only thing she could think of that matched that was Gregorian Chant.
Well, the monks did wear black....
The problem was, she was way more used to being around adults than anyone her own age. The age spread at the Facility was all over the place, but there were only two or three near her age, and none of them had much in common with her. "...I....maybe Bella?"
"Naw," he replied, sounding completely sure of himself "Needs to be a dude. Need a differnet perspective on the world. Women just get on each others nerves after a while. But a dude and a chica can chill together forever and not get sick of it."
The mere thought made her blink, perplexed. She'd never really seen a guy and a girl together where they weren;t---together. "I....dont know any guys like that, not really," she whispered.
"You oughtta ask around the group then," he replied with confidence. "I know at least one homie that fits that description."
That made her blink harder. This must be a mirror-universe. ".........who?" she whispered. ......cause I'm livin at the airport here. It's all going over my head."
There was amusement in his voice. "Who was badmouthing me to y'all, but only met me once in the hallway? Think he was badmouthin' me cuz he don't like me...or he thought you didn't like me?"
Only met once or twice, only met once or twice....".......Um........Link?"
Surge chuckled.
As usual, she must have misread. "Wrong answer?"
"Naw chica. You good." It was Link? "See? You just don' give yourself nuff cred. You know what's goin' on. You just aint sure of your instincts. If yer gut tells you sumpin, soimetimes you gotta lissen, chica."
Well, her gut was saying it was confession time. "I was mad at you cause I thought you were.....you were ditching us." Confession, and let him hear how it had hurt to feel deserted.
His voice softened a little. "Chica...I never left y'all. I'm here. Just different colors. Ya know?"
She shook her head and sighed. Colors. She didn't get that. Not at all. "Well, that's the problem. We don't have colors at the Facility. You're either inside the walls or outside the walls."
He sounded amused. "Yeah, you got dem ugly blue and white uniforms."
"Nonono, I meant Seabourne," she corrected.
"So get some paint. My boys could tag it up for you." It took her a minute to translate, but the idea of a bunch of streetwise kids "tagging" Seabourne was pretty funny.
"Now you're being silly, right?" she asked, trying to make sure it really was a joke,
"Did you laugh?" he asked.
She realized that she didn't want to cry anymore. In fact, what came up out of her throat was a soft chuckle, "yeah."
"Den its all good."
She held the warm comm in her hand for a long time after he signed off, wondering if the good, calm feeling inside was going to last.
Finally, when it didn't go away, she smiled.
Then stood up, and put on the Blue Streak suit, and went out to run.
Written by Mercedes Lackey and Adrian Drake user:AdrianD. Originally posted August 4, 2005
