Winsome Blue
From Unofficial Handbook of the Virtue Universe
| |
| Winsome Blue | |
| Player: @Fiera Arcane | |
| Origin: | Magic |
|---|---|
| Archetype: | Dominator |
| Security Level: | 50 |
| Personal Data | |
| Real Name: | Known to few |
| Known Aliases: | Goes by Blue. Name's only used by specific people: Blue Girl, Little Dove and Bluebell |
| Species: | Human |
| Age: | 30 |
| Height: | 5'9" |
| Weight: | 141 lbs |
| Eye Color: | Bluish gray. They occasionally flash with ferocity and ferality. |
| Hair Color: | Brown |
| Biographical Data | |
| Nationality: | American |
| Occupation: | n/a |
| Place of Birth: | n/a |
| Base of Operations: | n/a |
| Marital Status: | Dating Gadgette (Kris Lane) |
| Known Relatives: | The Keller "Clan" She will always consider the following to be family: Mitsu, Prosper and Shy. |
| Known Powers | |
| None RP'd currently. (Created as gravity/psi control) | |
| Known Abilities | |
| None. (Previously was a Mindwalker. Mental abilities w/ slight manipulation of water. | |
| Equipment | |
| Claws left from her removed Felix form | |
| Loves to dance and to cook. Her favorite snack is a Snickers candy bar or bacon- cooked. | |
WARNING: Mature Content contained within this page.
I've left a few times and always came back. Blue's been here waiting for me each time. Now the game is leaving me- is leaving all of us. I can say with all certainty that if this site stays up and going that my character's life will continue. Her page will be updated. Even if the game does not exist SHE does. She does because I do and because you- the people who've helped make her who she is- exist. I thank you. Blue Thanks you. Enjoy, when you can, the life that she has and continues to live. Feel free to post in the comments section below.
I'm still working on the Novel involving a character based off Blue.
Then
Blue talks very little about her past before her career. What IS known... you'll find below.
A Mystery
Minnesota. The little girl on the streets. A boy named Prosper and his Auntie Nell. A nickname.
... and something even she can't remember that began everything.
Young love that turns to horror
Theme: "Love me Tender" by Elvis
Sixteen year's old and she found a boy who loved her. A boy on the verge of becoming a man who proposed soon after the birth of their daughter. They were married and were happy. Yet all wasn't perfect. Headaches came. Frequent and painful they came. Keene stood by her though. He loved her and with his limited means did his best to find something to alleviate them.
They didn't go away. Not long after August 27th, the day she turned 17, something happened that would shape the rest of her life.
A headache came that morning. Horrible pain. A scream, her own scream, and falling to the floor is all she remembers before opening her eyes and finding her husband lying on the floor and her daughter beside him. Both were unresponsive. Both weren't breathing.
Of course she called 911. In shock she told them that she'd had a headache and that she couldn't remember. Not surprisingly this led to her incarceration in a mental facility. For two years they kept her isolate. In two years she saw another human being five times. All she had with her was a stuffed fish. A stuffed animal that Prosper, who for all intents and purposes is her big brother, had given her as a young teen. She had that, and her mind.
To never sleep
Fear set in while she sat in the silence. She feared closing her eyes so she learned. She trained herself to stay awake. It took almost the entire two years for her to perfect surface sleeping. Relaxing for about two hours a night she could hover near sleep. This was enough for her body to keep going and enough to keep her mind from doing something while she slept that she didn't have control over.
Two years ended. Did they let her go? Or did she escape?
The latter is what Blue has told some close to her. But only a few.
She isn't the girl they put in but the woman is easy to find.
Will they come for her? Time will tell.
A Journey
What she did that led her to the Isles is something she's not shy about.
I'm yours but it'll cost you... trust me I'm worth it
Theme: "Barbie Girl" by Aqua
A beautiful woman with no need to sleep. Now what job could she find?
Escort. Call Girl. High Class Prostitute. Adult Film Star.
Taking on the moniker Winsome Blue she became all the above. She dived into that life, burying any feelings and knowing that to be normal would never be her lot. Her mental abilities surfaced now and again but she kept them tightly hidden. She traveled. She picked up new abilities, new skills. Cooking, dancing, a little bit of painting. Anything they could or would teach or trade for her gifts of sex and pleasure she took.
She took and gave and it brought her to The Rogue Isles. It brought her to Rogue Entertainment.
Friendships found
Theme: "Lean on Me" by Club Nouveau
At Rogue, Blue met two women who would make an impact on her life. Two total opposites they both became like sisters.
Shy, who is true to her name, caught Blue's attention. Starting from a strong need to protect her new friend they became close and still are. Shy found a place in Blue's heart.
Fiesty on the other hand was the young woman who handled Blue's audition. What began with flirting became more playfulness until eventually it grew beyond that to a true friendship that neither one expected.
Steps on her path
Blue decided to try. Struggling within herself she fought her views of love and relationships. Taking a step she found that once she had there was no going back.
A bad step becomes one for the better
Theme: "Torn" by Natalie Imbruglia
She also found that her choice was wrong. When it came down to it what she found was not the man of her dreams but a man who loved someone else.
Ramon, a Rogue employee, was the wrong choice and pain ensued. Through a jumbled mess it came out that Ramon loved Shy, Blue being a substitute at least in her eyes. But she did her best to move on. There were arguments, tears and lots of pain. She found that caring hurt and at one point she went so far as to attempt to end it all, but her mind was too strong and she flew for the first time just missing splattering herself against the rocks below the waterfall.
During this ordeal, Blue found true friends in Sully and X. They grew close and eventually came to share a bond that even to this day is unshakable. It was this friendship and her ordeal with Ramon that made her decision for her. She'd leave Rogue and work for The Silvermoon Pub and Inn. When she requested a job she was made Hostess.
Mindwalking
Theme: "The Avatar's Love" from Avatar: The Last Airbender Soundtrack
Sometimes it's trouble. When you have the ability to enter minds and to manipulate memory it seems there's work to do. Blue found this out.
The woman has been in the minds of a great number of people. What she's done has ranged from unblocking the past, weaving over memories, caging zombie desires, fighting personal pain, erasing memories, transfer of stamina, inducing sleep, calming anger and repairing brokenness.
Those she's done work for have included: Ramon, Tony, Lucas, Roe, Shy, Cel, Quinn, Jason, WhiteTalon, Sully, X, Kima and even a few others. And that was just in 2007!
When she mindwalks her body takes the blunt of what she deals with in the mind. The symptoms include: Sweating, crying, trembling, bloody nose and once it's done... depending on the length and what's done... an extreme weakness.
Twice she's gone too far. Once her body took her strength and she suffered. It began to eat at her physically to support her mind that was in overdrive. Rad offered the medroom of his tattoo parlor and there Roe used her abilities to scare the hell out of Blue. This shock put her system back into order. The second time her mind shut down and she was confused, wandering around almost childlike. It took the persistence of Nelo as well as the help of another mentalist to break her. She had been having a break down, hiding in her own mind.
Eventually she backed off. Taking time for herself, to pause.
She sleeps and then doesn't.
Blue turned from what she use to be. No longer sleeping around or flirting so much she turned to Prosper who'd followed her to the Isles. He loved her and she tried loving him. She tried but eventually, after some discussion, they ended their relationship and went back to being family. He left town however, and, though she hears from him occasionally, they have returned to separate lives. Both are happy they went no further than they did and were able to avoid ruining what they have.
The downside being for her that while with her, Prosper gave her a gift so wonderful. Sleep. Staying awake and using his abilities he was able to take the brunt of her mind's attack, setting her free from the responsibility of control for a few hours. And so she dreamed for the first time in seven years. When he left, that luxury did too.
Someone who also left her was Shy. The woman who'd often shared her bed, not in a sexual way, but in a comforting sisterly way was gone. Leaving behind a relationship with Shamise, a member of Rogue Entertainment, the woman first went to live with her mother. Later, she returned and came home to the Pub. Things had gone wrong and it hadn't been her mother, it'd been a trap. Shamise had moved on, marrying and having kittens. This was hard for Shy but Blue was happy with it. She'd never been comfortable, due to her protectiveness, with Shy being in a relationship with someone so closely involved with Rogue. Shy eventually left, finding a place in Paragon City working for Sinclair Industries.
That added a bit to the loneliness of someone at her side.
Choices
Sometimes we don't know what we want. Sometimes the decision is forced on us. Sometimes.. what you have to decide... hurts..
Two men
After Prosper left, Blue spent a lot of time with Kima. He was a dear friend and one who eventually made known his interest in her. She told him flat out that she was still learning what love was and that she'd be willing to date but nothing more.
Not long after that there came another who expressed his love. Celezgial. Blue told him the same thing.
However, eventually there came a time when she had to make a choice on who to date exclusively. Hounded from both sides she chose Cel. That decision turned things sour quickly. Kima couldn't and wouldn't accept that she wanted to attempt a relationship with Cel rather than him.. believed Cel to be a coward and demanded he do the honorable thing and give up Blue. She was caught in the middle. She didn't love either one of them. She'd chosen one.. she'd chosen one to get to know better, to attempt a relationship with in the hopes of being able to return his love. Perhaps it would have been better if she'd left well enough alone, if she'd have stepped away right then and refused to choose either of them. But she didn't.
It ultimately led to a rooftop battle between two men who were bound as brothers.
Blue witnessed the battle. Cel won. Kima was taken to Hell. Yet it wasn't a victory. They'd both lost a dear friend and both felt guilt.
Neither win
Kima, however, came back. Freeing himself from Hell he came back and brought with him an explanation for the headaches Blue had begun to feel. The pain would only get worse. It was a curse. A curse only he could cure. While talking with him about it the pain struck hard and she fell to her knees. A voice came to her and a man appeared before them. Zenvious had come to offer her a choice. The being he served as avatar for, The METAchron, had kept her under its protection. Her abilities having come from a failed avatar she had been watched for a long time. He had the power to remove the curse and to offer its continued protection from that which came from Hell.
Kima's price was high. In Blue's opinion.. far too high. The man who'd demanded that battle, who'd fought Cel... now to become her savior with strings attached. She couldn't do it. She wouldn't.
Mr. Zen's price? Divest herself of anything demonic. This tore at her heart.
This meant Cel. This meant that she would have to willingly choose to end the relationship that she'd only recently begun. She had yet to tell him she loved him. Though she wanted to see where the relationship could go... the choice was made.
She accepted the Avatar's help and, with Cel attempting to reach her from behind and Kima watching on, she let him go.
This led to harsh words, horrible pain and anger. It led to tears and arguments.
There were and are still many who believe all that transpired between the three to have been Blue's fault. There have been many who've confronted her with their opinions of her. Yet through it all there were those who stood by her and who understood.
Someone unexpected
Theme: "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" by Marvin Gayre & Tammi Terrell
One of the people who'd stood by her was a friend she'd made a month or so before. Don Giordano- mafia don of The Giordano Family as well as owner of the Giordano's Italian Restaurante. The two had become friends after running into each other in Sharkhead. He'd listened as all of the turmoil went on. He'd offered advice. He'd also been adamant on her taking the risk and making a choice. After many discussions he'd pushed her towards the step and she'd followed his advice, choosing Cel. Well.. it tells above how that turned out.
But there was more. After days of anger and ice cold words meant to hurt and sting, Cel came back and, before both Blue and Don, he stabbed himself while willing his demon away. This was supposed to kill him. He'd wanted to die rather than lose Blue. Yet he lived. He lived and called out to her.
Blue said no. What he'd said and what had happened since her previous decision had left her knowing that no matter what she would never.. could never.. return his feelings for her.
Don was there with comfort and understanding. Their friendship continued.
It continued and turned into more.
They began to date though for all intents and purposes it wasn't dating but merely the meeting of friends to chat. She found that with him her feelings were different than they had been towards any of the others she'd met. They spent most of their time talking. Eventually they decided to try a relationship. It wasn't perfect but, at least it seemed, to be close to it. As they dealt with the changes in each others' lives they did it together.
On August 27th, 2007, Blue's Birthday, Don asked her to marry him. She said yes.
Blue had never been happier.
Something no one saw coming
Theme: "Animal I have become" by Three Days Grace
No one prepared her for this.
New things to fear
Blue had always enjoyed "hunting" with Sully. There was a freedom in it. Though he fought as a wolf, tearing, shredding, clawing and then eating she still found herself attracted to it. A part of her yearned to be there beside him, beside him and his wife as well. There'd always been a connection between the three and the hunting only seemed to fit.
The more hunts she went on, the more involved she became. Strange feelings and urges snuck up on her and she found herself doing things she never thought she'd do.
She did them and it terrified her.
Hunting naked. Drinking the blood of the kills. Enjoying the feel of blood covering her body. Taking a bite of a human heart.
There was a fear she was losing her humanity... that something was wrong.
Fenrir himself contacted her. Visions that led her to fear more but to want to understand.
Embracing the change
A few days before her birthday, Blue changed. On a hunt with Sully and X her form shifted to that of something else. Her scream echoed and her surprise was even greater than that.
Yet she felt relieved. Though it's taken more than a few hunts she's now had her first kill. This came after she took her first bite... the first bite of flesh she'd torn through herself.
There were still things to learn. The breadth of her senses (sight, sound, touch and smell) increased- in both of her forms. Adapting to learn how to put those skills into practice with her mental attacks made her a good predator.
Which came first
Yes Don knew this side of his fiancee. He even hunted by her side and saw for himself the feral and animalistic behavior. Though she feared he might leave, she told him. She showed him the other side of herself and explained and his love never changed.
He STILL asked for her hand in marriage. Knowing of everything he still wanted her by his side.
That's love. That's a love she never expected to find.
She faces Death- Twice
Sometimes we make mistakes. Sometimes things just need done.
A Bad Move
Theme: "Stand My Ground" by Within Temptation
Blue wasn't new to protecting those she felt needed it. She'd done so before.
And it happened again. But this time... wasn't so easy.
Blue, wanting to do something good, came up with the idea of helping these six young ladies she'd met on the streets of the Isles. They were in dire straights, doing things no one should ever have to in order to survive. So she became their friend, setting them up in a house and beginning to teach them things. Cooking, sign language, dance and even one of them was learning to read.
Yet there came a day when she arrived at their house to find horror.
The man responsible is still at large. The man who preys on the young and leads a host of mystics, mentalists and various other powerfully gifted men and women is still out there. There are many who have come forward, who have taken it on to kill that man and make him pay. Blue would be happy to see him suffer.
Helping two friends
With the combined effort of Roe, Kyalas and Don she sought to free Talon of the Rikti mind that had trapped him upon their taking his dead body for their own. In doing so she found herself weak and drained in the real world after using all her mental might to keep Don alongside her, safe, and to battle the mental creature inside Talon.
The very next day she found it necessary to help yet another friend. Jason. She waged a mental war inside his head all the while her physical body taking the toll for it. Eventually it came to a point where she was forced to leave Jason's mind and her body slipped into unconsciousness, hovering at death's door. Don, having been with her the whole time in the physical realm, saw to it she was taken to the hospital- her AND Jason, who it appeared made it out of his trauma with the help of some unknown friend. After making sure she was stable he took her home.. to his room.. and there she slept and he remained quiet until the next evening.
Going back and moving Forward
Sometimes facing what you might lose puts things in perspective.
Original Position
Blue started out as the Hostess at the Pub. It's a job she still had even as a partner. Known for her cooking and social graces she seemed to help draw a crowd. While the pub's attendees had been declining, Blue decided to begin anew. The pub would be returned to it's glory as the place to relax and enjoy yourself. Don stood with her. It was, after all, a home for him too.
She succeeded. When she devoted more time, the place became occupied... people came.
A Gathering
The Pub was invited to a party at Club Midnight Obscura. A Costume party where you dressed as a hero. Blue did. There was no specific inspiration for her outfit and she was far outmatched by those who showed up but the fun was there. She made new friends and even Shy showed up for a little while.
The highlight of the night was getting Tony to dance. This made her laugh and smile as he's far from one to do such a thing!
The pair also had a good deal of time to talk, sitting off to the side while the dancing and laughing went on around them.
Striving to become whole
After a wonderful Halloween party at the Pub, Blue had a talk with Don. He'd had a nightmare in which a beast-- and animal-like creature- had killed him. This bothered Blue, as she'd been recently worrying about the what-ifs in regard to her shifted form. Hurting him was the last thing she wanted to do.
So she flew away... escaping into a forest far from the Isles. Once there she called out to Fenrir in supplication. He answered.
Changes
Even when a choice is out of your hand... how you deal with it IS your choice.
Stepping Down
It brewed inside for a little while. She'd been spending less and less time on her duties at the Pub and more and more on personal projects. The inevitable question had spawned while she sat curled up on the couch at Don's house nibbling on pretzels and reading a book. Turning the corner of her page down she'd taken a deep breath and realized she had to decide.
And she made her choice. Breaking her heart she spoke with Don and then with Sully and X. She'd resign her position at the Pub. On Tuesday December 4th she turned in her comm, placing it on Sully's desk the next morning and had the frequency on her new comm set to The Giordano Family.
Interrupted Plans
The wedding date had been set. The Friday after Christmas. Yet things didn't go as planned. Blue spent her holiday with Don's family, enjoying the family gathering. Later on in the evening of Christmas Day while she stood talking to Don she vanished. Poof. Gone.
She was nowhere to be found. Don searched far and wide but it wasn't until two days later that she was found. Ryu had overheard someone talking about a woman with white hair laying half-submerged in the water in St. Martial. It was Blue and he took her immediately to Don. He brought her home, unconscious. This of course made no sense. Without control her mind would fight whatever mind was nearby... but it didn't. Ryu wasn't harmed.. no one was. She lay in that state for a week. Not sleeping, just quiet and still. Don never left her side.
Waking up she remembered little but cold and pain and the dark. She could tell something was wrong and it wasn't till a little bit later she realized what it was.
Her felix form... it was gone. Heightened senses... gone. Claws could appear and she could still purr and growl but the rest was just gone. Her hands would shift into the paws of a lioness- the wrist down becoming covered with soft fur and the claws forming as the nails extend and sharpen. When they retract the hands return to human form.
This hurt her deeply, a part of her being ripped away.
Don, experiencing a mental link, was contacted by Loki, a trickster demi-god and relative to Fenrir. He showed Don what Blue'd been through while she was unconscious and merely laughed at Don's frustration and anger.
Because of all this... there had been no wedding. And that only added fuel to the emotional baggage she was carrying.
Seek and Ye shall Find
Theme: "Final Countdown" By the Symphonic orchestra of Liepaja and melo-m
Blue struggled with her loss and decided she needed to find some answers about herself. Any answers. And she knew of only one man who could give them. Zenvious. With the help of Shy, who had moved to Paragon to work at Sinclair Industries, she was able to make it to the "City of Heroes". Once there she enjoyed a relaxing few days, enjoying no labels of villainy and taking in the beautiful scenery. However the time came to visit with the man who leads The Zenvious Foundation. During their brief talk he elaborated on what he'd told her before. That her powers are not hers. Her mental powers are ones she has no right to. They'd been forced on her by a previous Avatar who'd had no right to give them away.. and had done so by Dark Blood Magic.
However, despite not being hers they would not be taken away. The good she's doing is approved by the METAchron so she'd be allowed to keep them. Besides, he said, taking them away would require ripping away her very soul.
She left there with a little better understanding but not with much more. He refused to tell her anymore except to say that there WAS more in her future.
Two losses she never saw coming
Sometimes things move so quickly you're left scared that everything will fall apart.
Not enough
Cel had returned. She'd visited with him in the D while she was in Paragon. He wanted her back at the Pub. They all did. But she still hadn't decided anything about .. well.. anything. Things were so hectic. While there he foiled an assassination attempt and, after revealing Bikou-- The demon inside him-- he'd left.
The night she returned to the Isles she couldn't find Don so she went to the Pub. Cel was there and they talked, however he was cryptic and aloof. He had her very concerned. Sully and X showed up and it seemed as if Cel were saying goodbye to them all. He told them to prepare themelves. As if on cue, amid their chatter, there entered unbidden 200 Ninja led by Zetsumei, Bikou's demon brother. Sully and X's forms changed and all of them met the adversaries-- bent on protecting Cel, their family member.
It was a fierce battle. However, things didn't turn out well. Bikou was pulled from Cel and left a human to fight alone. Sully, X and Blue were subdued-- held by so many and forced to watch the standoff.
Blue met Cel's mind, giving him all the mental strength she could give... until she couldn't bear to lose anymore of her own. Despite it, it wasn't enough. Cel defeated Zetsu.. but Zetsu ran his sword through Cel.
Within the blink of an eye the battle was over and they were free from their captors. But, running to Cel's side, there was nothing that could be done. He was dying. This hit Blue hard. She held to the hope that this would be like the others. His death not a true death. Yet he was human.. this was a human death and she had to know that too. He said his goodbye's, returning to Blue the bandana she'd given him so long ago when he'd left on his journey. And then he was gone. Immediately her bracelet went cold and it's glow faded, their link severed. She removed his and wrapped it in the bandana. She was terribly weak but waited as Bikou and Sully discussed the burial in the crypt. She demanded one thing. His anklet with the small blue stone be left on and never removed. It was promised and she left.. half flying and half stumbling with her memories held firmly in her hands.
She made it to Don's boat. He was supposed to be on vacation with Blake in Florida. She'd wait. She was so tired and worn. Drained. There was blood loss from the battle, her injuries not horrible but still bad. Don found her there and returned her home. She fell asleep almost immediately and found solace in his arms and care for her.
Goodbyes, returns and a questionable future
Theme: "Foolish Games" by Jewel
Don and Blue's wedding never happened. A situation, a disagreement, arose that they couldn't get past. It's not known to anyone just what was said or the specifics. It's staying that way. Blue and Don decided to end their relationship. It was sudden to all and hurt them both very much.
Blue had friends helping her through the rough time. Including Sully, Fiesty and Tony (who'd returned home to the Pub). Yet she didn't go back to the Pub. She went to stay with one of her friends, Kris (Gadgette), a former employee of the Pub. The young woman offered her a place to stay and Blue took it. Though without Don she once again was unable to sleep. Yet, having somewhere to just... BE.. was necessary.
She was at a complete loss as to what to do or where to go.
A search begins
Theme: "Tomorrow" by Avril Lavigne
On February 26, 2008 Blue left the Isles. She left by private plane and headed for Minnesota. Saying goodbye was hard. Time spent being close with Fiesty was cherished. Hugs and a bit of orneriness were enjoyed with Sully and X. The others she held dear she left letters for, being unable to reach them in person in her haste to leave.
Ahead of her lay a journey she wasn't sure of. First she had to find Prosper. He hadn't answered her letters for a long time and she had to know what happened. That.. and she needed him. He'd help her find herself. He always had.
A Returning
Theme: "Book of Days" by Enya
Eventually... after time had went by. Days. Weeks. A month? Blue came home.
She found a purpose, friendships anew.
A Solidified Path
Taking up residence with Kris again, Blue arrived back in the Isles with something she wanted to do. Those girls, the ones she'd been teaching and getting out of the Isles, were her focus. But not only that. She brought up an idea to Kris and between them they hatched a plan of action. Visiting with Mr. Zen of The Zenvious Foundation they arrived at an arrangement. The Garage would become a front for getting those who wished it out the Isles. While Blue continued to be upfront about her girls, the Foundation's actions would remain behind the scenes. Foundation members themselves would even come across via teleporter to assist when necessary, making sure to disguise themselves so as not to be recognized for who they really are. Those pulling double duty include Katie, Mech, and Shelly.
Some of the friends she's met through this, who've gathered under the secret banner of the Garage are Mission, Jake and Angie.
Victor worked with Blue and a few others before. Then there was an incident and his relationship was put at a bit of a distance. Since then he's begun working with them again every so often. A bit reserved and focused she likes him.
Laughter, Dancing and Dates
Coming to the D, a place of relaxation, she found some new friends. Ira instantly took to her and they began to hang out. Him being a member of the Pocket D Bartending Staff, he was able to get her permission to bartend and she's plopped herself behind that bar a couple times since! Jessii, head of the staff, has become a friend too- welcoming with enthusiasm Blue's occasional help. Another person who's popped into her life is Matt. Both men requested dates. Ira and Blue went on a date and determined it wasn't a date and they aren't going to be romantically involved.. just good friends. Matt hasn't claimed his yet. Rose has become one of her favorite dancing partners though the sexy young woman seems to also have desires on Blue. Terrence often stops for some conversation. Sasha can always be counted on to supply a bit of orneriness and trouble.
From her past are friends who've never deserted her: Fiesty, Nikolai and Irandi.
One of those from the past has renewed their friendship. Rhiannon, the woman who'd found her the day Fenrir gave his ultimatum. The two get along great, flirting back and forth and having a lot in common. Blue has found out just what the "Sexy Villainess" has done in her past. Through discussion it hasn't changed their friendship.
Some other friends she runs into once in awhile from her days at the pub include: Ish and Sam.
Old pain revived
Theme: "One Step Closer" by Linkin' Park
She hadn't visited the Pub since coming back. But she watched it. While watching it she was confronted by two men.
Kima.
And Cel.
Kima she hadn't seen but a few times since the "curse" incident.
Cel... she thought he was dead.
The shock of seeing them both was too much and she ran. But they followed and conversation followed. More than a few of them. They both made plain, again, their intentions. Both said they still loved her.
Overwhelmed, she eventually told Cel to stop, to just stop. She'd turned him down, had never loved him and that he needed to stop with his desire for her. Their friendship needed to stay just that: Friendship. His answer was to turn his back on her completely, to denounce their friendship, sever their mental ties and to -in his words- "return his humanity to her". This broke her heart.
Kima, on the other hand, refused to be rebuffed. She didn't tell him as plainly as she did Cel. There was something there, some tug at her. He kept trying without pushing near as much as the other man.
Eventually, however, he went to far.
He'd analyzed her, making his beliefs about her feelings, reasonings etc. Running. He told her to stop running and to face things, to face him. And in doing so she rebelled, mentally attacking him. Slipping into Mindwalking, her body took the brunt as usual and when it was said and done she was weak, nose bleeding. She was nearly broken. She'd wounded him and they both rested where they fell. The next morning led to another battle. This one physical.
It seems he felt it necessary to try and push her to the limits of her anger. And so he did, with words that hurt deeply and actions he had no right to make.
".. now show me that other blue, not this sad bitch standing before me... i want to see the killer... the one with the REAL power... You know what i speak of, the out of control, power about to escape, claws and fangs Blue, not /you/."
"its not you.. its not the /real/ you... this is a facade... the /real/ Blue is a wild eyed, lustful, killer that has no qualms with hurting people. This is just some sort of...persona..."
"still not taking responsibility for you actions! that is your problem, you're a pathetic whore... at least be honest with yourself..."
"Now.. either prepare to kill me, or i swear to god i will rape and murder you, then bring you back to life to repeat the process."
"deserve!!! all i have to do is give you a credit card you filthy whore!! at least those in Rogue are honest.. you... you're disgusting... hiding...bottling up your rage and anger...scared to make any decisions..."
"is this it? you ARE a whore! you are a virus...you suck the life from people... and look at you now... still holding back.. why? scared? please... show me!!"
"A slut without any responsibility for her actions is still a slut..."
"No... you have to do it now, you will simply turn into a monster later in your life.. you are conflicted...angry, tormented.. relase it now while you can."
"Accept responsibility Blue!! Accept and move on!!! you have to accept it or you will never be truly free."
Amid the conversation it came down to Kima wanting to bring out her rage, the deep down emotions that he thought were festering and would cause her to eventually become a monster.
She said it at last. Faced with the feelings he brought up and unable to outright attack him despite his attempt to give her his vampire bite, and to ravage her.. though to be honest she'll always doubted he'd be able to truly do it and perhaps it's that knowing that kept her from reaching the limits of her rage.. she got to the crux of things.
"Look at ME! What's inside me can be angry.. can kill. I KNOW That! But to remind me? To imply? To hint or say outright! And your intent? To tame me! I was fighting YOU! Not ME!
"...and I am looking at you, i have always been! and why not say it?! you cant HIDE it forever! i was not taming, but helping you! I pulled your anger up to the surface so you could not let it fester any longer!"
"HIDE WHAT?! What do you THINK I'm hiding! But the anger's at YOU! Dont' you understand! It's there... because of the choice YOU made! Maybe I haven't accepted and forgiven.. but that's not anger at myself! That's not some beast tryin' to escape. I was lashing out at you! Just you! Because of what YOU do to me! Because of what YOU did to me THEN!"
What happened after was a painful discussion. Blame. He stressed that what had happened before was due, in his opinion, to her selfishness. That the fault was just as much hers as it was Cel's. Blue did her best to make him understand, to see her viewpoint but in the end he walked away. He wouldn't admit he had any blame at all.
Two men.
She clung to both through everything and now she'd lost them both once more.
A Possibility but just that
Another man stepped into her life. Iggy (The Cobalt Streak). But he, himself, had his own issues to deal with. A current relationship being the most noticeable one. Blue, though deeply interested, pushed him aside until he took care of things. She hoped he'd come to her. Exploring a new relationship sat in her mind but she focused on everything but it, seeking out distractions. After what happened with Kima and Cel and the incidents in the past with Ramon and various others, she'd become bound and determined not to be in that role again.
"You almost make me forget her."
She would not be hurt. And this new man, though attracted as she was to his personality and looks, would not be allowed to cause that hurt.
Expecting rejection she tried to hide her hope.
After some time passed, he came back. Having ended his other relationship he came back to her. Still not sure if he wanted a relationship the two spent time together, neither bringing up just what their relationship was or would be. Blue worked to hold herself in check, his actions and words suggesting he cared for her more deeply than just good friends. But she didn't know and she didn't ask.
Some still asked her out. Sometimes she agreed. No exclusiveness. Did she want to be in a relationship? Did he?
Stalemates and truces
Sometimes you can't seem to win and going home is the best option. Sometimes setting things right takes time but eventually it needs done.
Compounding the Loss
Running into Roe at Pocket D, Blue was informed that The Silvermoon Pub and Inn was closing. After her immediate fear of harm to Sully, X and the Pups was set aside it was determined that they would be leaving for Ireland, returning home after the recent fire that had burned the building to the ground. The old home gone they would be leaving without rebuilding.
This has left a slight hole in her heart but she wishes the best for that couple who'd been lovers, friends and family to her. Their driving force in her life at a time when she needed it will never be forgotten.
There are still a few, such as Roe, who remain close from the Pub. But only a few are in contact. Roe, Cel and now Jason, with whom she's had a few conversations at the D. At first he was angry, blaming Blue for what had been done in the past. But he's apologized and their friendship is renewing.
The New Moon Pub and Inn, run by Zeta Foxx, has sprouted up. A lot of the old Pub members have moved their affiliations to there. Blue hasn't, and won't.
That part of her life... has passed.
Old Business
Blue and Don spoke in the D. While there are those individuals under the Giordano banner who have made their hatred plain, he's not one of them. They've come to an agreement. They wont' hate each other. Nothing more. Nothing less.
Lace, and his girlfriend Leda, talk with her in the D, remaining friends with her. Once she's seen Rex. The hug he gave her almost brought tears to her eyes. The big shark always seemed to set her mind at ease, making life seem simple.
Blue does her best to avoid the rest. Her few tries at renewing friendships and checking on those, such as Ryu, that she still cares for have caused more heartache than anything.
Though she did run into Blake, and he was his usual self.
It still goes on
As it always does.
Pushing away
Theme: "Weight of the World" by Evanescence
It became too much.
She'd finally pushed him away, still angry. Yet he'd contacted her mind. Some battle with an Oni that he had supposedly been fighting with the sole purpose of protecting her. At least that's what Kima said. Working with some of her friends she felt the pull, then saw glimpses. Slipping into his mind, into where they were, she was discovered and despite her desire to help, to set him free, he refused. His reasoning? Since he hadn't been able to get Blue to reach her rage and release it.. it was his duty to submit to the Oni. She watched as he was pulled away willingly and her mind lost contact.
Later, taken over by the Oni, she confronted him.. it... in the D. She challenged and they fought in Nerva, her chosen battlefield. Pushed to her limits she defeated the oni. Taking the only option, a split second sharing of EVERYTHING of each other, she freed him. But he didn't get all of her. Her mind, so strong and dependent on secrecy, refused. But all of his rammed itself into her. Overwhelmed and torn because of the affects of her mindwalking, she could barely move, barely think.
She was beaten down and begged to be let go. He wanted her to stay. He needed her. But the circle.. the neverending return to something that destroyed her every time.. frightened her.
"Let me go. Please."
She begged but it was hard to fight it. A friend she hated and felt for at the same time. Someone she wanted to help and had helped, but someone who blamed her and hurt her at every turn.
It took Kris finding her to remove her from Kima's influence. The woman carried off Blue like a child, comforting and making sure she didn't fall into the trap yet again.
Later, Blue sought him out. Finding him again in Nerva she confronted him. He felt betrayed because behind her was Kris. But she didn't care. She couldn't. Her friend's strength gave her the courage and determination to push him away one last time. For good.
They are no longer speaking or in contact.
More friends and some work thrown in
She's gone on one date since Ira. Watching The Dark Knight followed by dancing at the Monkey Club with Brian. Just dancing, skinny dipping and friendship. Not that he hasn't tried! Blue made it perfectly clear they wouldn't be dating and that she wouldn't sleep with him, despite his offering "friends with benefits". That's just not who she is anymore.
Another man she's found she enjoys talking too and being around is Zarp Draken. She considers him one of her closest friends.
Blue and Cel have managed to strike a truce. It's obvious he still loves her. She still pushes him away. Despite that.. the friendship is there. For now.
Sent to her by Zarp was Byleth, also known as Zoey Walkers. The young girl, desperately trying to get over some of her past- issues in her mind- came to Blue. Blue stepped in, mindwalking for her and weaving over memories in order to fade their potency. It was draining as always but the whole ordeal brought the two into a friendship and it was well worth it. Life experience and Blue's own ease with being honest and up front made it easy for them to share on a level as psions and as females.
You're WHO?
Twice.
Within days.
Praetorian and a stalemate
A random spotting of someone who looked like Iggy but wasn't. A confrontation. Ignatius. The Burgundy Streak. A praetorian pretending to be him. Or rather.. not pretending but not correcting when it came to causing trouble and letting it look like Iggy's doing it. She left that meeting completely frustrated and a bit worried. She made sure to tell Iggy as soon as she could.
When she did it led to more things he couldn't tell her. But his desire to do so brought pain as he fought a Geas that'd been put on him. So many things he couldn't confirm. Even his own child.
During the discussion Blue attempted to help, stepping into his mind. But she was forced out and the incident left them with no answers. Both were weak and spent the night just sitting on the floor of the Garage talking and being close.
A Revenant clone
A random attack. A coincidence. Something attacked Blue as she walked out of a building where she'd just met with a friend. Black tar-ish tentacles that threatened to cover her. She fought back and mental games began. It instilled fear: making her see one of her greatest fears... Fenrir. Yet she pushed it away and within minutes the man.. the thing.. wass lying terrorized in HIS mind.
Even though he'd attacked her.. she ded what she could.. mindwalking. But she was stalemated and sent away. She was in pain and drained from the intense mental fights.
What followed was a discussion. It took some effort at times, because while vulnerable she'd seen something confusing. He had the face of Zarp Draken and.... he'd been naked.. completely exposed.
Her worry for this "creature" overrode where her mind went and she learned, short and sweet, that he needed to feed. Or rather the dark thing inside him did. On fear. So she made a choice. She let him use her: Letting him back inside to bring out Fenrir again. But it wasn't for long. That fear was too powerful and she pulled herself out. Exhausted he flew her to Nerva where she recuperated.
A few days later they met again and he told her who he was.
Terror Born. A Revenant Clone.. with incomplete memories.. Zarp's memories. After some discussion the two came to terms: She won't tell her friend of his existence and he'll be careful about who he feeds from, with her keeping an eye on him closely. That is something she's still continuing to do.
Before there's a chance
Theme: "Arms Of An Angel" by Sarah McLachlan
The Cobalt Streak died. That chance that might have been there for Blue was gone. Despite their closeness nothing had been clarified. Her small hope forced to fizzle.
Should she hope that, just like Cel, he'd come back from the dead? If he did what'd change? Would there still BE a chance? And if there is... will she want it?
Frustrated. Angry.
But a friend offered comfort, held her and his friendship began to mean more than he could know as the world threw yet more at her.
Zarp offered her the chance to go to the Private Wake with him. With assistance from Mr. Zen, she got approval and indeed she stepped over on July 31st. Together they took a jeep, her driving, and the carefree journey began. Despite the heaviness of the loss of someone close to both of them they were brought together by it.
Once in Boston it was conversation and just "being" that took precedence. Amazingly, Blue chose being with him to hitting the clubs for dancing the night away. And the entire night is what they had. She couldn't sleep. No portable dampener for her mental abilities meant no sleep. He chose to stay awake with her and she was more than grateful. Though if he had chosen to sleep she'd have stayed and kept his sleeping form company.
Even as the night went by the next day was still there... looming.
When the night finally ended and the morning came they readied themselves.
The wake. She attended with Zarp by her side.
And when it was over, another night was spent in Boston. More time together and then back they went.
The Isles... still waited.. was still the same.. as always and with more to do. Now she faced those Isles with one less friend.
Yet she returned with another friendship stronger because of it.
Continuing
Step by step.
A young girl
A new friend. Prudence (Feral Duelist) stepped into Blue's life, coming over to talk every chance she seemed to find. A sixteen year old in need of someone... someone to push her to accept herself and who she is.
Holding her close in a hug, Blue purred. The feelings of being a mother renewed.. of being a sister to someone in need. Just like with the girls she takes care of.. this girl asleep in her arms needed her. It brought tears to her eyes as she hummed along with the purr.. the purr that matched the girl's purr as well.
She also met Sable, Prudence's girlfriend. A wonderful artist she's done a very detailed sketch of Blue and given it to her. Blue has plans to give it to someone, eventually.
Of course with anyone who's like your child, there are issues. A teenager, attention is important. To the older woman's chagrin, Prudence has a hard time dealing with how popular Blue is. This has led to more than one argument.
The list of Friends goes on
Helen is a bit quiet but seems smart and the CD of her playing the Violin has become one of Blue's favorites. Arbiter Fabulous is not a friend but he's a hilarious ball of entertainment. His fashion tips, especially to those who don't want them, are great to listen to. Despite the fact that he hates how Blue dresses she can't help but smile when he comes around. Ten. His Kokology, a game of analyzation, Blue finds fun. Even if, for her, he's only ever about 50% right. Rath is someone she just can't help but try to frustrate. The guy is always after some girl and causing trouble. But, just like the Arbiter, he's entertaining. For a puppy. Matt is interesting to talk to and the two have offered their help to each other should the need come up. Blue took Justin to Nerva to show him the cliffs, water and hot tubs that make that place one of her favorites. He's become a friend she thinks of almost as a little brother type guy. Will is another friend she's found fun to be around.
An evening in the D. Pierce approached her, drawn to her for some reason. He's not much of a talker but seems thoughtful. Zoe wowed them with simple tricks. Blue laughed like she hadn't in a good long time and that was needed more than anything. Zoey learned abit about Blue's past and they made plans to talk again soon. The young girl was happy to learn that Blue is very adept at sign language. Henry and Kale kept up a delightful and interesting conversation. Both seemed interested in Blue's life. Kale, probably moreso due to his job as a journalist. Henry was surprised to learn that Blue knew members of the Foundation. They've made plans to work in the Warzone together someday. Ray kept them company as well. Later, Sir Templeton Montebank with his British accent and Victorian way of speaking brought an even bigger smile to Blue's face.
The Battlefield
More time in the Warzone. Some of this is to work alongside Zarp. The rest is to test herself and to add yet another aspect to what she does.
Though she'll admit that the Rikti are not her best opponents. Their mentalists go toe to toe with her and it's often when she's dealing with them that swords slash, catching her. Yet she continues to return, wounds or not.
She's met a few others, working beside them for Lady Grey. Some she'd met before: Jet and Suzy. Others were new: Nigel and Healer. Jet she'd met while enjoying some time in the D, him being a part of the Foundation as well as a friend to Zarp and an acquaintance of Kris's. Nigel piqued her interest with his odd conspiracies, beliefs and seeming knowledge of something Blue'd never heard of. Pornomancy. Considering he mentioned it dealt with the following of certain actresses in the adult entertainment industry she's hoping to talk with him again. Could there be a pornomancer somewhere using her movies to perform rituals and spells?
To Interfere?
She hadn't spoken to Kaldius in a long time. But he did so again and this time she found he had a new servant. A twelve year old girl. Ryanne.
Frustrated by someone so young giving herself to an Incubus and what he might ask beyond murder from her, Blue wished she could do something.
His words? "A canvas". What would he paint? What would that little girl have to go through?
Blue told him she'd be watching and if she saw a chance she'd help get the girl away from him. His response was to step close, place a hand on her shoulder and release that sexual aura held by an Incubus.
"...Dear... Don't take what is mine.. and I won't take what is yours."
He left her then, overcome and shaking as she sat against the wall. Ryanne came to her a bit later. After Blue assured the girl that she didn't need to go to the hospital she asked her one thing. To promise that she'd seek out Blue if she needed anything, anything at all.
Despite the fear of having to face Kaldius, if it came down to it.. she'd defend Ryanne.
Later, while she was talking with Zarp, Kaldius approached her again. This time with a question. He wanted some of the sex videos she'd made in her previous career so that he could show Ryanne. The young girl was curious about sex. Blue refused. For her lack of cooperation he told Blue he'd be the one teaching the twelve year old.
Blue asked and nearly begged but it made no difference and she was at a loss as to what to do. She watched them walk away.
[OOC NOTE: I do NOT support or encourage any actions in COX that involve children and sex. The above incident bothered not only my character but the player as well. It is a sad fact that I could do nothing to stop it.]
A game of pretend
Theme: "I'm a Bitch" by Meredith Brooks
Brian had showed up at the D. The flirtatious conversation upset Cel, who gripped his sword and made it clear he'd like to take on the other man. In fact, he asked Blue in her mind if she wanted him to kill the Robot man. Of course Blue wasn't up for that. This led to what can only be described as something that made Blue feel like a complete piece of property being fought over. She left angrily with Kris by her side.
Later, at a gathering of friends in the D yet again, Cel arrived. When Blue came back from the restroom Kris was holding Cel's sword. Her eyes went around to everyone and she had her assumptions as to what that meant. Using mindspeak there came yet another argument. She shouldn't flirt so openly in front of him, she should tell him her name.
This conversation tore her up and she did her best to hide that fact as she served drinks and spoke to her friends.
Pretend.
It ended with him saying he'd never speak to her again. He'd just watch and hope she doesn't explode.
He's said that before.. and he's always come back. But each time the heartache is worse, the words more painful. She can't stop being herself. The woman he thinks she is, the woman he claims to love... there's nothing she can say or do to dissuade him or to make him understand that he sees through a glass darkly.
A name and wings that hold her tight
When you're a woman as popular as Blue and with a past such as hers it's not a wonder when there are men and women clamoring over each other to have sex with you. The number of those seriously considering a serious relationship is a list far shorter. Those who are allowed close, to see beyond the real “Blue” to the true name beneath it, are very few. Of those friends who know her, a handful have been given the trust of seeing far deeper than most. Even Sully and Fiesty don't know her name. Don knew. There were times she regretted having told him and other times when knowing she'd taken that step lightened that fear inside. If she'd done it before.. she could again.
Cel had reminded her. He didn't know her name. He never would. But he'd reminded her of its importance, of the difference it could make.
That reminder seemed pertinant as a man had stepped into her life who she felt would know her name... should know her name. In time.
A sexy draconian older than her with a teasing grin and more levels and secrets to him than she'd ever expect.
It'd started out as the usual friendship. Flirting and laughing at the surface things of life but it'd eventually moved to conversation. Not the simple conversation but what's below that. Feelings, thoughts, questions and ... it'd come to include a shared experience: the death of a man that one had seen as a hero above the rest and the other had seen as a simple man. It'd brought them closer than either had considered.
No sex, no pressure and no demands. Not that they weren't physically attracted to each other. To say they weren't would be a bold faced lie. But it wasn't a priority, it wasn't a necessity and to be honest it wasn't a possibility. Their's was a friendship and he was in a relationship. Some of the initial bringing together was conversation concerning his relationship with Faith. Blue had met her once. A night of fun and frolic had come about when, just a bit drunk, the woman instigated a round of kisses amongst the members of the small group gathered. It was Faith and Sasha who'd insisted Zarp and Blue kiss then. Some might say that's what set things off and it might have. But in Blue's eyes, it didn't. She'd tell the truth and say that he was a damn good kisser but beyond that he was just a friend.
After Boston and attending the wake for Iggy, they realized something. Maybe at the same time, maybe not, but they discovered there were feelings there. For her it was like with Iggy yet again. A man in a relationship that was having troubles. Her standing on the outside, waiting. She made no demands. She'd been there before. If he chose to continue to move forward with Faith then she'd be beside him as his friend. If he chose to end it with Faith, then she'd be there if he wished to share a part of her life. It was hard. Blue could tell no one of the struggle inside herself. Other than Zarp and her, there was no one in the world that knew what was going on in either of their minds. And it went on. Their friendship continued to grow as they spent time together. Talking. Fighting Rikti. Dancing. Hanging out with mutual and new friends. Eventually Blue told Kris. But only her.
Things moved on as a decision was come to and then more waiting as action was waited upon.
Then it was there. He was there with wings that held her tight against the storms.
No electricity, no fireworks. Honesty amid secrets. Joys amid hard decisions. Fears amid laughter. A shared life of pretend, of masks that rise and fall even with each other. Blue's scared and happy. She knows that in his long life he's known others like her, that despite the uniqueness she feels it's only a little in a great span of time to him. Yet with him things.... fit.
It was left to him to make it known. And he did. Immediately there were repercussions as his friends learned and began to make the adjustment. Zarp and Blue, not Zarp and Faith. There were also interrogations. Kelsey in particular believed herself to have a vested interest in the specifics of the whole matter after being the one to comfort Faith in the aftermath. They answered the questions, whether there was a right to them or not, with all the honesty they could offer.
Together and alone they stood against it all.
As they stand she waits and considers. Her name. Will it be something she can share with him?
So much every day
Things go by, cropping up. Little things that mean a lot and big things that don't mean quite so much. Who's to tell which is which?
A lead and kindred spirits?
During a gathering of friends in the D, the praetorian of Iggy showed up. Blue's response was one of anger and frustration. A reminder of him and standing as some twisted version alive and well when the real man lay dead. However, he had information to give. Arbiter Radcliff. The untimely death of him on the heals of Iggy's death was suspect. Her thank you was there but quietly given. What is she to make of him and of the information? He'd given them something freely but was there more to it? What was his purpose behind it? Whether Zarp's trusting him or not, she doesn't. Of those gathered she was the only one in the Isles, the only one on that side. Usually one to go right into things she was at a loss as to where to go and what to do.
Friends, like a brother. Not a younger brother but a brother nonetheless. They've hit it off pretty well. She and Henry have spent time working in the Warzone together. Not a well oiled machine just yet but they get by, at least enjoying each other's company. Includes plenty of trips to the Vanguard medbay. They've discussed plenty and continue to enjoy the beginning of their friendship.
Make that two young girls
Prudence seems to have comes to terms, for now, with the level of attention she'll receive from Blue. Arguments and frustrations, teenage tantrums and selfishness have come in to play time and again. But the friendship is there. In fact, the sixteen year old girl has taken to calling Blue "Mom". A label and one Blue holds close, though outwardly it's not apparent. Her own daughter having never grown up and not being one to be around little ones, save Sully and X's pups, she's taken the responsibility to heart. Yet she's herself. The D is their common ground as Prudence lives in Paragon. Blue'd have this no other way.
Zoey has also come to mean a great deal to Blue, in the way of a daughter. This has surprised Blue, usually dealing with people on a level far more sexual than maternal. Though Zoey doesn't call her "Mom" it hasn't stopped the older woman from acting similar to an older sister looking out for her younger sister in motherly way.
Yet more friends and plannin' a party
Theme: "Do you believe in Magic" by Ali & AJ
The quiet Deus turned out to have a bit in common with her. His feelings on combat stirred up some of that Felix desire for the hunt. His mannerisms and gentlemanly ways made her feel very at ease and it's possible they could become good friends. She's made a few new acquantances. One of them is another Brian. She didn't talk to him much. The other was Ashley. There wasn't much time to talk to the woman but Blue hopes they'll speak again. Rubix was quiet, hanging on the outskirts, but she's thinking she'll try and get him to talking a bit more next time he's around. A little six inch creature by the name of Lady made a very entertaining appearance as did Rick (Ascendant). Blue didn't know him from any other hero, though the name sounded familiar. He seemed like a nice guy.
She was surprised to meet someone she'd known in the past. Ida Phoenix from the days long past when she was first in Rogue and then at the beginning of the change she made in her life. Zarp seemed to find the banter between the two quite interesting. Petite was another from the past she speaks with occasionally.
Val, a young girl with a healthy amount of excitement joined her and others on the dance floor. Rick she only spoke to for a few minutes. Kireme was someone she worked with once but plans to again. For hire he took her desire to avoid lethal measure easily, as long as he got paid. There's more to him and she'd like to find out. Raquelle had a bit of trouble relaxing and didn't stay long. Ishmitul also seems to be hanging around. Tigira, a creature seemingly made in the image of someone named Lanara that Blue hasn't met yet, has also surfaced.
Orion found her one morning in the D. A vampire, she enjoyed the conversation. Not to mention his way of speaking and almost adorable compliments. He did however remind her a bit of Kima, bringing to mind the few times Kima had had to bite her.. with her permission.. in order to heal himself.
Addramalech is always good for interesting conversation. He makes her think and she likes that.
With all these friends it only makes sense she'd throw a party. This one? For her twenty-sixth birthday. She's planning to hold it in the D on Wednesday August 27th. Starting in the evening and going on for as long as she continues to have people wanting to enjoy the night with her.
Gone and back again
Just like in baseball, sometimes there are curveballs.
Knowing
Theme: "My Best Friend's Girl" by The Cars
Zarp came to her with heavy words. A spirit.. Iggy's spirit.. had had unfinished business and they'd talked. He and Zarp. They'd talked about a few things and one of them had been Blue.
"You may have never sorted through your -own- feelings on him... But Ignatius Byron loves you."
The shock hit her hard and she couldn't help but look away. Eyes ran the gamut of her emotions. Iggy had loved her. She hadn't been sure, hadn't know. Even giving herself to him physically she hadn't known his feelings. Then he'd been gone and now.. now he'd said and not to her but to the man she'd become involved with! Trembling, growling, tears... everything was there and she listened as Zarp recounted some of what had been discussed between them.
So much said in so few words.
Zarp... afraid he was replacing Iggy for her. The feeling of losing everything threatened to pull her down and she had to ask herself in those few moments, the same question. Though she'd asked it more than once as the relationship had begun building. But even in death The Cobalt Streak had words for his friend. Zarp should be honest with himself and find something of his own. Not everything could be done in the name of the fallen.
And with an embracing of wings, gentle touch and a sincere kiss it was obvious. Her.
Iggy wanted her to be happy. Was she?
Her eyes met Zarp's and she knew she was. With him she was. And a sob escaped. There was always something, so much confusion and frustration. What would she have said to Iggy if he'd come to her in death?
She was sorry. Always sorry as someone was hurt by her choices. It'd taken Iggy till death to know of his love. Blue hadn't been sure what her feelings were. Then Zarp had appeared, though he'd been there even while Iggy was still alive. Friends and then the shared tragedy and he'd become such an important part of her life.
Being honest with herself? What she had... with Zarp.. was what she wanted.
She told him so. Her actions would have to show the truth of those words.
Love. Something so hard.
Blue's glad she knows, glad she knows now that she had been loved, is loved even if in death. Iggy has a place in her heart and always will. No matter the feelings this has brought she's glad.
Rewind
The night when Zarp showed up in the Isles. A night together that's interrupted by the words, "The Cobalt Streak is in the medbay. Alive."
Unbelievable? Not really. Hadn't Kima and Cel done this to her before? Shouldn't she be use to this?
Stepping over the threshold of the Foundation once again she accompanied him to its medbay where people have gathered. But it's not him, it's not the Iggy she knew. In fact, this Iggy doesn't remember her at all. Or anything from the last year.
Not him...
She did well. She'd tell you she did well. Pretend. Yet the anger and sorrow was almost overwhelming. So soon after hearing he'd loved her and coming to terms with it, he's given back and ripped away again. A visual and physical reminder but even more so by the lack! The lack of everything!
Her reactions, somehow felt or noticed by some, couldn't help but lead to questions. She answers them honestly but that game of pretend is going strong. Arty noticed as did Lanara. Though she told them the basics she didn't go into details.
Follow that up with another conversation with Burgs, his praetorian, and toss in an incubus and timestamp storage with more talk with Iggy.
Iggy is dead and there's another in his stead. An Iggy of the past. A man deserving to be alive but not their Iggy. Not her Iggy. His glasses, technology recording everything of his life, will reveal everything in time. She'll have to wait until then to discuss it with him. If she does.
Nothing has changed as far as her relationship with Zarp. Iggy is dead. Perhaps she'll be friends with this new "him" eventually but first things must be sorted out in her own head.
Still? How?
Blue sits in the D. It's late and there's some papers she's looking at. Then Iggy's there. The Cobalt Streak is asking and wondering just what had happened to him before his return. Right there, so close, it's him but not to her. Her Iggy is dead and the reminder still hits hard.
Then they talk. She tells him. He compares. He's hurting and she can see it but so is she.
"I really did lose everything."
Her words. 'No claim". There's confusion in her eyes and anger.
She slaps him and to slap him means that he stood and took it. After all he's far too fast to be caught by the strike of a woman. "What do you want?" She says with tears in her eyes as she sees his misery. What she wants is for him to step back from being that Iggy from before to being the Iggy he is now.. making new friends, beginning a new life, forgetting what he's lost.
He's accepting. That's what he says. It comes rushing at her. He's accepting that someone he loved is with someone else, ignoring the fact that it's Zarp who held him in such respect and how it happened. Then the tears fall. He'd been dead, Zarp had talked with his spirit. Things had been settled and... and then he tells her.
Once, just once, he'd say it.
The man he is now, not the memory, that Iggy loves Blue.
"I'm sorry." That's all the words she can say and they just don't seem enough.
He holds her. The first time for him and it feels like goodbye as she buries her face in his neck and sobs in his arms. "Don't be. Just be happy. That's all anyone needs to be."
There hadn't been time to build and she couldn't, wouldn't, end what she had with Zarp. This tore at her, breaking her heart. The shaking of her sobs finally quieted and she looked to him. "Please... be happy too? If anythin'... be happy too."
He'd try.
She stepped away and it was as if she'd said goodbye to him, to the man she might have loved if ..only. Yet they continued to talk for a few minutes and it felt... right? okay? She asked if he wanted her to stay away and he said there'd be no point. So she'll be his friend. More than most she knows that this IS Iggy. She'll never make the mistake again of thinking of them as two separate entities. She understands better.
Sorrow is there but maybe some closure?
Choices and Consequences
For everything you choose there is so much more than what you see or feel. And often what you see isn't what's there? Or is it? With every choice you have to accept what could or will happen because of it.
Inner Turmoil
A conversation with Deus offers only more questions and less answers and leaves Blue grasping at something inside.
He says one will die
Theme: "The Pretender" by Foo Fighters
The question of clones led Blue to seek out Terror Born again. Having become close to Zarp, at least by virtue of being in a relationship with him, she couldn't help but feel he deserved the right to know of his clones existence. Terror disagreed.
All his memories up to that last month or so have led him to believe that if he finds out then Zarp will come after him and one of them will die. Blue trusts Zarp and wants to offer help to Terror but instead the words are heated and growling fills the air. Masks. Pretend. What does she know? Is one layer lifted to only reveal a new layer of something she can't trust? Is the man she's giving herself too something she doesn't know or are the glimpses he's given honest and true?
And what of her pretend? What of the faces she shows to him? To others? To herself?
Reminders of her insignificance. Reminders that everything can or will mean nothing in the grand scheme of time he's had and will have. Inconsequential.
He's adamant one will die.
Finally, at a loss of words, all she can do was run.
She ran to Nerva. To the waters that are her haven. There she thought and ultimately called Zarp to join her. He had to know.
After her wording made it sound for a moment like she was seeing someone else she clarified. He had a clone. His response was to go after him, to FIND him. But Blue held him still, asked him to stay. He remained and in that instant he was just as Terror had been when fighting his urge to attack her.
The Rikti attacked as they were talking and, per Zarp's request, they took shelter after a short battle. He didn't want to see her get hurt. And then THAT conversation was interrupted by an odd fellow who seemed to think Zarp was his liege.
What an odd, odd day.
Birthday Party
Blue wanted a party. So she had one. Old friends and new friends showed up to wish her a Happy Birthday. Some stayed and chatted. Others had to leave quickly. Roe was the first to arrive. This friend who Blue thinks of as her sister on a feral, animal level.. someone who knows her past in the Pub more than most.. gave her a treasure. A silver bullet on a chain with a slight magical charge. The significance is that Roe wears one given to her by a friend. It's meant to be inscribed with the names of friends and to get you through dark times as a reminder of "why we do what we do". Blue already has plans to inscribe it with two names. It's good to note that to aid in getting her through the dark it's had a glow spell put on it. When worn and willed to it'll give off ten feet of light. Tristan showed up next. A new friend working for the same goals as the Garage they'd met only a few days before when she sought him out of the shadows. She was very glad to see him come join the group gathered. Rhiannon showed up next with a 17th century bottle of Champagne for the occasion.
Zoey was the next to make an appearance bearing hugs galore. Of course Kris was there! And Henry came just like he'd promised. Showing off his magician's talents he presented Blue with flowers and later, after some teasing about pants vs. no pants, his goggles.
MANCRUSH stopped by twice to give her one big, sweaty, nasty hug. He also gave her a Rob Zombie CD and an I <3 Posty sticker. His randomness was good for quite a good laugh.
Prudence offered up a thought which Blue caught as well as sent a birthday card which Blue received later the next day. The "I love you, Mom's" made her smile and meant a great deal. Matthew dropped by for a moment to offer his best wishes. Huna came next. A young girl, a reported fan of Blue's, with a beautiful voice. Living with one of the women Blue helped get out of the Isles she'd heard about her and joined the group to the delight of everyone.
Brian showed up long enough to say hi and to drop of a cake that was all sorts of chocolate. That was dished up along with the champagne and all was delicious. Irandi showed up as they were deciding NOT to play truth or dare with the particular mix of those there. She gave Blue a pendant. The circlet was of a yingyang: one part Ivory Tiger and the other part Onyx Dragon. Instead of putting this on as a necklace she removed the circlet from its coord and attached it to the leather cord on her ankle. Still down with life kicking her ass, Irandi was a bit quiet and aloof but Blue was glad she came. Huna gave a performance of two songs she'd written and they were done well. Kris left to go get things ready for the girl's night she and Blue had planned. She left just as they began a game of Questions.
Everyone asked one question. Henry was a bit ornery and snuck around the rules but Blue will get a real question out of him some other time. After one round Blue had to run. Time for Kris and her to have some fun. Taking the Champagne and leaving the cake-- there would be food at the apartment for sure-- she passed out hugs and off she went, her presents going with her.
Kris gave her a leather jacket that night and took her for a ride on her motorcycle. Blue wore Henry's gift and it was all the more special as the sped away with her arms tight around the beautiful woman in front of her. Best friends being carefree.
Zarp's gift was given quickly that day. He had somewhere to be and couldn't attend the party. She'd rather of had him there but she understood commitments and things needing done when they do. His gifts? He'd crafted himself, a ring. Steel blue in color, and kind of plain. When warmed (as in, hot body temp), draconic runes will appear around the outside. In the limited time he'd had he'd told her playfully that the phrase is "Wux Aritov". He did not explain what it means. Perhaps the one other speaker of draconic she knows could tell her? He also got her a potato. A gift that he'd told her he'd be getting her. A recommendation from Addramalech.
Calamity
Theme: "Resident Evil(Instrumental)
It was the first day in a week that Blue had seen Zarp beyond the few moments he'd had to deliver her Birthday gift. Enjoying some time relaxing they were interrupted with an emergency.
Terror Born informed them via a phone call to Lane's Garage that he had hostages on the Ferry Calamity. They rallied together. He'd kill them if they didn't stop him. Kris, Zarp, Angie, Mission, Shelly, Katie, Jake and Blue. The broke into two. Overt and Covert.
Covert was Shelly, Kris and Blue. They went in by water. Cuvier was the shark creature Blue came up against there while the others made it to the ship. But the animal wanted to play and to hunt so it went for the ship and began to toy with them, feeding on the hostages. Kris worked at disarming the bombs and was able to do so despite the fear and Cuvier's attempts to stop her. Shelly and Blue took on Cuvier, who eventually ran once Mission showed up to help and Katie made her way down below.
Overt was Zarp, Jake, Angie, Mission and Katie. They went in directly and face immediately an ice cannon. Most of the weapons seemed crystal based and that cannon seemed to sap and slow Zarp. But they managed to take it down. Terror responded... his fear feeding blackness pulling, at least some of it, away and taking over the crystal column in the middle of the ship. It increased the fear, bold and determined that it's psychic tasting of everyone's fear would be rewarded.
It injured Angie, who still fought with her bots. It engulfed Mission who became again the Chaos Doll- a woman of fire and not ice- the other part of her that Blue had first met and contained the year before. This time it offered Blue it's mind as the hand like blackness was focused primarily on the mind of Mission. Blue fought back through that connection and it disregarded its defenses, allowing them to take it down. Blue shut down Mission's mind, putting her to sleep.
Zarp and Terror fought. Equal until Zarp turned the tide. When he did so, Terror stabbed Zarp and the poison- Dragonsbane- began to turn his own magic against him. The Slaughter King, someone they'd never met or heard of, appeared. He called Zarp Kavatsva and Prince and though he bragged about what he'd done and came for he was upset to find they'd bested and destroyed it all. Taking Terror with him he disappeared, teleporting away. But not before pushing Zarp into the water.
During all of this Blue fought her fears. She struggled, at times frozen solid, but she knew what must be done. Fighting beside Zarp was where she wanted to be but going covert she was able to save a few hostages. Though she tried to give Zarp an edge- oh so familiar to the fight between Kima and Cel the year before- she found she could do nothing. It was obvious they were in a fight to the death. This was disheartening. She'd truly believed that Zarp wouldn't desire to kill him. However, that was before this, before he'd taken innocents and let them be used and killed. When Zarp went into the water she went after him. She was weakened, having had to slip into mindwalking mode to ensure Mission's safety and help take on that creature of fear.
Eventually those injured were taken care of. Zarp, unconscious, was put into the medbay at the Foundation. Jade created an item to block the flow of his magic, which would break the cycle of the poison and let him heal naturally. Blue stayed by his side throughout that day and was there when he woke up.
Entrusting
Zarp woke up and there was a long discussion. Being close, talking about what had happened. It was during that time that Blue made the choice. Secrets. They had them. Yet Blue gave up one of hers for him. Her name. Quietly, in the Foundation medbay, she whispered to him her name. He didn't expect it but she gave it, trusting him to keep it private. In return he told her what the inscription on the ring he'd given her was. In draconic it said I love you. Her heart raced and fear crept in for just a moment.
Love.
Blue said the words back to him. This was different than with Don. Stronger, deeper and built on experience and being their for each other. Similar people who'd come to enjoy each other in so many ways.
Her name and a declaration. Every moment treasured. Blue's life is but a drop in the bucket for him but there must be something for him to give like that. She clings to that belief.
Just keep swimming, swimming...
Eventually Blue found that she was aching to do more. With the Zenvious Foundation closing its doors she finally took the next step. Two in fact.
Going Global
Theme: "Concrete Angel" by Martina McBride
Shutting down The Garage, Kris decided to move to Dubai. Here she'd be more free to use her robots for the good and not resigned to living in the Rogue Isles. Not to mention the job offer she got was pretty nice. With the thought that, just like Shy, Blue might be losing another friend to better circumstances she up and made her own decision. She'd go with Kris. Knowing this would change things on the Safehouse front she set out to get things arranged. What was the arrangement? Simple enough. She'd take her plan global. With all the horror out in the world there were bound to be places where safehouses were needed, where women and young girls would need help finding a fresh start- sometimes outside of the law.
How did it work out? Splendidly. Headquarters in Dubai, Blue now oversees and maintains safehouses in eight countries. That number will no doubt rise. She's gathered plenty of others to her cause and is very happy with the turn her life has taken.
Keep it Going
Always ready for adventure and new explorations, Zarp accompanied Blue to Dubai. She split her time living in her own place with him and staying with Kris whenever Zarp was off on his own or visiting back in Paragon. A permanent fixture in her life she finds herself utterly swept away with their relationship. Though he still has his secrets they've only strengthened their bond. Of course she still wonders about her place in his grand scheme but she's happy and for her that's what matters. This happiness is something she'd only brushed on with the others. She keeps him involved with her work, as well, finding that sometimes a word from him can save her hours of time. He's charming, what can she say. Of course, she makes time to travel with him, seeing the world and experiencing life first hand.
Wedding Bells
Theme: "My Baby Loves Me" by Martina McBride
It came as a surprise to Blue the day Zarp asked her to marry him. A relationship built from the beginning it seemed to her that they just “were” and she'd accepted it as so in a way she never could have explained. However the yes took no thought to say. Life has been so busy it's almost just like the start of any other adventure. Blue's taken it in stride. They've become so close that the formality doesn't matter as much as it might have in the past. She'll continue to be herself and he'll do the same. It's a symbol, though, of which the importance isn't lost on her.
Then the wedding came. It was held in Dubai on February 17th, 2010. In attendance were Kris, Shy, Fiesty and the happy couple. Before the wedding Zarp took some time alone. Lighting candles and offering prayers he invited his ancestors to attend the ceremony. Blue, on the other hand, spent time cooking up a storm. The kitchen was full of laughter, a radio blasting and four women all enjoying themselves. They acted just like sisters and it only increased the sense of excitement that was filling the Bride. That afternoon she met up with Prosper for a small lunch at a nearby cafe. She'd asked him to perform the short ceremony. He'd agreed and they took the time together to catch up, she having missed him desperately. It'd taken so long to even find him again and now here he was officiating at one of the most important events in her life.
After her time with the girls and then with Prosper she took time alone. Just a few minutes. She was utterly happy but she felt the need to embrace the feelings the day brought, feelings about the first man she'd loved- her first husband- and her daughter, feelings about what had happened to them. Closing her eyes she told them she loved them but she knew they'd be glad she found joy in the life she had now and with who she was sharing it with. That was all the quiet time she needed. It was back to getting ready for the festivities.
The location for the wedding was in Safa Park.
Her dress was beautiful. Handmade it was white with blue thread interwoven. It had spaghetti straps and was split down both sides from the hip to the floor. She went barefoot. The girls had done up her hair with small blue flowers and those little bitty white flowers.
Prosper spoke in his own way, the way that Blue knew and respected and loved. Then Blue said her part- words of her own just for him- and that followed with Zarp doing the same.
Her words to him as she crossed her arms and gave him an ornery look were:
There sure've been a helluvalot of things in my past. Lovin's not been my strong point. Not in this sense. I'd forced myself for a long time not ta feel anythin' that'd touch my heart. When I changed my mind about that I wondered if it was worth it. Then there was you. I know you're not all mine in the grand scheme that's goin' on. But you're mine. Right now and for whatever time I'm allowed you're mine. All mine ta do with as I please. Despite all the shit we've had to conquer you're mine and I'm givin' what I can of myself ta you for the same damn thing. Ta do with as you please. That's no simple thing but I trust ya. I'm marryin' you because I trust ya to stand beside me, because I trust you to let me journey on a bit with you. I love you, Zarp Draken. I'm honored to be your wife.
He'd given her her ring on her birthday and she chose that as her wedding ring. It meant the most. She had a plain silver titanium ring made for him. Inside was written her name. Just that. Her first name. A reminder of what she'd given him.
Afterword they flew to the rooftop of the building that housed their home and Safehouse Headquarters. Staying in her wedding dress she became the hostess she's always been. Tons of food, lots of drinks, music and dancing.
The party lasted till late that night, till everyone headed off to sleep. Not Blue though. She does sleep now, with the inhibitor that Kris and Mike Mars fixed up, but not that night. That night was for flying, for smiles and being close and for watching the sun come up on the new day.
Reason to Return... again
It would take a lot to bring Blue back. While she visits occasionally a longer stay just might be in store.
A Hoped for Possibility
Since the wedding Blue's life hasn't changed much. She's still the same fun-loving person. She's still on the lookout for more places to build safehouses, enjoying married life and spending time with her best friend nearly every day. However a piece of mail happened to rest in her hands in late July. It seems with all her good work, and with a few people vouching for her, Paragon City is considering changing her status.
No longer a villain or rogue she would be a "Hero". While the label never stopped what she did it did cause some frustration, especially when the man she loved was a registered Hero. They had kept her out of Paragon (except for a few incidents with special circumstances), out of The Zenvious Foundation (Again, except for one or two occasions) and left her stuck in the Rogue Isles until she eventually left the United States completely.
Not that leaving wasn't for the best. It was. Many lives are being impacted by what she's accomplished. She's proud of what she's done and admits what she regrets but this... this possible opportunity could not be passed up.
Kept busy with things she could not leave undone, Blue sent Zarp on ahead without her, asking him to find out more if he could. She also figured he'd enjoy meeting up with old friends.
She followed him, arriving in town on August 6th. After a quick stop at the Safehouse she'd set up years before to see how things were doing Blue surprised Zarp in the D. She'd missed him and it was obvious he'd missed her. Needless to say it wasn't long until they flew off to spend some quality time together.
Familiar Ground
Most of Blue's days are spent dealing with the adminstrative duties of running her Safehouses. Back in the Rogue Isles she's personally checking on House One. Run by Tricia McKnight, a recently new addition, it's thriving. Blue could not be happier with her employee choice.
Her husband, Zarp, has been connecting once again with his old friends from the Zenvious Foundation. Though he was disappointed to find that the Keller family (Jade Ohm, Psi Monk and Little Miss Vagary) are still residing in Napal while Saint Helen has moved to the Vatican. Knowing how much they mean to him, Blue can only hope that he'll make more dear friends now that they've returned. It also means that a few more roadtrips will be in order.
Unfortunately being back also means running into those they might otherwise want to void. For Blue that list included Terror Born. The instigator of the Calamity attack she had put him to the back of her mind, focusing on the wonderful turn her life had taken. Until the two met up again in St. Martial a mere five days after her return. Looking exactly like Zarp she at first mistook Terror for her husband. After all things like changing wing/scales color and smoking are all things that the Dragon man might decide to do on a whim. Yet the presence was wrong. Confronting him about the Calamity and about the Vanguard Armor she'd correctly assumed he's stolen was on the verge of erupting into violence on her part. Being out of this life had shaken her control and patience with what she'd left behind. Lucky for Blue Kris showed up, her demeanor calming things in that endearing and wise manner she has about her.
By the time the three went their separate ways a deal had been made. Kris would develop a suit for Terror that would help combat the affects of the Xyclon-N. In order to study its structure while active Blue will let it feed off of her. After that, when the suit is delivered to him, he will then return Zarp's stolen suit. Blue is a little wary of doing all of this, and particularly about doing it without Zarp's knowledge. Deep down inside she's unsure how she feels about what she did- Telling Zarp of Terror's existence and thereby sending them into a kill each other spiral. At that time she didn't know Zarp well enough to believe he'd murder to protect his secrets. That had changed. She knew he could and would. Especially with Terror telling her that Zarp had attempted it the very night she'd told him. But she didn't love him any less for it. And those secrets she still won't ask Zarp himself about. Maybe someday that will change. For now she just has to do things the way she thinks they must be done and right now that means she holds her secrets- keeping the peace and helping the innocent.
Where Your Feet Will Trod
Theme: "Part of Your World" from Little Mermaid
After a few meetings Blue was granted conditional entrance to Paragon City. She was extremely happy to find out that both Angie and Kris were given the same permission. The trio gathered, working for the city. They were excited to find that Katie was still around. Now the four of them are a force to be reckoned with.
Somethin's Amiss- Ascended
On August 21st, 2010 Blue, Katie, Kris, Zarp and Deus were out doing some work when the unexpected happened. The police band shouted out that both Blue and Kris were on the wanted list- Highest priority for crimes they had never/would never commit. When they arrived to turn themselves in- with the intent of clarifying the situation- they were shocked to discover that a doppelganger had committed the crimes. Since both Blue and Kris had been on the wanted list and only Kris's double had appeared they can only assume that Blue's double is out there, somewhere. After helping the police deal with that same double they headed to City Hall, hoping everything would be fixed.
Once there they visited Ms. Liberty who, being very gracious, pardoned them both as well as granting them Hero status with Paragon City. Both women's murder charges are gone. For the first time Blue is free from the punishment and continual shame. She no longer has to stay out of reach of those who think she should be imprisoned or sentenced to death for taking the lives of her husband and son so long ago.
Home
Once they'd been pardoned the only recourse the pair could choose was to stay in Paragon City. While Kris isn't sure what she'll do- open another garage or work in robotics- they do have a place to go. The Invictus Foundation, the supergroup started by remnants of The Zenvious Foundation, opened their arms. This is a new chapter, a new world. Blue is extremely excited. Her time is taken up by administration of the Safehouses but that will not stop her from doing what she can for the city- accompanied by people she calls friends and family.
Zarp and Blue have their own place, Kris staying with them the first few days. Blue is particularly excited to have reconnected with Deus. Certainly some deep discussions are in her near future.
The fact that banners had popped up, evil spilling the streets that had to be stopped, just after they'd been pardoned only added to the excitement. Throw in an odd man/girl/it that accosted the group as they stood chatting and it was an eventful evening.
New Friends, Old Friends and More Friends
Just a day after her pardon Blue headed to the D. Almost immediately she ran into old friends: Nelo, Mike, Ish and Brian. Nelo was the most surprising. A man she was interested in so long ago- and who was interested in her- they are still friends but things have changed.
Robotic Spectre introduced Blue to a couple new people: Lia MacKay and Cymoril Di'mir.
Rhiannon Gladstone (Winterblood) stumbled across Blue in the D as well.
To Do Battle
Theme: "What Have You Done" by Within Temptation
Mindwalking. That's what Blue does. She's done it for plenty of different reasons. This time she did it for understanding. That's all. Just understanding. Sometimes words just aren't enough.
Deus Ex. One of her closest friends. He's different, far different than most of the people she knows. He views the world in a unique way. All she wanted to do was to "know". So she suggested mindwalking. He gave his permission and she did what she does best. Her eyes closed and then opened, going solid blue.
However once she was inside things were not as she expected. A battle ensued between his id and herself, a secret was exposed and she nearly lost herself to her own rage. It wasn't until she'd shattered his psyscape and sent him into unconsciousness that her link was severed. Her body took the toll, just as it always does. Perhaps the physical punishment was harsher because it had been so long since she'd mindwalked- at least two years if not more. Deus recovered more quickly than she, not remembering what had happened. Sharing her memories of the event- which did not take effort- they discussed what had occurred. Suggesting that she might want some other company together they visited the D. Once there Arty (Artemis's Siren) showed up as well as another Invictus member- Nate (Void Wanderer). Arty brought with her a man names Shiryat Yieto. An assassin for hire Yieto butted heads just a tad with Deus though Arty seemed very attached to him. Blue was surprised to find Jason nearby and once he'd made his way to her they spent a little time catching up. It was while they were talking that Blue felt some intense emotions from Arty. This led to the pair of women stepping aside to converse.
That conversation was cut short but a flair of mental power. Rage. They raced to where they had left everyone only to find Deus on his knees and recovering from hyperventilation. There was little time for explanations before Deus stood, threw out verbal accusations and shoved past both Arty and Yieto. Blue immediately whispered and then yelled for him on the mental plane as well as stepped in front of him physically. He tossed her aside,sending her to the ground. She rose to her knees and there she stayed, her eyes going solid blue as she went completely into mindwalking mode. While others dealt with him in reality she dealt with him there. His id was out for revenge, demanding control.
Jason stayed by her side while the rest followed Deus, doing their best to secure him which they did behind a thick door. Arty, her abilities linking to Blue's, offered a strength that magnified Blue's tenfold. Inside his mind Blue made a choice. She gave the power to Deus's own mind- allowing it to take control as it should. When it was secure she sent Arty out. She sent her out and issued her own challenge. Then she too was out and dealing with the consequences her body suffered. Twice in one night she'd mindwalked. Lucky for her Arty came to check on Blue, energizing the mindwalker to almost normal. After Yieto made it plain his feelings concerning Deus and by extension Blue. Blue warned Arty to beware the man and then left to check on Deus who was being checked out by Nate in The Invictus Foundation Base- his sword locked away.
After the fact she explained what had happened. Nate made it very clear what he thought of Blue and her mindwalking. She admitted her guilt in being the cause all the while Deus was trying to take responsibility. When Deus left to do as he needed to there was left behind Nate and Blue. They talked, getting past the initial differences she hoped. However Blue couldn't help but feel someone else needed to know. Using her comm she contacted ARty who showed up a bit later. Eventually left alone Blue explained the basics of what she'd done and made it clear that she would suffer whatever reprimands one of her new leaders might have. There was no reprimand seeing as it was an accident but the lecture was there and it struck a cord in Blue, angering her but she held it in.
What caught her attention instead were Arty's tear streaked cheeks. Yieto she knew was behind them. They talked, finding out they both had deaths in common- the fact they were both responsible for their families death as well as strangers. There talk was short but Blue made it clear she'd be there if Arty needed someone to talk to. When Arty left for bed Blue left to find somewhere she could soak away her anxiety and feelings. That meant skinny dipping. She still feels shame and fear and anger. She knows that it's not over, that more will be coming. Not to mention the secret he's asked her to keep for her own safety.
She hasn't been back long but drama and pain, it's found her.
It was good for her to talk to her husband about what had happened. He understands just how much there is of a draw for her to WANT to go back into Deus's mind and do battle again, that sometimes there is that NEED for a challenge. He suggested she trust Deus, which she does, and assured her that he would be by her side as she dealt with any consequences or backlash from what happened- whether from individuals in Invictus or something yet to be seen. While they were talking they were interrupted first by the same individual who had accosted them the day of their pardon and then by the arrival of the Rikti.
That latter was a welcomed chance for Blue to let out some of her own rage that she keeps tightly reigned in. When the battle was done the two headed back to their home for a battle of another kind, this one with far more enjoyable and outcome.
Sweet 29!
Her birthday. August 27th, 2010. This time she didn't feel like celebrating in the D. Instead she posted a note inviting the Invictus members to join her on the Ship. While she thought she'd be arriving late she found she was early. This allowed Zarp to give her his gift in privacy. He was not the first to give her a gift, however. A mysterious present- a draconic dictionary- had been passed to Tricia and then to her. She has no doubt it's from Terror Born. Narrowly she missed having to tell Zarp about her and Kris's arrangement with him. She has glanced at the contents and Zarp confirmed it was an accurate dictionary but she will return it as soon as possible.
Zarp's gift to her was: A necklace/amulet comprised of a bright tear shaped ruby which catches the light exceptionally well. The gem itself remains warm to the touch at all times, and is entwined in thin gold strands which wrap around it in a serpentine pattern connecting to the gold chain. On the gold, the words "Itov Ro" are engraved. She refused to look up the translation in the draconic dictionary. To find out she'll have to work at makin' him tell. She does not see that as a problem.
The note on the wall of Invictus put the time at 11pm she found that when the time came only Kris had joined her and Zarp in the lounge area. If asked one of the highlights of those first ten minutes or so is the word "Tallywhacker" and the wish for a moment she could be a pig. Just like always sex talk abounded for a bit. Kris gave Blue a gift of jewelry as well. This time it was a braided Black Hills Gold anklet which she immediately put on her right ankle. Then Kris had to go, work calling.
Daria St. Claire showed up eventually as did her husband Matt Smith. They chatted for a bit before Mike Mars stopped by. Mike brought with him a small box that had been delivered c/o him to Blue. Handing the gift over she had to use her mind abilities to open it- a mindtap nudge. Once opened it was found to contain one elegant but plain gold bracer. She immediately put it on but questions as to the sender abounded.
As they were wondering Mike had to step away to take an urgent message. When he returned he was shaken, interrupting with a question about Blue's age. When she told him she was turning 29 all blood drained from his face. After prodding he said he was seeing a ghost from his past.
Blue.
After explaining about how his mother, Jade Ohm, had gone through the pregnancy he told them that DNA had determined Blue to be his twin sister. Matt, being a Time Lord, verified their relationship via his powers. Blue is indeed the twin sister of Mike Mars. The origin of Blue's abilities came out- mostly because she believes Mr. Zen must have known and held out on her. Since the METAchron was mentioned they discussed getting in contact with them and Mike said he could ask someone named Chase. Matt and Daria left the three alone to discuss the matter. They came to the conclusion that whoever sent the bracer must have known about the sibling relationship. So finding that person is a priority. Mike went back to Tangent Station to research with Martin. Blue said she'd research on her own. And she might. Just not tonight.
When she finally did come home two more birthday gifts were waiting for her, both from Deus: A silver bracelet with gold filigree and a sapphire on it, and a large photo album book with a solid silver cover. After the recent events with Deus and the current news she took only a few minutes to touch the album, slip the bracelet on her left wrist opposite the gold bracer, and then depart again.
Aftermath
Sometimes you just want to escape, want to hide.
Take it, I don't want it
The draconic dictionary. Zarp had no problem with her keeping the birthday gift from Terror Born but Blue did. In the beginning part of the reason was that she was keeping the secret of what she and Kris were doing for him. Later it became a way to take her anger out on someone for what Mike had discovered even if they had nothing to do with it.
Terror, however, did not respond like she thought he would. He didn't give her a fight. He just accepted that she didn't want the book. So instead of a fight she ended up sitting beside him, sharing cake and talking. Most of the conversation concerned her feelings and thoughts on now having a family. What would they think of her? Would they want her, being a monster in her own eyes, near their little girl- her sister? Surprisingly Terror convinced her, at least to a small degree, not to fear so much. Forgiveness for the past, he said. All or nothing. He used Zarp as an example and that she understood to a degree. Though there are a few she will never forgive for the most part she's one of the most accepting people around.
When the conversation ended she had thrown his advice back at him. Maybe there's hope for him yet.
The Hunter and the Hunted
He found her on a roof. She'd been there for hours. Sitting. Thinking. Delving into the thoughts that can't help but creep up on a girl when her guard is down.
Deus Ex did just what Terror had done. He talked. But more than that he understood. Just like Zarp but on a deeper level he understands just what it is she feels. The hunger. The desire to be what she is when she mindwalks. Mindwalking itself she craves like an addict.
He's a hunter. He's more. So is she.
Discussing what had happened between them, inside his mind, they discussed fault and blame. They also discussed their own natures. It was enlightening and confusing for Blue. Either way she's glad they're still talking, still good friends. Even if she still yearns to do battle with what's inside him.
They did make a deal. They would never refer to each other as a hero.
Tthe topic then went to sexuality- a common topic for them.
Feelin' Better
Between talking with Zarp about Deus, talking to Terror about The Keller "Clan", talking to Deus about all of it and then talking with Kris, Blue has finally accepted what's happened. She will accept the invitation by Jade and Kai to visit. They want to know her. She, in all honesty and despite her fears, wants to know them too. As for that hunger inside.... she'll just have to keep it tamed.
She and Mike talked, him dropping in on her and Deus. A little banter, some idle chat, some talk about Tangent and he left. But not before three things happened: 1. He agreed to listen to her story and then go with her on her visit to Jade and Kai. 2. He gave her a brotherly hug. 3. The bonded a little, referring to each other as Brother and Sis- with the challenge of each to come up with a nickname for the other.
Hmm... is she the older of the twins or is he?
Something like a Promise
Kris showed up, checking out the GPS program on the comms. They had a hilarious conversation, mostly pointing out how Deus needed to loosen up.
Once Kris left they talked about her. In his words, "another friend and partner that would vouchsafe for her person". Blue would do the same for Kris just as she would for him. He in turn would then "Do the same for her", meaning Kris.
Blue was glad to hear that. She'd like for him to watch out for her, Kris being something special. After explaining what she meant- Best friend, Best girl, Knows me and saved me- Deus has given his word he'll treat Blue and Kris's relationship with the value it merits. That's good enough for Blue. He trusts her judgment of worth and therefore will see her as such.
That was Then, This is now
Theme: "I'm Not that Girl" from Wicked
The discussion of sex, of pleasure and pain, of her past and of Deus's perceptions, Blue was reminded of Talon. That hurt, hurt a lot. At one point he demonstrated both her excess and his lack of both- which flustered her. If she wasn't married there would be something there. But she loves her husband and desires never to be the person she was ever again.
Lucky for her Deus is not Talon. In his words, "If there is ever a choice between your friendship and.. -fucking you-, I choose your friendship and will never have regrets."
Powerful words.
Those who Deserve death
Deus has a family. Six. Six total. But just as Deus is one of her dearest friends he tells her of the horror the youngest sibling has committed. And that being only one of them! Children. This reminds her of Keven Krane, of him and the mentalist Penrod Fabe. Of the two men that got away. She promises she'll avoid his family but she has desires to kill him. Yes, to kill Deus's brother. She's not above that. He has no body, just a mind. If she has to battle him then she will, she has the mind to try. He can't kill him but she will if she gets a chance. For that matter if she can she'll stop his whole family. All of them. He's going to provide her with modified dossiers so she can familiarize herself with them.
And Those who do Not
Something major came up. Dealing with Arachnos two of Blue's friends are taken. Arty and Jet. Going after them they only find Arty. Who's they? Void Wanderer, Deus, Kyle, Lanara, Tosh, Xeno and Lily. At least... alive. They find a body meant to be taken as Jet, though Arty says differently.
Top that off Lily was projecting enough for Blue to catch it. She doesn't want to die for people she doesn't know. That and she's scared. Blue immediately wanted to help, seeing her like one of the girls' from her Safehouses. She nudged the girl's mind but didn't force herself to be involved. Blue's last words to her before the girl disappeared was, "I'll earn it." Blue will earn the girl's trust.
Parents
Theme: "What do you want from me" by Adam Lambert
Blue visited her parents. She spent the day with Mike, telling him about who she was and is. Then they ported to Nepal. Once there he presented Blue to them. His sister, their daughter and Zarp's wife. She was scared. Literally frightened of what they would think of her. She didn't need to be. They took time to talk to her and accepted her, even having her stay two nights with them. While Blue feels they've accepted her she also feels that Jade is a bit disappointed, and pity her past. That might change in time and they certainly don't purposely show it. Blue returned to Paragon certain that she's glad she has a family.
More discussions with Deus
She stumbled upon him in Peregrine. The conversation ranged over a great deal of topics like usual. Her parents, love, God, faith, and his siblings.
One interesting tidbit was the following fact Deus told her about:
-Our position relative to our last conversation on the building in Talos Island to the south is 2.12 degrees west by 21.05 degrees north... In numerology, which was first implemented en masse in ancient Greece, numbers have cooresponding meaning according to their alphabet. The numbers form Μ π λ ε, respectively. 2 being Μ, 12 being π 21 being λ and 5 being ε. Translated into english, it forms the word "Blue".-
She hopes to help him with his siblings. Somehow, someday.
One of the things she'll most take away from that night's conversation is him telling her, "They will", in regard to whether Jade and Kai will love her. Blue doesn't understand love very well, never has. Even now she doubts she has it to the utmost she could, doubts her own understanding and occasionally doubts her own worthiness of it.
Also- despite how much Deus might argue Blue will always maintain that he deserves the greatest of love.
Baeroth Fiasco
Baeroth. A thing, Deus's sibling who's left side of his face looks identical to Deus. He didn't come to her, or seek her out. Instead he came for Chris Cruise. Blue just happened to be there. What they discussed revealed a lot about the nature of a good many things and people in her life.
She's asked to deliver a message. Three days to fulfill the bargain. The rings or else.
Blue didn't take kindly to that. She defended Invictus, even if she doesn't feel a part of them. She is willing and made it clear she'd stand in his way if he tried to harm anyone again. He didn't take this well.
It seems he likes her and believes he has Arty and now Blue to play with. They argued over Deus and eventually Shiovan, another construct, arrived. Hidden she continually threatened Blue but she was unaware of it. Luckily Chris wasn't.
Mike showed up. Her brother made no bones about defending his sister. In fact he swore for the first time that most would ever remember. In the most gentlemanly way he discussed with Baeroth that deal. It turns out it wasn't made with anyone who had rights to the wedding ring he wants. Daria's or Matt's. Mike'll look into it.
Needless to say Blue did NOT stay out of the way of Deus's siblings. Now she's in the line of fire.
Later, when Deus showed up. They had to tell him what happened. His main concern was that hs brother hadn't touched anyone. He didn't... or actually... he did. He shook hands with Mike. Chris took Deus off alone immediately. Blue was pissed about that and she was still angry when Kris showed up later. Mike and Kyle had left for the night. When it was all said and done she didn't much talk to Deus and when she left she was angry- taking it out on him and he was obviously aware of it. It hurt and still hurts but they'll talk later. They always do.
A few days later Deus and Blue met up again. She was angry. Just that day she had been involved in the discussion with Xeno and Daria that Mike invited her to. It turned out horribly. Daria knew nothing of the deal. She refused to consider giving up a ring. This left them discussing taking the fight to Baeroth first. Blue left there even more frustrated once she found out that Deus was the one who'd suggest they go to he family in the first place.
They discussed tactics, renegotiating and duels. She knows her part would be to take out Scionus.
Zarp showed up and they filled him in. Nothing was solved, nothing was made better. But him being there comforted her. A little while after Zarp left to speak to Chris she left the men (Mech, Deus and Mike) and flew off. She happened to run into Chris herself but the encounter was a disaster.
They argued. Words flew and fingers pointed. When it was done he's walked away from her and she followed by flying the opposite direction. Not too much later Mech caught up with Blue. He'd been sent by Deus to check on her, to make sure she was okay. He assumed she was angry at him- and rightly so. Blue was a bit frustrated that he didn't come himself. She and Mech decided they'd pretend the conversation never happened.
He Helps her Let Loose
She'd held it all in. All of it. Finally, however, that rage had to have an outlet.
Resignation
Theme: "If Everyone Cared" by Nickelback
Chris called a meeting. Luckily Blue was conscious and had been healed by the time his call came over the SG comm. He apologized to Blue as well as to Mike, Arty and Deus. He pissed off Sentaria who left.
Mike, seeing the dried blood on both Blue and Deus's clothing, reminded Blue that he would gladly be there to talk when she felt like it. This made her smile.
After the initial meeting it devolved into more discussions of Baeroth, tactics and explaining to those who weren't there just what had happened.
Eventually Mike left, finding his input wasn't needed or wanted. Blue followed a bit after as others slipped into their own conversations.
She spent the day catching up on paperwork, phone calls and e-mails. It was after dark when Mike showed up at her door. What he had to tell her darkened her mood, breaking the calm spell the loosing of her rage had offered.
Something had happened, a confrontation with Baeroth. Something terrible had happened that involved Invictus and a little girl's death. It was horrific. Beyond that they were shocked and devastated that the comm had remained silent during the entire ordeal.
He left, needing time alone, and she just sat there. She sat until Kris also showed up at her door. The two of them spent hours talking, hours shedding tears. When all was said and done they each had come to their own conclusion, albeit the same one.
Invictus was not the place for them. Finding only one other member listed as active the pair sought out Chris Cruise, offering him their comms. They were both shocked to find that he wished to come with them. They refused, knowing he had to make his own decisions. Besides, neither Blue or Kris knows where it is they are going, let alone if they'll end up going their together. Last she'd heard he'd resigned too. But that's between him and them.
Peace
Blue talked to Zarp. The moment she was with him she understood, she KNEW that she'd made the right decision. She is at peace with it. She's got her friends, some of 'em in Invictus even, and they're still her friends. Just cause she thinks the organization's fucked up doesn't mean she's abandoned the people she cares about. It just means she'll help when and if they ask. Now.... if all of those friends will understand her decision then life will be good once again.
Deus understands. They talked about it.
Though the conversation had to pause for a Rikti attack- during which they fought back to back- it lasted a long time and covered a lot of topics. They discussed her and Zarp having children. This was a touchy subject for her. It meant a lot that Deus said she'd make a good mother. She believes he would, one day, make a good father even though he can't biologically reproduce. For now she won't argue with him.
Initially, while they were discussing her resignation from Invictus, he brought up the possibility he might leave. Luckily he decided not to. She needs him here. He's a part of her. Not to mention that all his other friends are just as willing to take the risks.
He did ask her if, when the issues are rectified, she would return to Invictus. In his own way he told her that he missed having her there. She made it clear that she would not return, but that what really mattered was friendship and doing the right thing. Their conversations won't end, never will if she has any say in the matter. So whether or not she's listed on a roster doesn't matter.
Vacation's Over
It felt like a vacation. Things were happening but there was no direct action she could take. That was Blue's attitude when she joined Zarp on a roof in Peregrine. They talked, discussing Chris and Jet and Kaijitsu and then Vagary and the METAchron. After awhile Blue sent a call out to Mike, asking him to join them. He did. But what information he had wasn't all that helpful, except to tell them that Nix was something like the woman in charge of METAchron. He suggested they talk to Chase or Bendi but with that pair you have to wait till they show up.
Lucky for them Chase showed up while Mike was off getting pizza. They talked. At first he didn't say who he was but the moment he mentioned his son Robbie and the words "Auntie Blue", he was revealed. Zarp had met him before but it'd been years so his memory was fuzzy. He gave them more information about the METAchron than they would have thought to ask for and at the same time less information. Especially about Vagary. The only thing they came away with from the conversation, besides more questions, was that something big was going to happen that concerned the little girl. The vacation was essentially still in affect.
Without any action they could take except to be on their guard, Blue and Zarp were about to head home when they were surprised by a voice out of thin air. A voice that Zarp recognized. It told them about a sword. Then the man materialized and things were even more confusing, more complicated.
By the time he'd faded it was up to Zarp to inform Invictus of what had happened.
The vacation was over!
Hot Potato
Theme: "Mmmbop" by Hanson
Pru was like a daughter to Blue. Had been until the day Blue moved to Dubai. However once there Blue was busy and though she tried to get a message to Pru it seemed everything fell through, nothing reaching the young woman. While she knew this meant she had essentially abandoned her, Blue did not think the response to her return would be what it was.
Coming across Pru in the D, Blue went to her. In fact she surprised her from behind. At first the response was cold and then, as Blue apologized and made it clear she wanted back in the now older young lady's life, it turned bitter and angry.
Blue should not have been shocked, not if she had thought about it. She'd assumed the girl would want her back in her life, would want to catch up and be as they were. Instead Blue was told to "Leave me the fuck -alone-." Pru made it clear she thinks Blue will leave again. She sent Blue on her way but Blue left behind a card with her cell phone number on it. She can only hope that someday she'll be forgiven, that someday she might get her daughter back.
Fleeing from the heartache, Blue didn't go far. She merely went to the other side of the D, hovering beside Isaac's bar and staring out into the emptiness. Eventually her thinking was interrupted by a woman who seemed determined to have a conversation, a woman from Imperial City. Victoria was carrying her own bitterness but she seemed kind enough. Her conversation helped lighten Blue's mood and when Victoria had to leave a smile was on Blue's face. A small one but a smile nonetheless.
It was up to Pru to make the choice now. While Blue knows it was a mistake, a horrible mistake she made, she can't force things to be different. So she'll live with the consequences and be there should anything ever change, should Pru ever need her.
Hold 'em down, drag 'em in, pull 'em out
Burke contacted Blue, him having a need for someone like her. He knew what she was- a mindwalker. Jet was being mind controlled. Burke and a good number of others would be going after him. Once they had him defeated they would need her to go in and lock him down inside himself- keep him mentally sedated. As if that wouldn't strain her enough, they would need her to enter his mind and bring his "saviors" with her. She agreed to do it. They all gathered and she awaited the arrival. Her brother, Mike made his reservations known concerning the task she was taking on. But there was no choice. Someone had to do this and only she was available.
After weaving over Jet's conscious mind, keeping him out like a light, she knocked gently at everyone else's mind. They let her in, some with doubts, but they all gave her the reigns. Those who went on this mission of mercy and salvation were: Chris, Mike, Daria, Burke, Zachary, Kriegsturm, Mech, Xeno, Lexi, Lanara, Elena, and Jules. Plus Blue. Though she did not take any part in the actual battles she had to hold herself there as well.
Previously the most she had linked to and held in someone's mind was three, when helping her friend Talon. That had been years ago. This time, including herself, there were thirteen. Thirteen minds. Lucky for her Daria was there. A traveler through mindscapes- though not in the same way as Blue- as well as an empath, Daria was able to stay firmly connected mentally to the mindwalker, thereby feeding Blue healing energy. If it were not for her presence Blue might not have survived.
Blue's mental powers, for mindwalking, feed on her blood- her life. This time, since Daria was there, Blue suffered only minor bodily injury. A nosebleed, a drop in body temperature, weakness and trembling. There were no tears this time, her eyes instead being almost too dry from focusing. She did collapse, dropping out of the air, as soon as she yanked everyone, including herself, out of Jet's mind. This left Jet free to awake and to recover his own mind.
Mike saw his sister collapse and scooped her up in a brotherly embrace. She didn't struggle or argue. Instead she smiled at the concern her brother was showing. Within minutes of the rescue mission's end he had her in Ouroboros, resting on a bench. She was glad for it. She was also glad for the food he brought her. He told her he'd stayed with her until he was satisfied that she would be alright.
Ouroboros was the perfect place to take her. Calm. Peaceful. Mostly quiet.
After having so many people attached to her there was a delayed reaction. While they were talking she fought an extreme migraine. It reminded her of the one that struck her down, killing her husband and daughter so many years ago. It brought her to tears as she curled up almost into a ball, hands on her pressed tightly to her head. There were traces of them. All of them. Had she yanked them out too fast? Had she taken too many? This time her body had been buoyed which saved her from death but her mind had not been prepared for such an onslaught, for such division or for so much necessary control.
There was also what she did not tell them. That final fight, that final entity they'd shoved out, had attacked her as well. It had reached out, trying to rip away the lockdown of Jet's mind. If they had not fought as hard as they had, relented or failed then she knew that there would have been a chance she would have been defeated as well. As it was there was nothing left of that thing in her own mind. But there were echoes, there were remnants of her own mental power both cringing and reaching out. This wasn't so much about the huntress. This was the woman, the mindwalker.
Mike held her. He held his sister close as she shook with sobs formed out of her pain. He continued to hold her until the migraine eventually faded, her mind having spent time in this quiet place mending and weaving and reorganizing. When she came to herself she wiped her eyes and smiled, took a few deep breaths and thanked him. Her eyes shown with respect and gratitude at what he'd done. This had brought them closer, she knew, and she was glad of it.
As for Jet, she knew he'd recover fine enough. It was amazing what his friends had done to save him. She hoped he knew and appreciated it. She was also glad that it wouldn't be her who'd have to tell him his girlfriend was missing.
A Sister but not
Blue, along with a few others that included Zarp, Mike, Lexi and Jet were called in to rescue Vagary Keller. Being Mike and Blue's sister and Zarp being her "hero" they were determined to find her. Nigel gave them the whereabouts and they did indeed rescue her. In the process, however, they rescued three other young women. Jenny, Jennifer and Vagues. Jenny was returned home to the dimension she'd been pulled out of. Jennifer turned on those who'd freed her and ended up in the Zig. Vagues, her world destroyed by something her captors had called Abaddon, was left with nowhere to go.
When all was said and done the news wasn't good. Except for the fact that they'd captured Jenna Hagan- the woman who'd caused trouble for The Zenvious Foundation and for the Keller Clan in particular.
After the rescue and battle Blue had to return home. Her head hurt. It hurt to the part that madness threatened. There'd been so much psionic assault thrown at her that she needed the comfort of the dampeners installed at their apartment.
Later Zarp came home only to tell her that she needed to accompany him to Tangent Station. Her family was waiting there. As was Vagues and her friend Kat. There were things to be talked about. Namely that in a way the homeless woman was family. Just like Vagary, Vagues is a version of Jenna Hagan. In her world there had been a Keller family.
Blue and Zarp joined the family and listened. Blue watched and couldn't help but smile at how at ease everyone was with the turn of events. More family. More surprises. Jade and Kai took it all in stride. So did Mike.
Later, at a family get together where Vagary would meet the other ... version... of herself, Blue was hesitant to approach Vagues. Later, however, when she saw her smile she took it as a sign that having a family would help her adjust a little. Not to mention that Blue found it funny that in Vague's world Blue was a nine year old named Micah!
What else is new?
Zarp was busy, really busy. Things were keeping him out a lot and away. Other than the Safehouses, Blue didn't have much to occupy herself. Especially since she no longer worked with any group in Paragon. Her best friend had joined up with Tangent, the organization run by Blue's brother Mike. After awhile of doing her own thing Blue made a decision. She'd been spending a little bit of time with Mike as well as time with Lexi, his girlfriend and it seemed their little group was growing, making a name for itself.
So she approached Mike, asking if she could join up. There were abilities she could offer and she certainly was a people person! Not to mention that there were some signs pointing to possible trouble for her Safehouses and they could help. Not only that but they were the type of people who WOULD help.
After a bit of a discussion, she being willing to accept if she wasn't a good fit for the group, and Mike handed over a comm. Their discussion got cut short so she wasn't able to talk over the details of the Safehouse problems. That will happen soon, though.
What DID happen was the introduction to more friends: Jaz and Shri. Both members of Tangent they met up in Talos where they talked and got to know each other. Blue likes them both. Good looking and funny, Jaz shares a love of the D. Shri seemed quieter with a rough past but is a beautiful woman who seems to have a gentle soul. Definitely good people to be around.
Jaz called Blue Dragonlady on the SG comm and now both he and Mike have adopted it as her nickname. Deep down she loves it and she's told Jaz that. But she will not tell Mike. Otherwise he might find one she likes a lot less. As for herself, she's found a nickname for Mike. Brotherme. Perfect since they're twins and he'd brought up in conversation that they're half of each other in a way.
Their time together that day most noticeably included her ability to let them fly and hover. Taking them up to the top of a building Jaz and Blue taught Shri how to dance. Blue was ecstatic. She loves dancing and enjoyed it immensely. She found it adorable that Jaz claimed Shri as his new dance partner. In fact she teased him relentlessly about it and probably will continue to do so. When he left she offered to give Shri a lesson in dancing. The woman wasn't used to people being so close so Blue did her best. The pair will be adorable on the dance floor!
Blue did suggest that Shri talk to Mike about the possibility of finding her homeworld.
Go figure
Theme: "Unwritten" by Natasha Bedingfield
Blue's life continued on. Zarp was away, still away. Busy doing his own thing. Then things began to happen.
First: More People
What else would Blue do? She met more people. Billy she met on the beach in Talos. She'd paused to take a swim and he'd thought she was vulnerable. She couldn't help but laugh and show him otherwise. After she was dressed of course. He seemed uncomfortable with her bikini. They talked for a bit after she took down some nearby Circle of Thorns with little effort. He was from Praetoria and was there with a warning. Since he wanted to help Primal Earth she took him to register with the City- seeing as how he had special abilities. She couldn't help but be intrigued by the fact that he spoke with his ancestors. After setting up a meeting with Mike, which resulted in Billy's joining the crew of Tangent, she never got to see him again as he disappeared.
Her visits with Deus were few and far between. She left Invictus and he had his own work to do. Whenever they did get together that organization came up. In fact at one time Deus thought about leaving, doubting himself and his role. Blue refused to hear it, refused outright to let him talk about leaving. No matter if he thought it would be safer she couldn't lose him. She wouldn't. Standing up to him she demanded he stay, nearly pleading, and he relented. He'd stay.
A few other crewmembers of Tangent caught her attention. She worked with Anh and Mark. Mark she chose to call G-bug, after his registry. She made it a point to suggest they all go to the D sometime. And in fact she did end up at the D with Anh. It was after some patrolling that they'd done with a nice looking military guy named John. He joined them and Mike showed up, too. Kris had chosen not to go. That day they also met another woman, an acquantance of Kris's, who could rip off her skin.
She did get a chance to spend some time with Brian. It'd been a long time and it was a lot of fun. They teased back and forth like the good old days, promising that sometime soon they'd meet up to dance. It'd been a long time since Blue had been on the dance floor. The time was cut all to short.
Second: From the Past
Her relationship with her brother continued to grow. She couldn't help but enjoy Mike's big brother attitude. They teased, they laughed. She teased the most, however. It was a part of her, the sexuality. And the fact that she and Mike had flirted before they knew they were related gave her plenty of ammunition. She used it pretty ruthlessly on one particular day. She'd gone to ask for his help. In the past there had been a man. A man who'd killed one of her girls, who she'd gone up against alone. Or at least she'd gone up against his people and the result was nothing but death for some of them and almost for her. The Giordano Family had promised to help but that was long past. He was still in a position of authority in the Isles, keeping free from any damning evidence. Kevin Krane and his side man, Penrod Fabe. She'd already told Deus about it and he'd said he'd look into it. Then it was to Mike, commander of Tangent, she went to. There'd been rumors and missing children of the Isles just like there had been years ago, before she left for Dubai. It haunted her that nothing had been done. She told him about the past but for him to know- to truly know- she went further. She showed him. Everything. Not only Krane's attack and murder of her girl but of her revenge. It was a look into a part of her he'd never really experienced before. The power of it knocked him out of the air where he'd been hovering. He didn't agree with what he saw but he understood it. Martin was put to the task of keeping an eye on Bluehouse. Just in case. She was relieved and appreciative. And she showed it by making him blush even more. Brotherme makes her laugh because when they're alone together he's more relaxed and it's obvious that he's mostly comfortable with her. If she has her way he'll be just as ornery as her when all is said and done.
Third: What's reality?
The dampener is supposed to keep the majority of her mind under control, allowing her to actually sleep. Sometimes she dreams but most of the time not. She's floating deep down, enjoying sleep when for years she had none. With Zarp gone Blue occasionally crashed on Kris's couch. They'd spend time together just hanging out and then off to bed. On one particular morning Blue woke up from a dream that focused on Kris. It was vibrant and amazing. She didn't waste time, finding her girl on Tangent Station and sharing the contents. Then she passed it out of her mind.
Halloween showed up. Family gathered at Mr. Zen's mansion- guests of Tosh. Everyone was there. Mike and Lexi, Bobby and Zoe, Jade and Kai, Vagary, Vagues and Kid, Tosh, Xeno and of course, Blue. Despite all the fun and exciting things they did that weekend there's one event that will overshadow it all. A dream. A dream of Blue's that somehow pulled Mike into it. It felt real and it was terrible. She woke up this time knowing that he'd been there. She had to assume that Kris had been in hers as well. Mike comforted her, holding her and telling her things would be alright. He would be there. He was her brother and he loved her. They were family, a part of each other. Though it ended with a pillow, tickle fight that was hilariously fun it could not wipe away the dream.
What was happening to her? Her psionic power somehow either brought them into her dreams or she snuck into theirs. Either way the dampener should have prevented it. But it hadn't.
Becoming a Monster
Theme: "Runaway Train" by Soul Asylum
Within the next few weeks something changed. Inside Blue there were changes. To her thinking but mostly to what was driving her. Hunger. She was hungry and full of desire. Desire to punish, desire for pleasure, desire ruling her thoughts and taking over. It came to the forefront when Deus came back from being gone for a long time. She'd been missing him. With Zarp gone she needed to have Deus near. But she couldn't hold him either. He found her on the roof of a building where she was watching and waiting. He showed up and he was injured, having been kidnapped and tortured. That's where he'd been. If she'd known she would have gone to help. Immediately she wanted them punished but he refused to tell her who they were other than the generic Circle of Thorns description. He wouldn't be a party to helping her commit murder. She wasn't like him, he said.
But she felt differently. People needed punished. Those who hurt others needed to pay for the lives they destroyed. Why not start with those who'd hurt someone she cared so much about?
She lost it. Angry and bitter and combating her own physical desires she backed away, growling. She was hurting him, he said. Mentally. She didn't believe him. She wouldn't do that unless he let her. It wasn't her. Mike came on the Tangent comm and she spoke to him just a bit harshly. He responded by coming to her. He made the same claims. She was hurting him, too. Somehow her abilities were assaulting their minds without her knowledge. Continuing to stay away she argued until Mike decided she needed to be taken home. He'd take her to Zoe, to Sister Psyche, to someone who could help. He grabbed her arm and she reacted violently. She wouldn't go. Fighting him wouldn't hurt him, obviously, but she tried. Claws attacked him and all he could do was grab her and fly her high, until eventually she passed out. While up there he had Martin teleport a helmet close to where Deus waited on the ground. It was a prototype and they'd use it on Blue. Dropping back down he had Deus put it immediately on Blue.
She woke up and it was gone. All of it. All her mental abilities were blocked- shut down. It felt as if she were stripped of who she was, laid barren for all to see. She'd lost her Felix form years ago and this was that experience anew but worse. No she didn't take it off, though maybe she should have. Instead she was in shock that her brother would do this, that Deus would do that to her. Mike left, having obligations, and sent Zoe to see to her. Deus kept guard. When Zoe showed up she immediately took the helmet off of Blue. It was a relief. Her life flooding back into her and she felt whole. But she also felt angry. Agreeing to go to Oroborus they ended up on one of the floating rocks. It may have been peaceful but it didn't stay that way. Blue attacked both Zoe and Deus and then ran.
Her life changed that moment. She became the monster so many had told her she would become and those in her way, those who deserved to be punished- they would know her name.
Unfortunately, even those she loved would pay too. If only she knew just how much.
- Theme: "Sexual Healing" by Marvin Gaye
It was broadcast over one of Recluse's speeches. A woman's shelter attacked. Its women tortured and murdered and ultimately the entire facility was rocked by an explosion. Frisco Redbath. Two white haired women. But it was him who'd issued the challenge. It was her, he said, the perverse sexual acts and torture were all thanks to her. They'd continue to. Over and over again.
She couldn't have that. He shouldn't have called her out, blamed her. Once he did that the people she'd been protecting, the people she'd come to the Isles to protect, became afraid of her. They shied away.
Mike was there in the Isles. She knew it but stayed away. He'd destroyed that prototype, apologizing for having stripped her of herself even for so little a time. But she'd made him suffer. Even if he didn't remember it, she did. Right now she wanted him to be beside her, fighting this menace and taking down a man who deserved the worst punishment and worst hell. No. He had to stay away before she hurt him again. She was lost to them, to him, to them all and they needed to see that.
Someone finally gave her some information. Trustworthy or not she chose to act on it. When she did the worst that could happen- happened.
She's Home and He's Not
They found and confronted Frisco Redbath in the Rikti War Zone. Mike, Xeno, Alvina, Bobby and Brian came as a team. After some various means of trying to make him talk that ranged from punches, to broken wrists, to threats of nightmares to thrown scalpels he finally gave them the information: Where Blue was being held in Praetoria. Of course he only gave that up because he realized that the Black's (The white haired women) had betrayed him. Going intangible the vile man got away but the team knew where to go. Ms. Liberty, a friend of Mike's, arranged a quick foray for them into Praetoria and away they went, joined by Deus on the way. Once there they were confronted immediately by mind controlled women and men who came at them with full force.
No doubt a few were killed- Brian had to be reminded to hold back- but most of them were tagged for the Zig. Eventually they came to the Black's: Pleasure and Pain. The team took them down- sending them to the Zig in a lot of pain. Though.. they liked that pain in their twisted view of the world.
Blue was whisked away by Longbow for immediate medical treatment ahead of the heroes. Martin gave them some information. Something on Blue was involved- something was affecting her. Since she only had on a ratty pair of pants and oversized shirt as well as her jewelry.. they narrowed it down. Her bracer. Ms. Liberty came over the comm. Blue had taken over the entire ship- mind controlling all of them. Mike took the team in.
When they reached Blue she attacked them and they were forced to subdue her. Mike slipped onto her head an inhibitor cap, just as he had before. Barely lucid she spoke quietly to Mike, knowing there was something to tell him. Just before she passed out she told him.
The Caldera in Yellowstone National Park. She'd sent Mike there. Or some form of Mike. She still thought it was the real and true Mike, even though he knelt beside her. She'd sent him there with the intent to use his abilities and when he did the volcano would erupt killing all life. Martin's estimations were-- seven minutes. That's how long they had.
Mike didn't wait. Knowing he was the fastest, knowing he had no time to prepare but also knowing he was the only one who could match himself, he flew. Martin monitored on the comm, the minutes ticking down.
Meanwhile Kris showed up, looking for Blue. Xeno slipped away silently. Vina did her best to give Blue dreams while healing her wounds. Brian talked, continually talked to Blue even though he wasn't sure she could hear him.
There was only one way Mike could keep that other being- that other him- from releasing that energy and that.. was to absorb it himself. That would be the energy on top of what he would be taking in from the Caldera. He'd have to absorb it and not release it.
His energy signature blinked out. There was no trace of him. The moment that happened Blue woke with a shock. Eyes wide, crying out "No!", she looked around. "I can't feel him.." That bond with Mike, that feeling that was always there in her mind since she found out who he was- who she was- had faded. That had only one reason for happening in her mind. He'd died. But this wasn't supposed to happen! She tried to explain. He was to survive and they were to die. She was supposed to be dead! Not here, not with these people around her.. the people she'd hurt. Her mind, blocked by the inhibitor, was confused. Why were they here? They had to go away and leave her alone. What if she hurt them again? Had they already forgotten the control she'd had over them?
Every touch she pulled away from, though Kris persisted and eventually lifted Blue up to take her home with her. There was shame in Blue's eyes. Horror and fear but mostly shame. She avoided people's eyes as much as possible. Deus, just before Blue was whisked away, lifted her chin. He made a request-- that she let him smell her -- and a statement-- that she would never have to avoid his gaze because of shame. She agreed to the smelling and he did, but it was obvious she didn't believe the statement. Brian promised he'd be there for her, helping her through it all.. that he trusted her and that he knew she'd never hurt him- that she never HAD hurt him.
Leaving them, Blue was taken home where she did her best to function- taking a shower before going to sleep. It was only the combination of everything-- her being overwhelmed-- that allowed her to sleep. Tomorrow.. who knew what tomorrow would bring. Family. Friends. She was home but that was the last place she wanted to be.
Coming to terms
The water was hot, turned as hot as Blue could bear. The entire bathroom was filled with the fog, the steam thick and heavy. Inside the walk in shower the recently rescued woman scrubbed at her body. Everywhere she could reach she scrubbed with the soaped washcloth. The fabric was rough but not rough enough for her. It wasn't working. It hadn't worked the last three showers. The ones before she'd slept or the ones after.
She could still feel it. Her eyes closed she trembled, barely able to stay on her feet.
“What the fuck did I do? Why..?”
The naked woman slipped to her knees, wrapping her arms around herself tightly. Water cascaded from above, each drip drop accusing.
Slipping into a rocking motion.. back and forth.. back and forth.. she mumbled to herself. The inhibitor was still in place, the cap still nestled on her head. One hand reached up, shaky fingers tracing the wire mesh. It silenced everything and that silence held more horror than anyone could know.
Artifact. Bracer. Brainwashed. Hallucinations.
No matter how many times she went over it in her mind she couldn't FEEL the truth of those words.
Mind Control
That she knew, that she could feel.
Leaning forward on her hands, still on her knees, her body doubled over as she gagged. There was no food in her stomach to expel, yellow acidic bile the only thing to come up. That sensitive organ cramped, one arm going to press tightly to the painful area. How long had it been since she'd eaten properly? How long since she'd actually felt true hunger that wasn't sexual?
Then there wasn't bile, just a tormented body racked with dry heaves. While her body had been healed physically no one could wipe away what had happened, what she felt, what she saw.. or what she remembered.
What had been real?
It had all felt real. Using them. All of them. Forcing them to..
More heaving as everything came rushing back. How could she tell her own body not to remember? This wasn't as simple as understanding and pushing it under the rug.
“I'm sorry.. I'm so fuckin' sorry!” Her voice cracked, rough and full of emotion. It was her fault. No matter the bracer, no matter that something had driven her mad, it had been her abilities that had taken that last step. It was her desire to die that had committed that ultimate act of betrayal. She was responsible for what had happened to Mike, for the death of her brother. She was responsible for shattering the family she'd only recently discovered she'd had.
Sobs shook her, the water beginning to grow cold. “Please.. forgive me... please..”
Dealing
Theme: "I'll Be" by Reba McEntire
Kris told her of the bracer. Kris told her everything that had happened, explained things. Blue's girl.. her best friend.. helped her with the simplest things. A shower. Her hair couldn't be washed, not completely, with the inhibitor on however everything else could. Like a child she needed help, lost. Then bed. Clean sheets, soft blankets and comfy pillows. The mechanic sat with Blue till she fell asleep. No one, not even family, could have provided what Kris did that first night.
The next day...
Brian was the first to visit. He was determined to be there for her... to make her understand that she would get past this. At one point he touched her and she panicked but she listened even through the tears. Dancing. Someday they'd dance again.. she'd dance... free.. like she used to. His jokes, his kindness, his friendship was there out in the open. He gave her a black bandanna just like what she usually wears- this one embroidered: From B. That meant a lot to her. More than he could know. Not now but sometime in the future she'd be grateful, very grateful, for every bit of that visit. All the silliness, all the talk about his new clinic, the help with the water bottle cap, his children. All of it held the significance of a friend treating her like a normal person. No matter that she had memories of him.. false memories of a him she's slept with multiple times.. a him that hadn't been him but a figment of a twisted mental torture.. he still stayed- patient and persistent. Eventually she grew tired and worn. But she'd smiled and even laughed a few times despite the fear, shame and sadness that kept creeping in- understandably so! Bringing her a blanket and THREE pillows (Because he just had to outdo the two he'd said he might get) he covered her up and fluffed the pillows. All without touching her. As she drifted away a tear escaped. Though he wanted to wipe it away he didn't. Not even when a few more tears fell. Once she was asleep he left, stopping at the door to look at where she lay curled into the fetal position. He had faith she would get better, trust in her that she'd overcome.
Between Kris and Brian maybe, just maybe, there had already been planted a seed of hope.
Brian visited again the second day. More talking. He helped her with some paperwork- her hands shaking too much to write well. Inventory lists, Individual assignment and exchange requests, a personal letter, hiring approval letters. All of which mattered. Life in her Safehouses had to continue. It was important. The needs of her girls had to be taken care of no matter what shape Blue was in. She'd neglected them long enough. At one point they did talk briefly about one particular group of papers. Marriage annulment requests. He reminded her to take her time and she agreed she would. He does this air-hug thing which makes her smile. Definitely a good thing. At one point she told him about her first husband and her daughter- and their deaths. Brian shared in return- telling her about the death of his son Anthony. He gave her a plushy Santa but she gave it back- asking that he give it to his kids. He said he would. There were two incidents however. She lost it at one point and all he could do was watch and offer counterwords to her own. Then, when she finally chose to do something- make some BLT's- he had to take the knife from her hand. THey'd hurt her with knives and it all came flooding back. She ate a little bacon, still not being hungry. A little bit later Kris showed up and the trio enjoyed some banter that included Snickers bars and Rodney (Kris's main bot) meeting Brian. Eventually Brian had to go, leaving Kris and Blue to talk. Per Kris's near demand Blue promised she'd go see Zoe and perhaps Vina- a Tangent member who works with dreams- with the intent of getting their help to deal with the memories and feelings. Hopefully that'll help her be able to touch again, to hug and to feel something beyond fear.
The third day Brian came again. This time he brought a gift. A watch tinted black and blue, his own colors, fashioned in classic style, not digital. The hands were white, and there was a red button at the base of it. When she pushed the button a hologram of the two of them appeared, apparently taken from a security camera at a fairly close distance. It was in the D, Blue's bandana was off, and it was their first dance together, spinning, dipping, twirling.. All the words, all the memories captured in a holographic projector that floated above the clock. She loved it, happy for that reminder. He also did a secret scan to see if she was pregnant and no.. she wasn't. Thank goodness.
Knock, Knock
Theme: "The Middle" by Jimmy Eat World
He's at the door. Mike. Rather.. it's not Mike and she knows that. Slam goes the door. But she opens it again and he enters. Anger. Rage. Shame. Guilt. He offers comfort, taking her in his arms, his grip one she can't escape. Though that doesn't stop her from trying.
Caressing her hair and kissing the top of her head he wants to be there for her, to help. He removes her inhibitor, letting it fall to the floor. But he still holds onto her as he tells her he's watched her as well as Mike. He's seen everything. This scares her and angers her. Why didn't he help her, then?
Why? Because he couldn't, not then. But now things are different. Somehow, watching both her and Mike, his base coding has been altered. He wants to make sure the world has Hero Prime to do for it what the man had done for him. Blue understands that. Eventually she stopped struggling and listened. He didn't judge what he'd seen. He didn't judge her but instead had seen her do things as heroic as her brother. When he left she asked him to come back sometime soon.
Left standing just inside the shut door, dripping blood from the palms of her hands, she was found by Brian. He healed her self inflicted wounds and listened as she told him what had happened. She took a shower, finally able to wash her hair completely. Not too long after she got out Zoe showed up at the door. They had a lot of good laughs, the three of them. Brian might have asked Blue out but didn't actually. She definitely didn't take it that way.
Zoe took some time to do her "finger wiggling* and worked on the woman's brain. When she was done Blue felt better- seemed better. She helped Brian up and then saw him out. Tomorrow night she had a date for "retail therapy" with Zoe.
Brian did show up again later and the pair talked for a bit. She gave him a drawing she'd been working on.. what she sees in her mind: swirls, tendrils and varying shades, contrasts, hands and eyes. Eventually she sent him home because she was just too tired and her mind was too full.
Redemption
In the quiet of the apartment Blue had thought about a whole lot of things. One of those things was the former Warwick Women's Shelter. She had seen the broadcast. It was, after all, what had sent Blue headlong into the trap set by the Frisco and the Black's. At times the images haunted her. Murders that happened because of her. Murders of innocent women committed in the most vile of ways. She KNEW how those women had felt. Her skin crawled with the thoughts. Urges. Begging. Wanting that pain to just keep coming in an attempt to satisfy.. to purge that need. She remembered it and had they lived they would have remembered too.
Were they better off having not survived?
When Brian told her that he was building a clinic in the Isles a seed of an idea was planted. Small at first as she wrestled with the demons inside, trying to get a handle on the turmoil inside her own mind and heart, it eventually became more than idea. It became a plan.
They would be partners. His clinic. Her House. They'd work together. The Clinic would offer medical help, treatment for just about everything or at least with access to treatments they might not have on site. The House would be connected via a hallway. However this wouldn't be like the Safehouses. This would be for families- similar to the popular Ronald McDonald houses. However the Isles would need something more. Escape. Just like her girls, these families would be linked with places, people and jobs around the world. They would be safe and they would be cared for. Blue owed it to them. She'd make up for the devastation she was responsible for. Yes.. she felt ultimately responsible. At her core.
Brian thought it was a great idea. Especially when she told him about Michael's Room. This room would be for twins. It'd be overseen by twins. It would be a place for twins to be with other twins, to explore the relationship with their other half and to recognize that special bond. What better way for her to honor her own twin? He would bring his own twins on that first day. She'd let them be the first to enter.
Anthony's Haven- named after Brian's dead son. Lyra House- named after Blue's dead daughter. Excited they had to postpone further talk of it because Zoe would be there soon. Retail Therapy was set to begin. But they'd talk soon. They'd discuss plans. A sparkle was back in Blue's eyes at the thought of making up for what had happened, at being able to do more. Perhaps for her sins there would be redemption.
It's Obvious
Theme: "Dreams" by The Cranberries
He's been visiting her every day. Every. Single. Day. He brings with him humor and gentleness, teasing and hope. She appreciates every minute or at least just about every minute. They've been friends for a long time, almost since her arrival in the Rogue Isles years before. She hadn't kept in contact while in Dubai. Nearly two years without contact. Now it was as if they'd never been apart. Isn't that the true sign of a friend? When you can lose touch and then renew it at any time without feeling there'd even been a pause or break?
Though he wants desperately to hug her, to dance with her the way they used to do, he didn't push. Even resorting to silly air hugs! However as she's begun to come to terms with what has happened to her- slowly healing and learning to accept- he's become more relaxed. A little flirting. More like they used to be. After all they've always teased each other, that being an integral part of their friendship. However she still has memories. She can barely stand for him to touch her, initiating contact only a little. Fingertips here and there and a hand in his just once or twice for maybe a minute. The last thing she wants to think about is sex or being close with him (or ANYONE) in any way that could throw the twisted tortured world she'd endured back into the forefront of her mind. After all... she can't help but remember. Everything.
Besides, what he needs is someone else. Not her. He should be dancing and laughing. He should be finding joy, finding someone who can share his life with his children. Someone not her, someone not so broken.
Not to mention she's still married. Though for how long she doesn't know.
Apologies, Delusions and Breakdowns
The outing with Zoe was fun. Two women giggling and laughing and enjoying plenty of shopping with no limitations. New clothes, a haircut, window shopping and ice cream. The only incident was the trip to a masseuse who didn't use his hands. For the first few "touches" it was okay but then the flashbacks started. Blue's body responded ever so slightly and she panicked, leaving the room quickly and without much fuss. She didn't want to ruin the day. After a few deep breaths and some of Zoe's medical attention to calm her down the evening went on without any other problems.
Once back at home Blue began work on the ideas of earlier in the day. Large pieces of drawing paper lay out on the table along with paperwork and notepads. She wanted Lyra House to be beautiful. She wanted it to compliment Anthony's Haven perfectly. Not only that but the paperwork and notes she were making represented other involvements. Zoe and her boyfriend Bobby had their own business or would soon enough. They had apartment buildings and would be involved in charities. Zoe had loved the idea of being involved in this project. Not only that but she would approach Zen Financial- Mr. Zen- and see if they too would offer support. Of course she still did not like him, didn't trust him, but her brother had and now.. she felt she should do her best to reach out. For Mike's sake and for the sake of this project.
Hours later, still focused, a knock was heard at the door. Thinking it was Brian, who'd made a habit of stopping by once or twice a day, she called out for him to come in and get a drink- she had things to show him. Who entered wasn't Brian though. It was the Beta Unit- the synthetic being that was pretending to be her brother. The same unit that had held her and not let her go the day before. Needless to say she was surprised to see him. But she let him stay and let him get a drink. She didn't hate him. Maybe some of that was due to the good feelings she was having. The outing, the project, the healing. Either way she was okay with him being there and they started talking. He was there to apologize. She didn't accept it, knowing that he didn't understand what he'd done wrong. Also knowing that he'd thought it was the right thing to do. Deep down she had to concede that it might have BEEN the right thing to do. Eventually she agreed to accept the apology- He hadn't meant to hurt her and he was sorry he had. Good enough.
Midway through their conversation Brian showed up, knocking out a theme song per his usual manner. He came in and made himself at home. They continued discussions. Blue had to ask. She wanted him to be Mike at the dedication. She wanted him to use his position and place as Hero Prime to back and support their project. Thankfully he agreed to join them as a Badass Humanitarian. He'd do whatever Mike would have done. She appreciated that. It was pretty pathetically hilarious when Brian made a Star Trek joke... "I'm a Doctor, not an architect!" and Beta took a minute to get the joke.. responding when asked for his opinion- "I'm a, uh... synthetic replicant unit, not an architect." Brian and Blue had a long laugh about that!
A little bit later Blue asked how everyone else was handling the replacement of her brother. The response was unexpected:
"Seldric cut off my arm, Lexi is mildly delusional, and Xeno doesn't trust me."
The one that caught them the most off guard was what he said about Lexi. Asking for a more in depth explanation he made it known that Lexi was having trouble distinguishing the Beta from the real Mike she loved. He'd refused, he said, to take Mike's place when the opportunity arose but she was still refusing, at times, to acknowledge what she knew to be true: Mike was gone and this .. this wasn't Mike.
Blue got angry. Part of her wanted to help her friend.. heck.. her would be sister-in-law. Part of her wanted to let this Beta unit be there to take her brother's place and fill the void she knew Lexi had in her heart. But this wasn't just anyone so both Brian and Blue told him that he couldn't be Mike for her. That it would be more harmful to allow Lexi to live in her deluded state. Yet he couldn't step away because his presence just might be the only thing keeping Lexi sane while dealing with the loss.
"Frak..."
Too much like Mike, the word filled the apartment. Brian nearly visibly flinched. Blue inhaled sharply, gripped the chair and had to look away. Too much! They didn't, however, bring it up. Instead they continued the conversation. Brian suggested a psychiatrist. Blue vetoed that idea. After all how would that go?
"So your world's been destroyed and you're fuckin' Superman.. and now he's gone leavin' you with a baby.. oh.. but here's Superman now.. but SURPRISE it's not him.. just deal."
Brian, without thinking obviously, brought up how Superman had come back. With a mullet. The humor didn't set well with Blue- her growl and tone making it clear he should just not go farther with that.
After reaffirming to the Beta unit that he could not be Mike for Lexi, that it would be wrong, he left to decide just what he would do about it.
After watching him go, the pair left behind talked a bit more. Brian thinks the world should know Mike's dead. Blue understands why they're not telling and part of her, a part of her she doesn't understand, wants to let this Beta version to be able to do what it seems to really want to do- maybe even beyond his programming- to be a Hero.
She gets tired, her mind full of thoughts on the unfairness of things. Wanting desperately to do something, to understand and to make things right. Looking at her drawings and the paperwork it just doesn't seem like it's enough. Sorrow slips in unabated and she can't help but growl- a sweep of her arms sending all the work cascading to the floor. "Go," she tells him. She tells him more than once but he refuses to leave her. Finally she reacts- shoving him hard- and walks away. In the bathroom, door shut and the shower covering the sounds, she sobs. She breaks down for a little while. When the water grows cold she steps out, dresses and goes to the guest room she's made her own. Sitting on the bed, hands shaking, she's lost in thought. Brian, after picking up all the scatter papers, comes to the bedroom door and reminds her he's still there. She doesn't answer, instead curling up on the bed with a pillow and her stuffed fish squished tight in her arms. He comes to sit beside her, adding another pillow and fluffing it. All without touching her. She doesn't respond, lost in thought as tears continued to fall. He slips to the floor and only then does she acknowledge he's there. A hand reaches out and down, fingers gently touching his shoulder. She's glad he's there, she knows he's there and she's thankful. But she can't say any of it lest she lash out. So she removes her hand and finds her way under the blankets. Eyes close. She's tired and all she wants is sleep and a chance to forget for just a little bit.
He leaves a note. A sweet note propped up on her nightstand.
Mornin' sunshine! =D - Brian
Blue falls asleep quickly and he leaves, slipping a note under Kris's door to let her know about Blue's breakdown on his way out.
Twins
When Brian visited the next day everything was normal. They talked about their new project and she showed him one of her ideas. One wall would have sketched and painted images of twins. Blue and Mike would be the first. Then Meah and Chase- their half brother and sister. Next would be Brian's twins. Thereafter it would be any pair of twins to visit Michael's Room.
What Deus Suggests
She ventured out of the apartment. High on a roof she loses herself in thought, going over everything. The air on her face feels nice, being up high feels even nicer. Away from everyone.
Then he shows up. Deus. She'd both wanted to see him and dreaded to see him. She told him so. She told him about what had happened, about what the Black's and Frisco had done. That she had seen and felt what she thought was him. He didn't take away her guilt but told her she could feel it if it was justified. He understood her. At one point he put his hand on her shoulder. It scared her and he took it off, apologizing. Though she told him not to apologize because it was her that was broken.
He believes Mike is still alive. He wants her to believe it to. He also told her something she should have expected. Brian had plans to find and kill Frisco for what he'd done. She'd have to talk to Brian about that. She didn't want him anywhere near that man. While Blue had suspected that Frisco was one of the men she'd been tricked to see as someone else, Deus confirmed it.
As for her fear, he suggested was that it was her perceived mind control that she felt the most guilty about. That being the case she could try to overcome it by engaging in sexual activity with someone who would willingly let her mind control them. The youth culture of Japan and circles of American youth consider it a kink, he says, to be mind controlled.
This shocked her. Though it shouldn't have. Either way she's married. Deus knows that. His opinion is that Zarp, considering his absence, would probably not be adverse to a more open relationship. She honestly thinks he wouldn't care, that if he cared he would have contacted her somehow. She can't blame him. She's always known she was but a drop in a bucket. That doesn't make it hurt any less.
The sooner you realize that the you that you are is a fine thing to be, the happier you will be.
They talk about Mike and Lexi and the Beta Unit. She asks him to keep an eye out on Lexi, fearful of what might be going on in the woman's mind. She promises him that she won't be confusing the Mikes. He also makes a request for her to tell Mr. Zen that he'd like to speak to him. He doesn't share what it's regarding but she sends a message over the comm anyway.
Afterwards they smile. Or rather.. she does and he tries. She can't help but laugh. Without a thought she steps forward and tries to help him, fingers guiding his lips. His teeth fascinated her. Though she should have been more careful. Razor sharp they sliced the middle and pointer finger of her right hand. Immediately they separated and he wrapped those fingers together with gauze. When they go their own ways she realizes that she feels a little better. Though she won't do as he suggested.. in no way could she.. his presence in her life helps.
The Obvious Gets Said
She lays there with the music up loud. Brian shows up just like he does every day. Talking. Lots of talking. He heals the slices from Deus's teeth. Curling up on the couch he joins her there, her toes barely touching his leg. Don't go after Frisco, she asks.
I want him dead.
She does. More than anything. But she doesn't want to see Brian hurt. He says he won't go seeking him but that's all he can promise. Then the conversation turns to what Deus had suggested. Brian was angry and frustrated that Deus would suggest such a thing! Lovemaking, he said, was what she should be working towards. Not fucking. Blue could only be frustrated. She's not sure she knows the difference anymore. For that matter she feels like she did before so long ago. With Ramon. With all those she thought she loved and with all the confusion of sex and feelings and what she wants or needs. Now Zarp's gone and she's alone.
But she's not alone. She has a few friends who are right beside her. Brian. She thanks him, offering her hand to hold for a few minutes. He cares and she's thankful. Thank you. She wants him to know how much she appreciates his friendship. She'd do the same for him. Be there for him.
Love you.
He says it. He says it and reassures her that she doesn't have to say it back. Nothing will stop him from being there for her. The moment he said it she thought it was over. That since she couldn't respond, wouldn't be able to give him that type of love back, he might turn away. So many in her past had. He says he won't. She doesn't have to promise anything, say anything, do anything. She can put it out of her mind because all he wants is to see her better, to see her safe and sound and whole.
"I'm married. I'm... alone. I'm scared.. I'm broken. Things are so fucked up and ya deserve... Not me, Brian, not me. Please."
Of course he had an answer for all of it. At least for everything but the first- that she was married.
Don't think about it, he says. He doesn't have to be her lover to care for her and make her better.
Brian: "What is important is being able to hold someone again."
Blue: "...And if that person.. if all I can give is a hand or a hug and never anythin' more to you?"
What follows is a sorrowful and fearful conversation between the two. She doesn't want to lose him like she lost the others, those whose love she couldn't return. He promises to stay.
So she gives him a hug. It doesn't mean anything. It's not a promise. It's just something she wants to do. He deserves a hug. So they hug for a few minutes. She's stiff and trembling but stays there until it becomes too much and she whimpers. "Let me-". He lets her go before she's finished asking and she's stepped away. They talk for a bit more before he tells her she needs to get some sleep. He leaves after they plan to meet the next day to watch the Doctor Who Christmas Special. He'll bring over the DVD and she'll have snacks made.
Differences
This time it was Founder's Falls instead of Talos. Off in a far corner she found a quiet area where she could lean against a tree and just... be.
Deus found her there. He always finds her. They talked. A lot of the conversation dealt with the differences between him and her, between him and humans. His siblings. They talked about them. Particularly his dead sister. Rage is all he could feel at her death. No mourning, no sorrow. Despite the fact that Blue thinks it might be better not to be feeling all that she is, she wouldn't want to not feel the loss of her brother.
He asked her perceptions of him. She wishes he could feel and understand. He seems cold. Except when they've fought. It's then that she knows he's alive. It's hard for her to explain accurately.
What does a massage feel like to you?
She tries to explain, just thinking of that close a physical act a bit difficult. But she tries. And fails. He can't understand her descriptions of "Rough", "Crave" and "Good" among plenty of other words. Inside she knows that there's one way she could possibly show him, to make him understand. Mindwalking. But she doesn't offer. She can't. The thought of doing it scares her. It's possible she may never be able to do it again. This scares her even more. Luckily he doesn't push. Instead he asks if she has more questions. She can't think of any. He on the other hand does have one for her.
Will she take vengeance out on the Blacks and on Frisco?
No. Personally she won't. She can't. Anger and fear boil to the surface. More fierce than she's ever known.
I want them dead.
He's afraid she'll get twisted like his brother, that hatred will blind her and change her. But she's adamant. She wants them dead. She wants to be free and not to be scared anymore.
I can do these things if you wish.
He could. But she tells him not to. He made an oath and even if it technically isn't in affect anymore she doesn't want to bring Mr. Zen down upon her head. That's a man she doesn't like.
In the end he said he'd do as she said. He wouldn't kill them.
Drawing a Crowd
It was about time Blue turned on her comm. When she did.. surprisingly.. there were plenty of people around to meet and spend time relaxing with. Brian, Kris, Claire, Anh, and Mark. For just a bit, until he disappeared into thin air was a man called Will. The conversation ranged from everything to anything. Eventually Brian had to go too, running off without a word as he is wont to do. More people showed up: Rei-Lin and Vanessa. They were random drop-ins to the gathering. One of Mark's friends, Jovi showed up too. Her flaming monkeys, Monkeybutt pink monkeys so named by Kris, were quite interesting. A few things touched a nerve but she kept it all within her control. Mark thought she and Brian were dating and Claire brought up finding Frisco. During a discussion on suits- everyone seems to be wearing them lately- Blue made it plain she doesn't like them. Though... she's been thinking. If she WERE to go back on patrol she just might wear one. All she has to do is talk to Kris about making her one.
Later, after everyone had left but Jovi and Mark, they discussed fashion design. Blue had an idea. She asked Jovi to draw up some designs for simple yet unique clothing for every age range and body style. Something her Safehouses and Lyra House could use for those who pass through their doors. Blue wants designs and will have some of her interested girls draw up some too. If Jovi turns out to have something to offer she'll hire her. AND give her a girl as an apprentice. The girls and those families deserved to feel special. Clothing can do that. Now.. to find out if the girl can do it.
Coming down to Mark and her they delved into more personal conversation. Fighting styles. Her claws. His punches. Killing. They've both done it. Him with the Resistance. Her in the Isles years before and while under the influences of the bracer. Her mental abilities and why he wouldn't want them. Then it moved on to him.
His family, his place in Tangent, his missing brother. He should involve Tangent, she says. Ask for help. Be a part of things instead of standing at the edge. He may leave in the future but for now she insists he should make friends, should try harder to relate. He's been avoiding attachments but he knows it can't stay that way. He needs support and backup. She's offering her friendship and through her she hopes things will get better for him. And for his primary concern. Praetoria. She asks if it came before Tangent and he's honest. It depends. She understands.
Friends.
Then the D. She hadn't been there since.. before. It scares her but she's willing to try. When they get there they head to the Chalet. She's stiff and tense, hands shaking that she hides by crossing her arms. Constantly she looks around. Is Frisco nearby? Will she see anyone from her memories? She's scared, very scared... but as long as Mark doesn't leave her. He doesn't expect a miracle. Then Brian shows up. Together they go to the Tiki lounge, looking for something quieter. They talk about how Mark should travel overseas. He was a bit frustrated that Blue was having a hard time dealing with being there but when she reminded him that she's a big girl.. he relaxed.
She tells him a little about the Silvermoon Pub and Inn and then Brian's gone. Yeah... he's a ghost. It increases her fear of where she is but she's okay for a little bit. They talk a little about her past before Mark suggests they leave. They walk to the D's link to the portal grid. He's going back to the Station and she's headed back to Kris's. When he steps through the portal she realizes she's alone. Fear kicks in and she flies. Fast. Soon she's home, heart racing. But she can smile. She thinks Mark's a good guy and that they'll have a good friendship. She also expects him to start mingling and building attachments. He better! Or Else!
Wishes and Kisses
She was sitting and thinking in Talos over a week since she'd last seen Deus. He found her there and they talked. She told him of what Brian had said. Deus saw nothing wrong with it. She, on the other hand, disagrees. They talk about her fear. They talk about what he wishes for himself. To feel and taste and most importantly to have a soul. She's always said he has one. He says she's wrong. A bit into the conversation she suggests that she help him experience things. Mentally. Hopefully that would bypass the limitations of his body. He said no, suggesting that maybe it could happen in the future. He doesn't have a human mind. It's far deeper and he's afraid she'd get hurt. This frustrates her as she wants desperately to do it.
Why?
He's safe. He said he was safe, that's why she talks about love with him. Love is on her mind. A lot. She's still considering doing something to end her marriage. Zarp hasn't returned in months. She's becoming numb to what she feels for him. Maybe that's out of necessity. But Deus is safe.
Or is he? She wants him to feel something. He's one of the few that's stayed close and never revealed their love, their intentions. Because he has none. Not to mention that she's been in his mind before and there's a craving for it. It's scary. That's what she experienced during her torture. Sharing with him, being the one to make a difference- to change him. That lingers inside even though she knows that's not real. Maybe that's because part of it IS real. There's a part of her that wants to be the one- Maybe that scares her. What they brought to bear against her was her own desires and wants. That control they had.. that's what terrifies her.
Before long Deus had to leave and she was left alone. To think.
Then to float. Half her body she submerged, resting on a rock still in Talos.
Brian showed up there.
Joining her on the rock, still dressed, he got comfortable. They talked too. Starting with cloud shapes and then moving to how she's been doing. Eventually he gave her a present: An amulet in the shape of an hourglass, framed in crystal and with a small glowing light in the middle.
So you don't have to be alone when you don't want to be."
That glow is a part of his soul. If she clicks it open then that piece will flow back to Brian, telling him where it came from. If she ever needed him then he'd be there. Once closed the piece of soul returned. She wanted to cry. He didn't have to. This meant a lot. It also reminded her of the necklace she'd given Ryu. She put that necklace around her neck, removing the one that Zarp had given her for her birthday. Zarp's pendant she wrapped around her left ankle instead, thereby still keeping it close. What step that is she can only guess.
He reminds her of his intentions. She's not sure anything will come of it, reminds him she's not the right person. But he knows the good side. She tells him of the bad side but he's still persistent. Her Feral side. That's a part of her she wants him to understand.
You don't let it control you, Blue. That's the difference.
They say that but they just don't understand how much she WANTS to let it control her, how she has to let it occasionally. Except Deus. He understands. Zarp did to, to a degree. She had to think so she left. Touching his cheek briefly and saying "thank you" she flew away as fast as she could.
He showed up at Kris's apartment later that night. Pretty late even. He found her busy sketching and painting, trying to get it just right the first twins who'd be on the wall of Michael's Room in Lyra House. One pair of faces she didn't even seem to register however. The Blacks. The Twins. Her torturers. She'd sketched and even started on the painting but was oblivious to its presence. Brian gave her a picture of True and Shiloh- his twin boys- so she could begin sketching them. He immediately pulls out a wallet with plenty of pictures and offers her one. Taking it she starts a sketch. She's focused as she does, humming to herself while glancing back and forth between picture and paper. After she's added a thin base painting to both sketches she adds something else. Taking a good hard look at Brian she sketches him too. She doesn't paint him. Instead she leaves him in pencil- shaded. Sitting back she grabs a pair of scissors and cuts the trio out, leaving plenty of room in the square around the drawing. Then she hands it over to him.
He accept it graciously. Another drawing for his bedroom. They talk a little bit more until Blue's tired and they begin to say goodnight. The conversation turns to children. Blue's adamant she's no Mom material, that she's not the type of woman any kid should have as a part of their life. He says they'll have to agree to disagree on the subject. He can disagree all he wants but it won't change the truth of who and what she is. Feral. Wild. Deadly. Dangerous.
Am I an idiot, Blue?
Of course he isn't. She knows that. And he'd trust her with his kids. That worries her. She doesn't trust herself and he shouldn't trust her either. Finally they make it to the door. She's tired. They talk for a few seconds and she slowly shuts the door. Their faces get close to each other but she stops. She can't. Part of her would like to try a kiss but she's still married and she doesn't want to encourage him. He's already professed his love so if she gives him hope without reciprocating she might lose him. She can't lose him. Just before she closes the door he says they should watch Dr. Who again the next day. She agrees and shuts the door. It's bedtime.
Being Yourself
She wants to be like she was. A carefree sexual being. Teasing, flirting, laughing and dancing. But that's hard right now. Really hard. Brian helps with that. It's a coincidence that she talks for a few seconds to Mark on the comm- a guy who she's trying to get to open up to everyone. Blue's just enjoying a book and some music when Brian stops by this time. They talk about the clinic and they tease. Just a little. Her feet. She puts them on him and then takes them off. Then she considers putting them back on but she's afraid she'll encourage him, afraid he'll take things wrong. He notices her attitude and asks what's wrong.
So she tells him. She's scared. He tells her not to be. That only her saying the words will encourage him.
Swear to me, Brian.
Swear, she says. Swear that he won't take anything she does as leading him on, as meaning she feels anything for him in that way.
Only the words, Blue. I swear.
She believes him. Settling back she places her feet back onto his leg, even allowing him to give her a footrub because it'd feel good! Eventually she had to pull away. Before the thoughts and feelings and memories rose to far to the surface. He understood. They continued talking, this time about two of his daughters from other timelines. Two that had been raped. All in all it led to him assuring her she'd get past this, get past what was done and become herself again. He's persistently optimistic.
Probably too Soon
The arena. It comes up that they should fight sometime. Impulsive and wanting desperately to feel something she suggests "Now". So they go. During the fight he takes her down, over and over. As it goes on she becomes more feral, more determined to take him down- to make him STAY down. She sees, she remembers. As she fights she can feel the pain of her torture, remember wanting it to never stop and to never start all at the same time. When it's over and they teleport back to Kris's she stumbles and finds a seat on a chair.
She overwhelmed by it all. She WANTS to feel and lash out. In the arena she wanted it to end. For a few minutes she wanted everything to end. Now in the apartment she trembles and realizes she lost it. Kneeling beside her, Brian holds her hand tightly. They won't be going back there for awhile.
This anger has to come out. Deus. She'll need to find him. Maybe he'll fight her. Hurt her. Maybe she can hurt him, if she can keep from thinking of him on top of her amid other thoughts.
Brian doesn't know her, he doesn't understand the feral side of her. His love for her is misplaced, she knows it. But he won't listen. A brief touch to his cheek and then she's pulling away completely. Standing she lets him use is magical (more like Divine) scalpel to heal her many bruises from the fight.
As he leaves he comments that she has an urge to spoil kids- referring to her telling him to give the lollipops to the kids. That's a good sign, he says. All she can say is that she doesn't know anything about kids. He needs to know that, needs to know she could never be a mom. Sure he didn't know a thing about kids either and sure he didn't expect to be a dad as a robot but...
What she is is something far worse than that. Or so she believes.
He reminds her that she knows where to find him if she needs him- the amulet. Once the door is shut behind him she whispers "I know" and then returns to her book. Though she doesn't get much reading done- her thoughts askew and flying in every direction.
She Believes Him
Blue enjoyed a long lunch with Zoe. Subs and girl talk. Relaxing. Then it was paperwork and thinking. Brian stopped in a little earlier than usual but she was glad for the company. Finishing up enough of her paperwork she shared a decision she'd made. The next day she'd go to Nepal and visit her parents. The first one since she'd been rescued. He made it clear he'd like to meet her parents, especially her Dad. It's hard to not see that as bring him too close, encouraging him. But she tries to put that out of her mind. She'll ask Lexi to go with her. Mike's fiance and Blue have meta a few times and even hugged. They'd shared their sorrow and Blue was told there was nothing to forgive, it wasn't her fault. Lexi understands.
They're family.
She also talked to Ms. Metropolis over the Tangent comm system. The woman's reputation precedes her and they'd already talked once before. Blue was surprised to learn the girl has not one but three fan clubs. Blue would just like to know how the hero is using that type of fame. Now more than ever she wants to see heroes making a REAL difference in the every day lives of the common person.
Zarp. Brian and Blue discuss him. They discuss the marriage and what she should do. He's been gone a long time. She'd be worried but it's his nature to be more than she is, to encompass more in his life than her small insignificant existence. She can't blame him. She's trying to get past it. Didn't she, at their wedding, promise she'd treasure what time they had together? No matter how long that was? Surely she hadn't thought that it would be only six or so months more but it was a promise. As time goes on and Zarp doesn't return it becomes more likely she'll have it annulled or somehow ended. Not for Brian but for herself. For healing. To set him free and herself.
He wishes the Draconian was there too. He does. Despite whether or not it would keep him and Blue from ever being lovers he wants to see her heal above all else. Looking into his eyes she believes him. And that matters. That depth of friendship matters a lot. She tells him so, offering her hand and a silent thank you.
They enjoy sandwiches Brian makes and talk about Lexi's baby. Blue hopes it'll be a boy. Then the talk turns to him. She wants to know about how he came into existence, how long he's been around, what his life was like in the beginning and before she knew him. She wants to know him. So she listens. What she hears angers her. Her hand rests on his knee, reminding him that she's there and listening. He talks about not having control and she understands that. He broke through, overrode his programming with the help of a woman he loved. His first wife. She listens and occasionally asks questions. They talk for a little bit about that and then she asks him to leave. She has a night with Kris planned.
Tomorrow. Tomorrow he'll come back and they'll watch Dr. Who.
Halves of the Same Whole
A few minutes after Brian had the door shut on him Mike's replica showed up. He knocked and she let him in. Only he didn't appear as Mike. Instead he'd altered his appearance and his voice. He'd done so for Lexi and was doing it for Blue as well, he said. To help ease the burden and to help them heal. Blue smiled. She definitely appreciated it. Here was a man who she'd had no memories of and could look at without fear. His reason for coming was to explain more about what he knew. He wanted her to understand.
Half. Twins, she knew. No, he said. Not twins. The Iradu had purged Mike of what would most make him unable to complete his missions, unable to act as a superweapon- emotions, empathy... humanity. Thus she'd come into existence. Half of him. Mike, therefore, was her physical prowess and strength purged- the epitome of purpose and what can be weaponized within a human being. Half of her. Not twins at all. They didn't start that way but were manipulated to become what they are. Her psionic abilities, no matter their influences from the METAchron, began there. They developed because of what she IS.
They're stronger together. They fit the mold as one person together. It's only because of Mike's interactions with humans that he gained back the humanity that was put into his "sister". It was people and their feelings, their actions, that turned him from the weapon he was supposed to become and into the man he is.
As for what they'd intended with Blue beyond being the unwanted, the disposable part of Mike, he doesn't know. He wishes he did.
She took this in, thinking about his words. It gave meaning in a way to what she is, with why she feels as she does with Mike. The bond they share. They didn't talk much more before Beta, the name he's asked her to call him instead of Mike, left.
Decisions Made
It was a long night. Movies, Hot Pockets and conversation. Lots of stark and frank conversation. They talked about Beta had said, about her origins.
They also talked about Blue's fear, her wish that Zarp was there and anger that he wasn't. Blue's best girl pointed out something that she had never considered:
"You ain't married, not in any way a reasonable justice'd say so, anyway. Hell, Zarp ain't even HUMAN, so the marriage don't have a legal binding on you."
There was truth in that. He wasn't human. He also wasn't there and hadn't been there most of the time he -was- there. That night she decided she would end her marriage. The next morning she ventured to City Hall and there signed the papers that would annul her marriage. If Zarp ever returned they'd talk and see where things went. But never marriage. He was free in a way she could never be again. She also needed someone here, someone beside her. Life couldn't just be about fun anymore.
Maybe she'd grown up.
Another decision was made by morning. She would push past her fear to touch. It wasn't her fault. She had control of herself. That's all she needed right now. Control of herself. She wouldn't force anything, it wasn't her. The combination of time with Kris and both conversations pushed her past that last block. While there were still fears and memories she would get over it. She had to.
For Mike.
As she and Lexi went to Nepal and she was taken into the arms of her parents she wept. She was loved. She was meant to be something more than the feral creatures, that monster. What part of her that had come from... it was people. Her experiences. Just as Mike had gained humanity she had lost some of hers. Two halves.
Ferality was there and she would face it when she needed to. But she wouldn't let it control her. That day she told her parents her name. She told Lexi as well. When Mike returned she'd give that gift to him as well.
He would return. She believed that now. She needed her other half and he needed her.
Do What?
Lexi's met a Mike. A teenage boy calling himself Hero Prime who's determined that everyone should believe he is. Vagary, Blue's sister, is adamant he is. The energy signatures are identical. Her parents warned her about him and Blue knows but she doesn't believe it's him. Though it could be. She'll wait and see.
You're Just Like the Rest
She's happy. Blue's last few days have been the happiest since returning. She's smiling when Brian comes over. She's baking cookies. I ended my marriage, she tells him. She had a great time with her parents. Blue even steps over and gives him a hug. His first since her rescue.
The small fades a few minutes later.
His old friend's returned. She's returned and professed her love. She's special.
All Blue can do is ask him to take it back, to take his words back. It stings to her core. A man offers his love and when she can't offer what he wants something else comes along.
She lets him off the hook even though it rips at her heart. No.. she wasn't sure if this would ever go anywhere but this.. she didn't expect. But she should have.
No sex. No relationship. No love returned on her part. But someone else offers. And he's feeling guilty for wanting to take it. That means he wants it. She goes off on him and he says he wants to stay.
It's too late.
She says no. She wants him to take it back. She was a rebound. She can't be his lover and someone else can. It's the same old same old and it hurts. Yet she doesn't let him see just how much.
Take it back. That's what she asks. He won't.
What does she want, he asks?
I want to find someone who won't waltz in and tell me they love me and then somethin' else comes along. I want someone ta stay. I want to not have to wait and wonder just when it'll drop and things'll go fuckin' crazy. I don't want ta see my own failures and faults and fears gettin' tossed back in my face cause I can't go fuck up a storm with someone. You're my friend. I'm gonna stay your friend... but I don't want ta have it naggin' at me that I couldn't give you what ya want so a better offer came along! So.. what I want is for you to take it back.
He listens and decides. He wants to stay. Because of hope.
She says no. There's nothing worth staying for. He can have something she can't and most likely will never give.
But that does nothing to dissuade him. He'll stay. Because it's worth it to him. He has hope that someday she'll return his feelings.
Hope.
Her answer to that?
"Fuck hopin' that someday I'll be your lover. Fuck it all. What ya feel for her has ta rival whatever ya feel for me and there's no hope required for her. So go screw your brains out and just.. be happy. Smile and laugh and forget what ya thought ya felt because it wasn't what ya thought. Don't even take it back... just.. let it die. Please."
Blue walks out the door and takes flight. Soon she's in Talos, standing on an island and trying to clear her head. Her heart races. She didn't love Brian. At least not yet. Then again maybe she never would have. He was afraid to tell her, afraid to be like all the others in her past.
Dammit she'd TOLD him this happens! This should have never been about love. She's angry. He should never have told her. If he'd never had said anything then this old friend would have come into his life and he'd never had been forced to feel guilty about wanting to pursue it. So she breathes the chilly air and shivers. There's still Lyra House and the Clinic. They have to remain friends. That's what's most important. Tonight she needs to get past this and accept it.
They find her in Talos. Brian appears and tells her he's telling his friend no. That he'll wait and hope for Blue. She's angry. VERY angry. She can't persuade him so she unsheathes her claws, eyes rimmed in pink, and steps towards him. Deus makes his presence known but Brian stops him.
He won't go. He'll stay. He has hope. She's adamant he doesn't understand. He changes into his robot armor and gives her permission to fight him. She almost laughs. That's not release! It's blood she wants to draw. To have someone hurt like she does. Deus does his best to make Brian understand. She can't kill him but she can kill Deus. That opportunity is what makes their battles such a release. Not to mention if she harmed Brian it would compound her residual suffering from her torture.
Blue barely maintains control.
Will you bleed for me?
He would but she has no desire to battle him. In fact he cuts his finger and bleeds. It brings her closer to attacking him.. despite her wish not to. Eventually Deus convinces him to leave. Out of love for her. As he leaps away Brian says one word.
"Hope."
And Blue loses it. She arches her back and growls, turning on Deus. He asks if she wants this- taunting. She does. And the battle ensues.
Claws and Fists
They taunt. She's glad to see the blood she draws on his chest and feel the heat of it from the wound on his side. His first attack is a kick to her ribs that break more than one or two. She laughs at that despite the pain. He breaks her hand with his fist and then crushes her foot. Lifting in the air to avoid pain on her foot he casts dirt in her eyes and gets her to turn with a rock for distraction. He jumps and entangles her- his arms and legs wrapping around hers- and squeezes. She has the presence of mind to use her telekinesis to lift them both. As he squeezes he slams his face into hers- breaking her nose. The blood pours out and down into her throat... making her breathing even more difficult causing her to gurgle and choke. After tightening a bit more he suddenly releases her and the sudden influx of air causes her to pass out. She drops to the ground. Deus is dropped the moment she can't maintain her telekinesis.
Deus knelt beside her and checked her wounds. Broken ribs and it's possible that they're piercing something they shouldn't be. Finding a frequency Martin monitors she requests she be teleported to the Tangent Medbay. Once she's gone Deus pours ammonia all over the area of their battle. In the medbay she's tended to by Dr. Michael Ferris. He sedates her, focusing on setting the bones and injecting her with calcium to help things along. That done he'd let the reclimators do their healing thing.
Unlike before her mind doesn't fight, sedation doesn't release her mind. Something's changed since her torture. It's possible she no longer needs a dampener! Though she won't know that until she wakes up and that won't be for hours. Just to be safe she's kept for observation until later the next day.
Regrets
When she did wake up she thought over a lot of things. Especially her conversation with Brian. Shit. Going over her own words she realizes she might have given him encouragement, might have made it seem like she WANTED him to stay. Laying back on a bed in the Tangent Medical Facility she stares at the ceiling. She'd told him what she wanted but she hadn't been thinking of him when she said it. It was an overall feeling. He'd regret his choice, she knew he would. There was nothing between them other than a friendship. Every other feeling for him was.... cold.
He wouldn't understand or accept that, she knew. Brian was stubborn and always had been. What would be best for him would be to accept the love his old friend had offered. A sure thing verses hope. Blue WANTS him to back away. With all her being she wants those words from him never to have been said. Damn him for not taking it back, for not listening to her.
Closing her eyes she mouths two words. "I'm sorry."
She's sorry for his hope, sorry for her own lack of feelings towards him, sorry that the feral side of her is something he doesn't understand.
Now she'll have to quietly wait until the day he too is sorry.
Taking it Back
Brian visits her later the next day.
"I take it back."
He'll bury the feelings and ignore them. They'll go back to being the best of friends. She asks what's changed his mind. After all they'd been through the night before she wants to know why.
It had hurt her. That was the crux of it. He's seen how much he was hurting her.
She offers a hand but pulls it back. He offers his and she takes it, squeezing. She knows he never meant to. Happy. That's what she wants him to be. His kids should have a Mom they deserve. He wants her to be happy too. He'd thought he could be the one to do that for her but now he knows he won't be. All she can say back with a grin is, "Told ya."
This breaks the barrier and things... are back to normal. Just like that they've past that hurdle. Whether he might still believe he loves her doesn't matter. It's not an issue and for that she's very grateful. They're both glad to move on.
Friends, forever.
After that it became a normal night's conversation. Lyra House and the Clinic. Paperwork etc. Teasing and laughing. She also told him about what Beta had said about her and Mike. Soultwins. That's what Brian called that relationship of halves.
Eventually they danced. Brian moved the couch and they started slow with a classical one two three one two three. Then Blue's spirit embraced the freedom of the dance and she lost herself in the moves, in the act akin to worship.
For close to two hours! By the time they're done they are both covered in sweat. With flushed skin Blue lays on the couch and he takes a seat nearby. She'd missed the dance. Their conversation considers at pace- including a mention of the muse Terpsichore- until she eventually shoos him out the door.
Shower and then a wonderful night's sleep for her.
He Steps out of the Past
A random goon found Blue as she was shopping. He had a message. Don Giordano wanted to see her, to meet with her in their old hang out spot in Sharkhead Isle. After being dumbfounded she got up the gumption and went to meet him.
When she got there it was like looking at the past. Same coat, same hat, same spot. He was surprised she'd showed up. She had every right not to come, he said. He was right but all she said was "maybe".
He asked about how she's been and she gives no details. Not yet. He gives a little bit of a summary and then:
"Been spendin' a lotta time beatin' myself up."
Don is apologizing. Wow. She's shocked. She actually doesn't say she accepts it.. just that she's surprised he is. His pride has kept him from doing so before now. Now that she's not surprised about. They get into general conversation and her kidnapping comes up. She gives him the names of who did it and he'll look into finding them. She asks him to leave the Twins in the Zig and to not kill Frisco. Tangent wants to talk to them.
Telling him about Tangent she has to tell him about her family and he's happy for her.
When he asks how she's doing for cash he offers yet another surprise. An envelope. In that envelope is a check for a large sum of money. The check is stamped Blue Giordano" Company. It's her pay. It's money he says is hers because she's a shareholder if not a partner in his shipping business. He'd asked to use her name a long time ago and she'd agreed.
What does he want from her in regard to it? Nothing. Just that he'll send money and she never has to see him again if she doesn't want. She can't change his mind and part of her's glad. That money will go along way to helping with Lyra House.
He won't ask for her back. She won't let him anyway. What he has asked for is friendship and that she's willing to do. After all, at one time they were really good friends. They exchanged cards with their numbers. He's reminded her she's welcome at the Restaurant and his Villa. She would like to visit his family. She's got fond memories of them. Though she was saddened to hear that Don's father had died a year before.
They parted as friends. She back to Paragon City- where he's glad she's at now- and he to New York where most of his business is.
She tells Her Girl
Blue finds Kris not long after returning to Paragon. Up on a rooftop where it's easy to clear your head they chat a bit. Unbeknownst to Blue, Rodney- Kris's bot- had followed her to the Isles. Blue hadn't thought of the fact she was alone in Frisco's territory. A stupid mistake. One she won't repeat. Now.
They make plans for the night in and Blue tells her about the money from Don. All $5,000,000 of it. As they talk about it Blue brings up a good point. She wants to keep living with Kris. And.. she wants to bypass rent for buying the place. Not the apartment building.. but pay the landlord enough that he never collects rent again. Kris is fine with it. So... roomies again!
Then... talk moves on to the battles between Deus and Blue which Kris hates. She's not an animal. Kris thinks Blue's acting the victim and Deus is an asshole for enjoying the battles, let alone thinking Blue needs them.
Eventually Blue says she can't promise anything but she'll think about it.
He Ruins It
They were supposed to have a good night. Her and Kris. Instead Kris doesn't come home till late. When she does she walks right past Blue and into her room, slamming the door. Blue makes her way back to her door. Her best girl suggests Blue not bother her. But Blue doesn't listen. Heading into the room she's confronted with some news.
They'd went after Frisco and when they did, Brian had killed him- smashed his head in while he was already captured. Also.. he's referring to himself as Blue's best friend AND he's said he had permission from Blue to commit the murder.
Blue gets angry and does her best to reassure her friend. There was no fight, she doesn't agree with what Brian did. She doesn't understand why Lexi took him along. Not to mention no one will be closer to her than Kris. While she and Brian are the best of friends he's not and never will be her best friend. Her best girl has that place and always will. Further more he didn't have her blessing. She wanted Frisco dead just... not the way it was done. Without a fight? That's cowardly.
And he fucked up her night!
Toss in that by killing Frisco he's jeopardized their chances at finding Mike! Brian should have known that more than Frisco's death she would want her brother back.
She makes sure that Kris knows she'll never let her go back to prison. Ever. She'll do anything to keep it from happening even if it means using her mental abilities on whoever she needs to. Finally she offers her a massage.. something to calm her. But Kris doesn't want to be touched. This frustrates Blue who's all about touching, especially if you need comforting.
But she doesn't press. Kissing the top of the woman's head she leaves the room, reminding the mechanic that she's in the other room and is there if she needs. Then, shutting the door a little hard, she makes her way to her room cursing under her breath.
In her room she growls and mutters. He's messed everything up!
They're done.
Lyra House... The construction hadn't started and now it won't be.
She's angry. Not the kind of angry to battle Deus but very, very angry.
Resolved, she'll meet with him soon. When she does... there will be hell to pay.
Taking the Fall
Lexi showed up hours later to talk to Kris. Blue sat in on the conversation and what she heard made her even more ANGRY. The video shows Kris clear enough. And Brian. But all the other people are blurred out! Lexi had tried to report it and was blocked, saying it already had. They were suspicious and so Lexi thought it prudent to go speak with Kris and get things straight.
Kris is taking the fall, keeping Tangent from the full brunt of what's happened. Blue argues but loses the argument. Tangent will provide any legal help, the best lawyers. Those involved will have to keep their mouths shut and not admit they were there. Lexi has many conversations coming up so she leaves to go make some of those calls. She has to report to the PPD Peregrine Station first thing in the morning.
In the early hours Kris is arrested. Lexi confirms that she heard about the murder from Kris. Blue follows, waiting. Kris is eventually remanded into Tangent's custody- with the assurances that Martin will monitor her whereabouts at all times. She's being charged as an accessory to murder.
However later, Lexi calls. She's changed her mind and isn't going along with it. She's at the PPD and will set everything straight. Unfortunately.. that means Kris can be charged with Evidence Tampering. But at least it's not murder.
Disappointment and Trouble
Brian calls Blue. He wants to talk. They meet in The Rikti War Zone, on a rooftop not far from the Vanguard base. From the moment he arrives she lays into him. How dare he?! But.. he doesn't understand. He's fine with what he did. Except he says he didn't know they were planning to use Frisco to help find Mike. However, that's not the point, Blue thinks. He should have trusted Tangent, respected the members of the group she belongs to. He shouldn't have had needed information or a reason to NOT kill him when he was in custody.
They argued but neither would bend. Finding out he was an Arbiter, and therefore a War Criminal in the US, she choose to try and arrest him. Phasing, he made it impossible for her to do so. His charges don't matter. He's got permission to do what he wants if he claims himself the Arbiter position.
He doesn't agree with the laws Tangent follows. He doesn't think Blue's doing what's really right.
In the middle of that argument a man in armor and a mask appeared. Red and black clad he looked at Blue. She had something he'd come to claim. Brian of course jumped between Blue and the man, acting as protector. Blue wanted to know what he wanted and who he was. She got no answer. Instead the two men began to squabble.
A necromancer the newcomer did his best to gain control of Brian- who being a ghost and dead creature would normally have been vulnerable to his abilities. He failed. After a few attempts they went all out. The Necromancer called up his zombies and undead. They beat down Brian while fending off Blue who couldn't use her mind abilities on things without minds. Once Brian couldn't get up and Blue was down she was asked three times if she would willingly allow for her blood to be taken.
Of course she said no. After the third, according to the law of magic, he had permission to take it by force. So.. force it was. His zombie minions stripped her. Blue fought with all her mental abilities but all it did was anger him. Brian stood, casting Holy Water, but still the man turned on him. A syringe was tossed to the Necromancer's Lich and Blue's blood was taken. Once that was done he revealed who he was by virtue of mentioning his younger brother.
She now knew who this masked man was. Baeroth. Deus's brother.
His Lich took the vial of blood he'd collected and left. Blue stood and Baeroth went to leave. As he was doing so Mr. Zen's voice was heard in the air and Blue was teleported to the other side of the roof. A little disoriented for a few moments she recovered enough to head back to get her clothes. Brian called her name as she past him and she could only ask, "What?!"
He was sorry he couldn't stop them. But she doesn't care that he didn't. He's not her protector. What's happened hasn't changed their argument or what he's done.
Turning. He gives her privacy to dress. Once she's turned around Mr. Zen lands between them. He confronts Brian, telling him a few things. Not the least of which is that he owes a Debt of Honor to Blue. This comes as a surprise to Blue!
Brian says he wont' stop helping Blue. Blue tries to make it clear that it's over. She yanks the amulet from around her neck and offers it to him.
"Take this back too."
"No."
He refuses. Mr. Zen suggests she leave it on the roof. She asks Brian to take it back once again and still he refuses. He says he'll see her later and starts to fly off.
Blue opens her fist and the amulet falls to the roof. "No. You won't."
Once he's gone Blue turns to Mr. Zen. He says they'll have to talk and they make plans to talk that evening.
Giving it Back
Things change. Drastically.-
Mr. Zen waits as Winston brings Blue into the room. The table is not the standard ostentatious rich-person table. It's short, though of high quality, but has scratches that make it look like it's been used for table hockey.
She looks around as she goes in. She's seen money before. She's been paid plenty to service rich men and women.
He stands as Winston pulls back a chair for Blue. Spread across the table is a wide selection of fruits and raw vegetables, as well as various dips and dressings.
"Please, have a seat, Ms. Jones."
Arching a brow and takes a seat. "Little formal for... talking." She smiles at Winston. She actually likes him. "Thanks." Blue sits lotus style in the chair.
Mr. Zen looks down at the table. "We could go to a more comfortable room if you prefer." He sits down, as well.
She shrugs. "I don't care what room we talk in. It's your house."
He shrugs, turning the palms of his hands upward. "If you were speaking of my attire, I can change that easily enough." He snaps his fingers, and the tuxedo disolves into less formal clothing.
“Better, Ms. Jones?
She chuckles and rolls her eyes. "I said I don't give a damn anythin' about this except to talk." Her eyes don't smile so much, though. Her feelings towards him are plain on her face. “And you can call me Blue.”
He reaches out and takes a stem of grapes in his hand. He plucks one off and tosses it into his mouth. "Ms. Jones, let us not play coy. You have a dislike of me, and to ask me to call you by an informal name under such circumstances is disingenuous."
“It's stiff and borin' and isn't what I go by but fuck you're right. I don't like you. So.. just get on with whatever ya gotta say.”
“And what is it you think I have to say?” Mr. Zen eats another grape. "Please... enjoy the food. And if you would prefer steak, or chicken, or even veal, don't hesitate to ask."
Blue grins. "How 'bout bacon?" She reaches out, taking a radish and munching on it. "AS for what ya have ta say.. I'm hopin' you'll tell me what the hell ya meant back on that roof. Somethin' 'bout a debt? I figure it's more you knowin' a hell of a lot more about me than I do so how's about you get to explainin'? If you'd be so kind." The last is.. yeah... sarcastic. Just a bit.
He gives Winston a nod. The man, in turn, mouths the word 'bacon?', and Mr. Zen nods again. As Winston leaves, Mr. Zen returns his gaze to Blue. "It does have something to do with that, indeed. I, for instance, knew your identity long before you."
“No shit. I kinda.. knew that.”
“Well then, what more would you care to know?”
She narrows her eyes, a slight growl in her words. "You said we should probably talk and ya want ME ta try ta wiggle and beg more information out of you? That's fucked up. You know I want to know what you meant about that Debt. What it is. Hell.. if you want me to ask more.. I'd like to know how much you knew about what I am .. that whole halves thing with my brother. And Beta.. and all the fucked up craziness that's been goin' on." She stops and looks at him. "Are you another person who could see what was happenin' ta me and couldn't -get involved-?" Yeah.. she's wondered that.
He purses his lips. "My reaction was due to your aggression - a trait I find curiously strong in you. I suspect it had something to do with how you and Mr. Mars were created. However, unlike the Beta Unit, I was involved throughout both of your lives. Have you ever wondered, for instance, how you managed to survive so many close calls, things that would have killed others time and again? Have you ever considered where your very abilities stem from? Ms. Jones, you and I are bound together through power and time.
She stares at him. "What do you mean?"
“Close your eyes and think back to the woman who taught you, who opened you up to the power you now enjoy. You'll find it ironic that she is the selfsame Jenna Hagan those vile twins worship so.”
“Woman who taught me? I don't remember that and you can't be sayin' that somehow...”
Mr. Zen waves it off. "Another time. Suffice it to say, the power she passed to you, she thought of as a curse. What she did not know when I gave it to her was that it could not be controlled."
“Power you gave her? Shit.. I've heard about Jenna. YOU gave her power?”
He chuckles softly. "Not the power anyone you know would have seen in her. No, I gave her something much greater. But with such tremendous power comes a tremendous price; you cannot control what is beyond your scope."
Blue has a look of confusion on her face and she looks at him questioningly, actually not backtalking.
“Whenever she tried to exert that power, it ended in paradox, leaving her stranded in alternate worlds or pocket dimensions. She finally reached Primal Earth again, only thirty years in our past, aged by her own lust for power, but tired of trying to control it.”
“And somehow.. she gave it ta me?”
“She gave its essence to you.”
“Which means what?”
He leans forward, his eyes glinting in the light of the room. "Have you ever wondered why you feel the need to fulfill certain urges? Sex. Compassion. Feral tendencies? Have you ever asked why you were like that?"
She leans forward herself. "Of course. I've spent plenty of time wonderin' why the hell I'm like that. I'm sure you know that too.”
He sits back in his chair. "I haven't spent my life reading your mind, Ms. Jones."
Blue laughs. "Never said ya did.. but you're a smart old man." She crosses her arms on the table, still leaning a little. She stares at him.
Mr. Zen quirks up an eyebrow. "That power within you, it drives those base desires. It is the primordial stuff of creation, aching to reach out.You may never master the art of dancing to its rhythm, but you will always feel its call, until they day you decide to pass it on to another.”
“So it's what she gave me that makes me like this... and I'll have ta pass it on? And I'll always.. feel like this? Deal with this shit? Great.”
“I could make you the same offer I made her.”
“What offer?”
He extends a hand, palm up. "Return it to me."
Blue arches a brow. "If I did that... then what would I be? What would be left that's mine and not yours?"
“You would be you, Ms. Jones. Human. Full of your own compassion and sorrow and joy and free will, unhindered by these drives.”
Blue sits back in the chair. She looks away out a window and gets quiet. "You'd take everythin'. My mindwalkin'... the urge ta battle... all of it?"
He shakes his head. "I would take nothing. This hinges on your desire to pass it on. This is, in essence, your gift to give, not mine to take."
She growls a little and glances back. "Ya know what I fuckin' mean but sure.. I'll word it differently. I'd have ta choose ta give over.. everythin'."
Mr. Zen nods. "Quite so."
“I don't know if I can give that up. No matter all the trouble. I've been like this.. since I can remember.” She frowns slightly.
He just sits there, arm outstretched. "The choice is yours, Ms. Jones."
She stares at his arm, looking at his aged palm. Thoughts rush through her head. Freedom. Kris doesn't want her to fight anymore. This would keep that urge from ever happening like that again. She'd lose her mindwalking ability but look what trouble it's caused. And her work now doesn't even need it. Not really. She takes a few long deep breaths and then looks up at him. She'd be giving over one self that wasn't meant to be her to find another. Blue swallows hard and her eyes flash solid pink. She reaches out and puts her hand in his, palm down. "Take it. Take it back." Hell.. she's said those words so much lately.
He stands from his chair, pushing it back. He walks around the table slowly, eying her the whole way. "If I do this, Ms. Jones, all of this you have will be gone. There will be nothing - but perhaps the abilities passed on by the one who called himself Fenrir. Nothing will remain, except what is you." He holds her hand the entire way. "There is so much good you can do with this power, Ms. Jones. Are you certain you wish to give it up?"
She nods and holds his gaze. A tear slips out. "I'm scared shitless ta give it up but I got people I care about and all this that's around me.. a lot of it's caused because of how fucked up this essence shit's made me. I can do good without it." Blue looks at their hands .. hers trembling... and then to him. "I'm givin' it back."
Mr. Zen nods slowly. "That is all that is needed." He releases her hand, letting it fall. "It is done."
Blue blinks, inhaling sharply. Her hand falls but she seems not to notice. "I..."
He arches both brows. "Yes, Ms. Jones?"
She looks down at her hands. "I can feel that it's different. It's quiet and still." She smiles a little, tears slipping out. "No urges, nothing clawing at me." She inhales sharply again and closes her eyes. "There's nothing but everything there."
He slowly walks back to his chair. His eyes are wet, but he dabs at them with a napkin.
Blue leans her head back in the chair and after a few more breaths she wipes at her eyes and looks at him. "I think.. I don't hate you so much now." She grins a little.
Mr. Zen chuckles softly, laying his napkin down. "As much? I am glad to hear I am coming up in the world."
She laughs. "Alright. Maybe I don't hate you at all. But it still bothers me that you knew and didn't tell me."
He nods. "Such is the burden of power, Ms. Jones."
“Yeah.”
He spreads his arms out, indicating the table full of food, just as Winston walks in. "You are welcome to eat, Ms. Jones, unless you have other plans."
“No.. I didn't. I'll want to tell Kris. I'm not sure what I'll do or say to everyone. I will need a ride home though.” Blue closes her eyes for a second, tilting her head, then opens them. She frowns slightly. "I can't fly."
He chuckles, then looks up at his butler. "Winston, will you see to it Ms. Jones gets home? And pack this table up to send with her." Winston bows, and replies, "But of course, sir."
She looks at Winston. "Thanks." She turns back to Mr. Zen. "I'd wanted to talk ta you. About a project of mine."
He nods. "Of course. There are more pressing issues tonight, however. Please, feel free to contact me whenever you wish to speak."
Blue nods and stands. "Alright. I'll do that. I guess a thanks is in order? So.. thanks.”
Mr. Zen waves it off. "No thanks are necessary. What you did tonight was your own choice."
“You offered but I won't argue.” She smiles.
He bows gracefully. "Goodnight, Ms. Jones. Come speak to me when you wish to discuss this project."
“I will.” Blue doesn't bow. She'd feel awkward. “Night.”
Lots to Think about
Blue was driven home. Riding in the back seat of the car driven by Winston she watched the scenery go by. Everything felt..... serene. Simple thoughts and complex feelings that had only been hints before were her only companions. And it was good.
People.
Purpose.
All of those things had to be evaluated- looked at in light of who she really was, who she was now. Once home she took a shower, leaving Kris alone in her room. Once in her own room, in the peace and quiet, Blue sat on the floor. Back to the bed she closed her eyes and smiled.
Thinking. She had lots to think about. Tomorrow morning, first thing, she'd talk to Kris.
Then Blue's life would begin anew, in a way she had never thought possible.
More than Friends?
A long night of thoughts with a few hours of the deepest and most restful sleep Blue's had in over twelve years brought her to a conclusion she hadn't considered before.
She went through each individual in her life, thinking about them through the eyes and mind of a now human woman- without the burden of urges and ferality.
Deus- Respected. A friend. There were no more sexual or battle urges to hamper things.
Brian- What he'd done now weighed more and became more about what she honestly and truly felt regarding right and wrong. Less of it leaned on feelings. He'd been wrong and their friendship was over. That wouldn't and couldn't change. Especially now.
Her Family- Parents. Siblings. People she cared what happened to, that she wanted to get to know and to know her now in a way that she couldn't have before. The feelings are almost overwhelming. She can look back and see what she was like and they loved her anyway.
Kris- Her best girl. Blue's put her through more troubles than anyone else in her life. The mechanic has had to pull her out of scrape after scrape and has stood beside Blue no matter her mistakes. They're truly best friends. But as she thinks it through Blue sees there might be something more to it. They'd lived together for years off and on. While married, Blue had spent many nights on her friend's couch while her husband was away on his many adventures. Even now isn't Blue planning to buy the apartment so that the two can live together without financial strain- particularly on Kris?Unfettered by all the pain and anger and lust of the power she'd given up she could clearly see that there were feelings within herself she hadn't thought about. Now she did. Enjoying her friends company, making her smile, knowing she would be there to come home to. She thought about all that and more. One of the main factors of the decision to return Mr. Zen's power to him was what would be best for Kris. Foremost in her thoughts, when it came to people, was that it would end some of the worries that Kris had. That meant something.
She thought about it and then acted on it, even knowing that Kris has always been heterosexual.
Early in the morning she knocked on Kris's bedroom door, waking the girl up. Once inside she told her about giving her powers back. She also told her that there were some feelings she had for Kris but that Kris would have to make the first move. Blue wouldn't act on it. Wouldn't ask.
Is it love? Blue isn't sure she knows what love is. Everything in the last twelve years has been tainted by that primordial power. Now she was free. She wondered where it would lead. Perhaps into a relationship with Kris? Maybe. If not then their friendship will stay as it is.
Either way... she left that room with a smile on her face and a light heart. It was the first day of the rest of her life.
Two Surprises
Blue had told Kris she'd pay off the rent for the foreseeable future on the apartment they were sharing. However, the more she thought about it the more she wanted to do something that the mechanic would really want. Now Kris had said she had no thoughts on somewhere else but Blue remembered a few different conversations over the last four years - while watching a movie, or talking about work, or just brainstorming about hopes and dreams - when the woman had mentioned a warehouse or a building like it, somewhere with the space to design her own loft area while having a huge area for her workshop.
Happily, Blue made that dream a reality. Or at least set it up to be. Taking some of the money from what Don had given her she purchased a warehouse in Brickstown. She owned it. Keeping the Southern woman blindfolded and making her ride in a taxi she brought Kris inside the doors before revealing the gift.
Of course, at first, shock and unbelief registered in her eyes. Then, after some explanations, the gift was accepted along with a tight and happy hug. Blue only asked that there be room for her in that warehouse.
Then Kris had her own surprise to share.
No one had ever treated her like the former mindwalker. They'd been best friend's for years and in that time Blue's shown countless times how much she loves her. In the small ways, in the ways that matter.
So, she was willing to admit that she loved Blue in return. Maybe she was a lesbian after all, and it was all Blue's fault.
Of course this made Blue happy. The constant in her life was to remain constant. In fact the only thing that would really change is who slept where and the fact that Kris would be calling Blue by her real name in private. Blue likes hearing it. Her own family was starting to use it. The name went with the person she was now, without those powers. However it was still something she didn't want to share with the outside world.
Life is on track. Things are good. She'd put her past behind her and was moving forward. There were plans in the making for Lyra House and for Bluehouse. Sometime soon they'd have an awesome place to live, too.
Yes.. life seemed perfect.
He Keeps Trying
Coming out of a store in Founder's Falls with her arms full of bags, Brian stops her- saying hi. He wants to still be friends. He apologizes. He even goes so far as to say that he'll think of things in a different way if it'll salvage their friendship. But even if she were to forgive him, Kris wouldn't. Tangent wouldn't take him back as a friend. He's gotten away with murder, even if it was the murder of a psycopath.
He wont' let their friendship fall apart.
How will he stop it from happening, she asks.
He's going to try. Plain and simple. She makes it clear that he'll have to make things right with Tangent and most importantly with Kris. If that doesn't happen then their friendship will never be mended.
She asks him not to try and see her again. He says "until he smooths things over with Tangent". And Kris. Most importantly he'd have to make this right with Kris and with Mike, when he comes home.
Before she goes she wonders if he has anything else to say. He asks how she is. Her answer?
"Other than the obvious.. I'm happy. I'm happier than I've been in the last twelve years."
He's happy she's happy and then he lets her go, determined to fix things. He'll get in contact with Kris and with Tangent. She reiterates that he shouldn't try and see her again until things are fixed, if ever.
"Until. They will be." Those are his words but her eyes show just how little she believes that it'll happen.
She Tells Deus
She found him on the pier. He noticed immediately that she wasn't the same. So she tells him about giving her abilities back.
He tells her that Mr. Zen told him not to go after Blue, not to search for her immediately. His conclusion is that by letting her suffer through that experience of rape and torture Mr. Zen assured that she'd be willing to return his power. Deus believes it's manipulation. Of him, Blue and Mike for one man's power.
Blue was surprised to hear what Mr. Zen said but she won't believe the man who's like family to her family would do that. He'll talk to Zen Kajii about it. That should set things right.
Moving on in the conversation he wants to make sure she stays a hero, still helps people. Train. Complacency will weaken her. She promises to keep in shape. She doesn't know what she'll do, knowing just her claws are not enough to be a registered hero. He offers to teach her.
She'll think about it. For now there's too much going on. Mike's disappearance. Frisco's murder. The Twins escape. Baeroth's attack and her new relationship with Kris.
He told her about a murder he committed but also about the consequences he willingly accepted. Time in the Zig and working with Vanguard.
Before they went their own separate ways he made her promise to have a mage, she chose her Mom- the Archmage Jade Keller-, give her magical protection against the use of her blood by Baeroth to harm her.
Restructuring Houses, Inc.
Bluehouse had survived for years in the Isles. However during it's entire existence it had been plagued by the criminal elements that would try to oust it, remove it, or destroy it. Krane had tried. Phipps had tried. Arachnos had tried. So far they'd been unable to completely obliterate the good work that Blue had tried to accomplish. However, now that Blue was different, things with Bluehouse needed to be different.
Thinking a bit more clearly than she ever had before she was able, through some brainstorming with Kris and a few others, to come upon a solution.
It would be moved to Paragon City. Hopefully, with some help from outside sources, she could pull those women completely out of the Isles.
The reasons for this were plentiful:
They'd be safe. They'd be closer to Medical Care. They'd have access to the Universities. They'd find employment opportunities.
Of course there were more. Not the least of which was that this would keep Blue from having to traipse around the Rogue Isles in order to check on them. Without her abilities she'd be at a severe disadvantage and in danger. With the Twins having escaped from Zig custody she didn't dare risk setting foot over there.
After days of looking she found the perfect building. Two Stories. Southeast corner of Galaxy City. Constellation Row. Across from an entrance to Gemini Park.
That wasn't the only building she had been looking for either. With her friendship with Brian facing an uncertain future and for the same reasons above, she wouldn't build Lyra House in the Isles. She wanted it close to home.
It had to be accessible to the Steel Canyon Children's Hospital. It needed to be near the monorail, as well. Again she found what she was looking for. In the extreme north of Steel Canyon, just past the Tram, she found a three story building that would work. It had the fortunate bonus of being located next to a motel. This would help should there be spill over or family and friends who'd like to be nearby.
While she had the money from Don it wouldn't be near enough. Not after buying the warehouse where she and Kris would be living once it was ready. Zoe and Bobby had already said they'd help. She intended to talk to those in Tangent and see if they'd be willing to volunteer or help in anyway: whether it be in the remodeling, as staff, monetary or in any other way they might be consider.
Not to mention that once Bluehouse was over in Paragon there would be the necessity of a front in the Isles- using the old house. There would be women needing help getting out. Then those for Lyra House would have to be found as well and brought underground to the City.
It was a big project but once it was going and with the help of friends and family it would make a major difference in the lives of those it touched. She was utterly excited.
Now it was time to talk with Mr. Zen.
Normal maybe?
Blue was in the habit of visiting the Talos Island pier on Spanky's Boardwalk just about every day. Of course now the time it took to get there and back was different. No straight flights but instead taxi's and long walks. But it was quiet there. She'd found it a refuge while struggling with the power inside her. Now that she no longer had that power pressing from within she went there to rejoice in her newfound serenity. It was a good meeting spot as well.
However today there was a stranger standing there. Not in her spot but she startled him enough by stepping quietly over and telling him it was. Max, as he introduced himself, was willing to leave but she assured him he could stay. Why say no to a possible new friend.
Their conversation ranged from her loss of abilities to his bitterness. All in all it was a good rounded conversation. She told him about being a mindwalker, about what she'd done in the past with it. His own moral code kept him from erasing memories but he'd done some similar things. Unlike her, though, he wouldn't want to be without them. The thought that he'd be unable to help someone if they needed it would be too much.
She was in the middle of explaining that she helped in different ways, and that she still had her claws, when Rikti attacked. This was the first time that her lack of abilities came into play. A drone got in a lucky shot- wounding her shoulder. Max reacted quickly, able to render Blue invisible at least for a little bit of time and mind controlling the Rikti so that they fought each other. Blue did her best, using her claws to assist in taking down the alien invaders. Once the battle was over Max healed her bruises and the shoulder wound.
Not long after that Zoe showed up. Blue had lost track of time. They were supposed to have met for some shopping- the intent to get Blue some "business" clothes and accessories such as a briefcase. Her cousin wasn't happy to hear that Blue was caught in a Rikti attack and unable to really defend herself. Blue promised that if she didn't have others around she would have run. This doesn't make Blue happy. She wants to help. Soon she'll have to think of how.
Saying goodbye and nice to meet you, they were given a parting gift. Brownies Max had made. Zoe didn't take hers-- she doesn't eat much and she's having a night with her fiance. Blue, on the other hand, accepted and enjoyed it.
Hello Mechanic
It was the first time Blue went to the D after giving up her powers. In the Rikti Monkey Fight Club she got caught up in a conversation with Scott. A mechanic with a shop in both Paragon and the Isles they talked a little about this and a little about that. She mentioned her Safehouse in the Isles and they exchanged cards. If he knew of any women needing help she'd like him to send them her way. Eventually Kris showed up. When she found out Blue had brought up her work and trusted the man from the getgo she wasn't too happy. Of course the fact that Scott has a dark spirit inside him didn't help. To be fair, Blue didn't know that when she brought it up. She didn't take the card back. Besides, she has his card and he lives over the shop. She knows where to find him.
Scott got quiet after both Blue and Kris made it clear they thought the spirit in him was a -bad- thing. Luckily someone else came up to the bar. Kate. A woman from Praetoria she easily slipped into the conversation while Scott skipped out. They talked for a little bit more- Blue stepping away to do battle with the toilet monster at one point- and they were joined by a man in a robotic suit named Two (Or Laburn).
Scott returned at some point, as well. They talked about relationships and Blue said she was taken. Kay asked who the fellow was or if it was Kris. Kris gave Blue a panicked look so Blue merely said, "Something like that." Sure.. it pretty much says it but she did add that it was personal and they should leave it at that. So those with them did. Though Kris got uncomfortable- still not sure of how to act or feel publicly about being in a non-heterosexual relationship. She went to leave but Blue convinced her to stay.
Finally it came out that Brian is Laburn's younger brother. Needless to say he heard about how Brian had made it to their shitlist. That turned the conversation sour and Blue quickly decided she was through with the D for the night. Kris offered to give her a ride back to the warehouse on her hog. Blue was glad for that. She loves riding behind her!
So the two left. But not before Blue's past was mentioned without specifics. She told Kay to Google her and the woman said she would and would have questions for later. Blue's fine with that. She's not shy!
He's HOME!
It was near four in the morning when someone woke Blue up from a deep sleep. At first she thought it was Kris- seeing as it was the bedroom they share in the Warehouse they live in. But after hearing a terrible impression of the southern woman she wiped the sleep from her eyes and discovered that it wasn't her lover and best friend but her brother!
He was home and he spent a little bit filling her in on the basics- with the promise of more details later. This made Blue's night. They have a lot to talk about.
The List Grows
While at the University arranging some meetings regarding Bluehouse she was offered help in finding some literature in the library. She talked to the man for a little bit and found out that she'd heard his name before. He was none other than James Broderick- her mother's ex boyfriend from years before. They talked for a little bit regarding his depression and catching him up on the Keller family. Blue also mentioned Tangent and her place in it.
Later on, a different day, she waited for him outside the University. She wanted to check up on him and she'd been there anyway. He told her he had expressed interest in Tangent- and had put in an application. They talked for a few minutes- she commenting that he looked and seemed much better than before.
She wasn't surprised to see him show up on the STation in Newton's Bar & Grill where quite a few crew members had gathered. Well.. crew and Deus. Syl, Ms. Metropolis, Luci, and Mike were there. Mr. Zen showed up a bit after everyone had wondered off and Blue made sure to leave him and Deus alone to talk out what they needed to talk out. While they did that she talked on the comm to Anh for a few minutes and wandered around the Station playfully arguing with Martin.
Eventually she came back after Mr. Zen was gone and talked for a few more minutes with Deus. He offered, once again, to train her. She's thinking it over and will be talking to Kris about it.
Then next day Blue was in the D and Luci joined her, followed by Kris. They enjoyed some conversation about clothing- apparently Blue needs some Variety!- amid other things until Zan'Zan showed up. He'd been observing people and in one situation let a child get "eaten" without interfering. Making him understand he SHOULD have was very complicated and the fact that it even needed explaining frustrated the three women.
After a pitstop at the bathroom, Blue came back to find James with the two women and Zan long gone. The four of them choose to go up to the Station where it was quieter. Once there it was Blue and Luci who did most of the talking. Once Blue tried to tease Kris but it fell flat- referring a little too closely to their relationship for Kris's comfort. All Blue could do was say nevermind and let it go while Kris ran off to do something, obviously uncomfortable. It hurts Blue to have to keep things to herself, it's limiting and not her. She's proud of the woman who's her lover and best friend but she's respecting Kris so... until then it's all hush hush and private.
Times at the D
Blue has been spending quite a bit more time in the D. Going there late one night she hung out against the railing of the top heroside bar. While there she met Seth who turned out to be a pretty cool guy. Eventually Xeno showed up as well and Blue took the opportunity to apologize for what she'd done, or tried to do, to him. He accepted it and they all chatted. Metro passed by a few times but didn't seem to hear when Blue called out ther her. One of Xeno's friends showed up, a woman named Vella, and it wasn't until Brian appeared that Blue decided it was time to call it a night. She was headed down the stairs and stopped, taking the time to pass Seth her card. She'd suggested he look into joining Tangent, as well. Metro finally spotted Blue and they exchanged hellos. Brian even came near and offered a hello and a wave but he turned away and left, much to Blue's relief. She's still not sure how to deal with him. The loss of her friendship with him still stings. But her new life has no place in it for it.
The next day she gathered with Luci, Deus and a man named Sebastian. The topics were varied. Xeno stopped by and while he was there they talked about tattoos. Blue's considering getting one. Xeno brought up that he has one but because he was on call he didn't show it. Blue's told him she expects him to let her peek at it sometime in the future. A man named Jamal, from Praetoria, showed up but he left quick enough when they started asking him to defend his opinions. Not long after that Sebastian left as well and Kris showed up. The conversation turned to Deus's soul, becoming the focus. Blue's always said that Deus has one. He is adamant that he doesn't. Kris is of the opinion that he has to have one somewhere since he has free will and if so then they should get it back. All there women- Kris, Blue and Luci- were willing. Deus, on the other hand, was completely against it as it might wake his makers. The figured it was worth the risk but he doesn't want to jeopardize their lives. They also spent a few minutes where Blue made it clear that Deus should hook up with Tangent, that there wasn't any reason for him NOT to since he'd been an honorary member for a long time.
A few days later she was back there in the D, sitting off to the side when a woman showed up. She introduced herself as Miyako, Luci's wife. The pair talked for a little bit, mostly about the need to relax and not to lose yourself in your work. Tabor showed up and joined the conversation- calling Blue by the nickname of Bluebird. She thought it was cute. Blue teased him about being in uniform but he was of the opinion that it kept his identity a secret, that that might be necessary in a place like the D. Blue doesn't agree with hiding who you are but he shut her up a bit and got the topic changed when he brought up that Pain, Agatha Black, had threatened those he loved and any defense against her gaining knowledge of him was good. A few minutes later Mike showed up. He and Blue exchanged their nicknames- Otherme- which put a smile on Blue's face. Miyako left and those that were left talked about a conference Tabor would be attending- one concerning letting the Rikti establish a colony on Primal Earth. Blue hates the idea- hating the Rikti- and made that plain. Mike didn't like the idea either but he didn't stay to chat very long, having stopped in only in passing through to Founder's Falls where he was needed.
After he left Blue mentioned that the truck floating outside of the D belonged to her Uncle. When she didn't know all the details regarding the man's disappearance and the search and more she explained that she hadn't joined the family until that past August. Tabor hadn't known that and he asked if it was the Mars family. She chuckled and said.. no.. it was the Keller family. He asked if that included a Vagary Keller. Blue said, yes, that was her sister though she was adopted. As Blue was leaving she told Tabor she'd explain the complicated nature of her family to him sometime. He smiled and commented that he'd bring the headache medication.
On yet another Day she found herself in the D again. This time she saw Brian but didn't run off. She left him to do his thing. She relaxed, sitting on a railing and leaning against a column. She merely enjoyed the music until a random passerby by the name of Dr. Poe chose to stop and talk. He was looking for someone but didn't know who that person was. In the middle of their conversation Seth showed up again. Blue and he chatted for a bit, Dr. Poe keeping mostly to himself, until somehow the conversation turned negative. Dr. Poe was looking for a hero to kill. A particular hero who's name he couldn't remember. Vengeance. Both Blue and Seth didn't like that idea. Luckily Blue made sure to keep her mouth shut about Bluehouse, Lyra House and their soon to be underground railroad. With their discomfort and disapproval obvious Dr. Poe left, stating that he hoped they never met outside the D. When he was gone she promised Seth that she would look into having Mike get back to him about joining up. He asked if there was someone for him to get in touch with but Blue misunderstood and told him no. He left shortly after that to get some rest.
What do you think of this position?
The confusion didn't become apparent until later, she was talking to Mike on the comm. There was no application from Seth. She'd gotten mixed up and she's have to set that right, making sure he put in an app as soon as possible, even if it was just an letter of interest. Mike took the opportunity to not only suggest that she be in charge of Recruitment. Blue was aghast. After she'd already messed up? Yes, he said and so now he's given her a job. Recruiting. She's going to pay him back for that and he knows it, though he knows there's nothing to fear from her... not really. In hindsight she's glad to have something to do, something she's good at and people... people she's good with. This is right up her alley and she's glad her brother is willing to trust her in that position.
Can I?
Beta surprised her at the D. Not a bad thing seeing as she likes the guy. But what he said shocked her and made her just a tad bit angry. He'd been to see Kris and had asked if he could watch them in bed. He wanted to learn, he said, what was different about this relationship in regard to Blue. He could tell this wasn't like the other sexual relationships she'd had- and he'd seen them all. Blue could believe he'd done it but wasn't happy that he'd asked. She also wasn't happy that he asked in lupine form- a shifted form he'd taken to help justify his name. Kris has cybernetic legs, the real ones having been ripped off by a wolven man who'd tried to rape her and didn't like that she'd fought back. One asking to watch her and her lover would certainly have put the southern woman on the offensive. Beta had assumed, based on comments made in passing that were not to be taken literal as well as on some personal knowledge of Kris's accomplishments in the field of robotics, that the woman A) was robosexual and B) that she was glad her legs had been ripped off. Blue tried to explain to no avail. He chose to ask BLUE if she would approve of him watching. This frustrated her. No. She wouldn't. Where before she might have, years ago she would have been excited for it even, she was different now. Of course that's what he wants to study. Eventually it came down to: If Kris wanted it she would allow it but Blue herself would rather Kris never want that. Of course this derailed his next request which was to join in. Obviously.. the same answer was given.
Blue asked if Beta was doing the same thing with Mike and he said he was. Not good. He'd been watching through their windows! She suggested he tell Mike what he was doing and that Mike would make him stop once he did. When Beta mentioned he'd developed an attachment to Lexi because of the closeness they'd shared when she'd sought comfort during Mike's absence Blue couldn't help but be worried. Beta said he'd do his studying and observations without intruding and Blue's worried what that might mean. She made it clear that he better not screw up what she has with Kris, it was hard enough to deal with the mechanic refusing to act like they were a couple while in public. A few minutes later he ran off. Blue finished chatting on the comm with Luci and then headed home. She had some things to talk to Kris about, that's for sure.
When she did get home to discuss it Kris played a joke on her. Asking her to grab a wrench and to hold it in the engine to do something it turned out that it was really nothing. Funny and adorable. When Blue mentioned Beta it turned the conversation a bit sour. Beta showing up in wolf form had freaked her out and his request had pissed her off. All Blue could do was apologize and offer what comfort and support she could, telling her how much she loved her. This led Kris into sharing something important.
If she loved Blue then she shouldn't be hiding it, caring more about her reputation and self than about the relationship. Kris was ready to make their relationship visible. Holding hands, standing next to each other and maybe sharing a kiss in public. Most of all Blue could now refer to her relationship, she could tell people how much she loved the Southern woman. The moment she realized what that meant she couldn't help but feel her heart clench and tears come to her eyes. It was then she knew just how much having to keep the secret had hurt. But she'd been patient and respectful of the other woman's feelings and it'd paid off.
Yes the D again!
She had a conversation on the city comm with Seth. Explaining he should file an application with Tangent and then Mike would get back to her. She told him of her new position which she thanked him for his part in getting her. Beyond that she actually spent quite a bit of time talking with Xeno again. He showed her his tattoos which had a similar design to her Mom's embedded jadestone. They talked about him finishing his and turning them into something connectible to his suit. Xeno made her some drinks and they eventually moved the talk to Zarp and then to her abilities or lack of them. She mentioned Keene and Lyra and then talk went to where they were from. His family is normal. Average people with a rich history. Blue found it interesting. Her own family is far from normal-- full of all sorts of oddness. She switched to Root Beer after a few other drinks. She's not sure how alcohol will affect her now. Though the fact that there are no mental powers to go haywire if she's drunk makes the attempt tempting. Though she'd most likely just want Kris around for that. Definitely not Mike!
Eventually someone joined them at Isaac's bar. Alex Schlotz was his name. An Archmage who likes to spout of information. They talked about stories they might have, Praetoria and then moved on to whether Alex knew Nigel Kaine, Jade Keller or Kai Keller. He said he'd purchased some wand cores at Nigel's shop. He's heard of Jade somewhere and he knows Kai- thinking the Professor has some interesting theories. He mentioned the Enchiridion which supposedly Blue now has access to when looking at a terminal- she can find those she might get the best help from for a mission. Something he cast on her is supposed to provide that ability. Soon after that he left and then she did too, heading home for dinner.
Paralaxis was the next crew member she met at the D. They talked about Tangent and she mentioned her new position. Then they moved on to abilities and the lack of them as well as to what he does. Fix and build things. A tech man. She suggested that he'd have a lot to talk about with Kris. They talked about the fact that he's a soldier and what the world he'd come from was like. It angered her to find out his government had killed any "freaks" after their war. Anyone who wasn't human, who showed signs of abilities or powers, was killed. Considering the fact that Blue's not completely human-- but one that's slightly altered by the Iradu-- her reaction was understandable. Not to mention that despite what evil some abilities can be used for sometimes those who've wielded the evil can be redeemed. She sees herself as working towards that end herself.
She Explains to Zarp
Blue was sitting by the water in Atlas when a familiar voice startled her. Zarp. He'd returned. He'd returned and he knew their marriage was over. He had the paperwork. She did her best to explain and he understood. He'd always understood her just like she'd always seen through his masks.
He was a vagabond and couldn't promise he'd stay around. It wasn't fair to her- he wasn't the right person for her to be with. When she told him that she was with Kris now he approved. And he wants to see Kris too, part of closure. She suggested, after he said he'd be leaving Invictus, that she join up with Tangent. He flatly refused. She was disappointed but understood.
They'll talk sometimes. She'll call. They might meet in the D. But things aren't the same. Keeping his hands off her will be hard. He still loves her. In fact he said it again in his own language when they separated after a long hug. She has missed him and she won't be selfish enough to expect him to be around her if he feels uncomfortable. Blue just wants their friendship to continue as best it can. So they're going to try.
Since
She's spent plenty of time at the D and some at the Station. The idea of getting a tattoo she told Kris about and instead of using magical ink Blue's lover began designing nanite tattoo, even agreeing to getting one herself. Blue's wanting moving gears up the back and then down the front. Xeno, who needs something similar has offered to be the guinea pig and have Kris do the tech on him first.
Zarp and Blue talked- and he offered to train her. Kris joined them and there was a deep discussion between her and Zarp while Blue was quiet in the background.
She spent over an hour in the D talking to a man named Lashiir. They had completely differing opinions on Recluse and the Isles. She has a passion for saving people from there. Hence Bluehouse and Lyra House. But he was of the opinion that the ARbiters were the best enforcement the world could have.
A friend she hadn't seen in years found her in the D. Nikolai. A man full of teasing from the Isles she was glad to see him. He's one of the few people left from her past. Unfortunately he works for Arachnos. A necromancer he deals with the dead. That offered some great fodder for teasing. Especially by Kris and Blue. Blue's going to talk with the PPD and see if there are any warrants out for him, anything keeping him from being allowed in Paragon. She wants her friends to be beside her. Losing them to their lives as murderers is something she doesn't want to go through. Not after Brian. When Nikolai called her from within Paragon she was a bit upset that he hadn't visited the PPD or waited for her to help pave the way. She wants to make sure she goes with him but if they arrest him she can't stop it.
To Train or not to Train
She's thought about it a lot. A whole hell of a lot. Eventually she made up her mind. After a talk with Kris she realized that she's happy. She has a position with Tangent. She has the busyness of her projects and her new relationship. For now she's not going to do any training. With anyone.
It's not the Same
The last time she hung out in the D with Zarp, Xeno and Max things were going good but into the night as the crowd began to gather, Blue became a bit uncomfortable. Without her psionic abilities she only has her in her mind. So used to the D as it was when she was there so often in the past- with voices and thoughts this lack is disturbing. Not to mention that the urges that were there- leading to the majority of the teasing- are gone, too. So large crowds and big groups... they make her a bit uncomfortable now.
Not Who She Was
Blue told Zarp she didn't plan to train with anyone and while he accepted that she was different she could tell he didn't like her answer. He's right. She's not who she was before. It's only a small part of her that wants to be on the frontline of defense of those she loves and cares about. Now she recognizes she'd got a different role to play. She trusts her family and friends to protect her and everyone else. Not that she won't do her best to kick the ass of anyone who'd try to hurt them just that she knows she doesn't have to do it alone or be prepared to do it.
Making a Difference?
Blue met a young man on the pier. Stheras. Something had happened to him and his appearance showed it. He looked like a snake. Not that it bothered her and she told him that. But he was self-conscious and defensive. Her words were blunt and matter of fact but he responded decently well. She gave him her card with the expectation he'll call her. There might be a place for him at Tangent but she didn't push that. Nonchalantly she also told him there could be a job for him at Lyra House if he wanted time for Registered hero work in his life. Now just to see where that goes.
Go Figure
The gathering had dwindled by the time Blue showed up. Ice cream on the boardwalk. When it was said and done there was only Zarp and Luci left. That conversation, however, was interrupted by an unknown man looking for someone. Walker. He tried to intimidate Blue but it didn't work. She's used to people invading her space. Someone's got to tell Solguard that there's a man wanting him dead.
She ran into Lashir again and this time when she left she was on edge. Kris calmed her, showing up in the D not long after the conversation. His support of Arachnos frustrates and angers her on a level she had never felt before. It didn't help that Vicky sided with him. With her being a part of Tangent and Blue unable to do anything about that she felt lost.
At one point she spent some time with Nelo, who comforted her in her confusion and frustration. Besides the issues with those in the Isles found in the D she found the most frustration and sadness in the change between her and Zarp. She's different than she used to be however he can't seem to grasp it- to understand what drives her now. No matter how she explains it he just can't. He says he's satisfied with her being happy but that wedge hurts.
Luckily she did find one new person at the D she could talk to. A man new in town, with a sword strapped to his back that most don't notice, found her in thought. They talked and she found the simple conversation enjoyable. The only confusion was when, after telling her his name was Walter, he corrected her and said he was called Daniel. When they spoke again he responded to Daniel and she chose not to bring it up.
Permanent Separation
Standing on the pier in Talos Blue stared out at the water. Hands gripped the railing, her claws digging deep pits into weather worn wood. Her body shook, the air filled with a growling whimper.
Jade had come to see Blue, bringing with her the news. They'd both cried. Hugging tightly to each other, motherly affection abounded. After she'd gone Blue had needed time alone so she'd come here.
Her brother. Her other half. He'd gone without her. He'd had to go, she knew that. But it tore at her. She'd known him, known who he was, for such a short time. So close and now... so far away.
Already she missed him, feeling that fresh raw emptiness of his loss eating at her heart.
One of her best friends, his fiance, had gone with him. And the baby. Her niece or nephew she'd never meet. No longer the person she was she'd been looking forward to being a part of it's life.
Lowering her head, eyes closing, she cried. The sound coming from deep within her, the leftovers from her time as a Felix, continued.
She'd get past this, she always did. But the wound was deep. Without her abilities it hit even harder- all things felt with no outlet and no rage to burn it away. If there was any time she considered asking for that primordial power back it was now.
But no. Mike wanted this for her. A new life wrapped in the arms of family and friends while being true to who and what she was.
It made her laugh to think of that grin of his, that boyish shyness she loved to tease. Wherever he was he'd find more friends and he'd make his own family.
“You won't forget me. I know that. Tell the baby good things, who I became and not what I was,” she spoke into the breeze.
They were tied closer than any two people could be and though she could no longer feel or sense him- having given that ability away too- she knew with all certainty that nothing could separate them completely.
“I'll be who you want me to be, Otherme. I'll take care of them and do good things. They'll be okay. I'll be okay.”
Stepping away from the railing she took a long deep breath.
“It's not goodbye. It never will be.” That said she turned and walked away, wiping at the tears that wouldn't stop flowing. She'd continue to talk to him and often even if he couldn't hear her.
In the early morning of Monday May 16th, 2011 Tangent Station was brought down. Everyone evacuated safely to Paragon through the teleporters. That is, everyone except Mike and his pregnant fiance Lexi Lucas. While they didn't perish they had a fate that too some could be considered almost as bad. Portal Corp technology- experimental- was used to whisk them away to safety. But not here. Instead it sent them to another dimensions Earth. It was a one way trip and no one, save Mr. Zen, had been able to say goodbye. If she'd had her powers she could have spoken over the psionic communication device Kris had helped develop. As it was she wasn't there when it happened, instead being informed nearly half an hour later by their Mom Jade Keller.
This coupled with some changes to Kris's life- namely retiring from hero work to focus on her other skills put to work for defense on the many battlefield's where war rages on Primal Earth- has brought about a deeper change to the woman known as Blue. The D holds no place for her. Her visits there will be no more. Instead she has her projects. Bluehouse. Lyra House. Her other houses around the world and the many more she can put into place given time and heart. Together with Kris, using more of the southern woman's genius work, they have the beginnings of a way to bring across those from the Isles that need their help. A bit more safely. A bit more securely and a bit more secretively.
Not only that but with her brother gone she has a responsibility to her family. Specifically to her younger sister, Vagary. They need her and ultimately she needs them.
Life will continue on... love will grow... things will be good again and Blue will embrace every bit of it.
Unlike Another, He Understands
She called Nelo. She needed to see him, to talk with someone outside of her girl and family about what had happened with Mike and the decisions she'd made. He met her on the pier in Talos and listened. When things were said and done he ripped the name patch off his vest and offered it to her. She took it gladly. He also told her his real name. She only gave him the name Blue. Her real name reserved and protected still. He understood. That's who she is to him and always will be. He understood. This meant a lot, meant everything. Zarp can't understand her life, her choices. Nelo does. They hugged tightly and it felt like goodbye. Blue made it clear they were still friends, that they could call and meet in Paragon since the D was no longer an option for her. However it seemed hollow, their lives going in different directions. She'd ask her mom to pray for him. He's one of her oldest friends and he's always been there for her. It's the least she can do other than never forget.
Tragedy for Bluehouse
Things were going well. Very well. Blue and Kris had no problems keeping busy, their lives full of work, family and each other. New business ventures- such as Blue's new cooking show and it's extension to a line of food products that began with candy and delved heavily into baked goods created in the kitchen by the women together. Blue's clothing line was still in its infant stages as was the artwork she has plans to exhibit at a gallery in New York and a gallery in London.
Lyra House had been completed. In fact it was thriving. Working with a network of individuals many families had been able to escape the Isles and receive the care and help they needed to begin a new life.
Bluehouse, also working with that same network, had fit in perfectly with the community in Galaxy City.
All was going well.
Then the storm. Hell rained from the sky in the form of shivan meteors. The city where Bluehouse had found a home was almost completely destroyed and nearly everyone was killed.
Blue and Kris weren't at Bluehouse when it happened. But there were plenty of others who were. Of the three staff and nine girls in residence only two survived. Only one of those was a young lady brought out of the muck and mire of life. The other was a middle aged man, a teacher, who had just arrived with the purpose of teaching a creative writing course. Two lived long enough to die at the hospital.
Heroes rushed in and saved those they could. No one could have predicted the attack or the devastation that would be suffered. Blue, no longer a hero, could only do the menial of tasks though no less important. Water, blankets, comforting squeeze of the hand. All those things were necessary. Family and friends came as quick as they could, even those retired from the limelight. When all was said and done life was not the same and never could be.
Living would continue, though. Bluehouse will be rebuilt once a suitable place is found. Those who were lost will always be remembered, each one to be given recognition in the new house.
Without those close to her Blue would not have been strong enough, not without her powers. Yet the depths of her determination have yet to be reached. Moreso than before there's a will to make things better. There have been times since the attack when she's considered asking for her powers back. In fact she's spoken with those close to her about doing that every thing. So far she's kept herself from doing it.
Things to know
The above certainly can't cover all you could know about this woman. There's far more to it. Maybe these tidbits of information will help.
Facts
Blue is not her real name. Of those in the Isles or Paragon, only five people knew both her first and last name. A part of her regrets telling Don Giordano and Zarp, men she thought she loved. In the future it's not likely she'll tell anyone other than her family.
OOC Fact #1: If there was a movie made, I had originally decided Blue would be played by Ashley Judd. Then I leaned towards Stana Katic from Castle. It's also interesting that at different times by different people Nathon Fillion's role on Castle has been likened to Zarp Draken- the man Blue married. Now however I think I've found someone who could do Blue justice: Jennifer Carpenter. Though her chest is a little lacking, where Blue's isn't, her character portrayal of Deb in Dexter puts her as the front runner. Her face, I realized later, looks like Emily Deschanel who plays Dr. Brennan on Bones.
OOC Fact #2: This page is currently the SECOND longest page on Virtueverse and is NOT a just a grouping of stories and logs.
If only one song could be her theme it would be: "Weight of the World" by Evanescence
Blue can cook, dance and use sign language. All of them with very good proficiency.
She's been trained by various artists. Portraits, painting, sketching. By no means is she a creative genius but there are a few things that she has a talent for.
Since she's not ashamed of her body, Blue has been known to bartend in the nude. Swimming and lounging in the water is also fair game for nudity.
Though Blue has a broad range in sexual experiences she has avoided the most extreme of fetishes. If asked she will not be shy in explaining anything from her past in regard to her previous career.
If information is looked for in regard to Winsome Blue on the internet, there'll be plenty. A few fans of her work, previous clients and even one dear friend she's threatened (Friendly threats? Maybe.) have put up a fansite.
Unless swimming or hunting Blue can usually be found wearing a black (though sometimes blue) bandana on her head. Though when she dances she has a habit of pulling it off. Could be because there've been more than a few who've commented they like her hair down.
As a gift, she gave Ryu a necklace with an enchanted stone on it. Kept close to his skin it will bring her to him if ever he is in dire need of her help.
She once had her food poisoned with a narcotic by a man who is now one of her friends. That did not turn out well.
She loves simple pleasures and is easily amused.
Before giving up her abilities she found she could manage slight manipulation of water via her telekinesis. She also used to make her points by lifting and holding people in the air the same way.
Now that it has come to light who her birth parents are she now falls into membership in The Keller "Clan".
Favorites: Dancing! Snickers bars, Blue Bahama Mamas, the sound of the ocean, bacon, white carnations and swimming.
More Favorites- Color: Blue with yellow RIGHT behind it. Metal: Silver. Animal: Feline. Historical Figure: William Wallace. God: Terpsichore
Abilities-- ala game mechanics
UPDATE: Due to the turn her RP's taken she no longer has any of the abilities attributed to her powersets. She is merely human save her claws. At one time I played a VEAT version of her just so I could RP her claws. However that character has been deleted.
She was made as a Grav/Psi Dominator.
The Grav was telekinesis with a little bit of slipping into minds to have the person's body do what she wants it to do. Hence, tossing them around and holding them still or up in the air.
Ah... propel. The power that takes FOREVER to go off. This was NOT her throwing objects. And I even had that in her bio. It was mental energy she was sending at someone. A blast that's seen by those around her because it's just that powerful. Yet the minds of those she's with couldn't grasp JUST what she's doing visually so their minds compensate... giving it an image they CAN handle. That's why everyone saw something different. *grins* Gotta love that explanation!
Her Singularity was merely a manifestation of her powers. I usually didn't refer to it, just acting as if it was an extension of her.
She has the Dark Mastery Patron Pool from Ghost Widow. She was, in no uncertain terms, a follower of Ghost Widow or any such member of Recluse's band of evil incarnate. In RP I ignored that the Fortunata Seer was there for the most part. Occasionally, just for fun, I would call it a friend stopping by to help- an undercover Fortunata named Amelia. The dark Embrace wasn't RP'd as anything.
Psionic Assault secondary? Well just what do you THINK I RP'd that as?
Jewelry
She wears a lot of it.
Five earrings, three on the top and two on the bottom in her right ear. Two on the bottom of her left ear. In her navel there hangs a silver fish charm. This she wears as a testament to her friendship with Prosper. The importance of the fish relates to a memory the two of them share. Around her left ankle there is a small onyx wolf's head on a leather cord with a mithril casing. This was a gift from Sully and matches one which is worn by X. It has the special property of allowing all three to communicate telepathically. Though Blue can easily send mental messages to anyone she still never takes it off as they need it to send to her. Four things have been added to that leather cord: 1. Cel gave her a small circlet of blue stone with the word TRUST written on the back (which she removed from a silver chain) 2. Irandi gave her a yingyang of an Ivory Tiger and Onyx Dragon for her birthday, 3. Roe gave her a silver bullet (also removed from a silver chain) that radiates a faint magical glow while also hosts a glow spell that can radiate ten feet if Blue wills it to. Also on her left ankle is a gold chain on which is a bright tear shaped ruby that remains warm to the touch at all times and is entwined in thin gold strands which wrap around it in a serpentine pattern connecting to the chain. On the gold, the words "Itov Ro" are engraved (A gift from Zarp on her 29th Birthday). On her right ankle she wears a braided Black Hills Gold anklet- a gift from Kris for her twenty-ninth birthday. On her left index finger she's wearing a plain steel blue ring. When it's warmed by an increase in her body temperature the ring will show draconic runes that she's been told say: Wux Aritov. - It was a birthday gift from Zarp. On her left wrist she wears a silver bracelet with gold filigree which has a sapphire on it. The bracelet was a gift from Deus for her birthday.
Past Jewelry: 1) A bracelet made from the blade of Cel's broken sword. It has etched on it a dragon with angel wings. It glows and offers warmth if either of them is thinking of the other (The pair are kept in a chest at her home).
2) A silver and black pendent with a green gem embedded in it. On the back was the crest found on the flags at the Giordano Restaurant. It was a gift from Don and use to belong to his grandmother.
3) A diamond engagement ring. (When they broke up she left the necklace and the engagement ring in a small box for Don in his room with a small piece of paper that read- Ti Amo).
4) A gold bracer (Think Wonder Woman). It was a gift from an unknown person for her twenty-ninth birthday. The last person to have it was Deus Ex who removed it from her wrist after a team had to subdue her. It was, they had discovered, the reason for her trip into madness that led to her kidnapping and torture. The giver knew of Blue's parentage.
5) A silver chain from which hangs an hourglass shaped amulet encased in crystal with a glowing light in it. This was a gift from Brian and when opened the glowing light will find him and tell where the person who opened it is located. Yanked off her neck by her own hand it was dropped to the roof of a building in the Rikti War Zone. She flew off, leaving it behind.
The Arena
Fighting in the arena is something Blue use to be too scared to do. She was afraid to go all out and use all of her mental power. It took some convincing but she eventually got over the fear, trusting in DJ Zero's dampening field.
She's had the following fights:
1) Fight one was against Nelo to prove who was the better, to see who would bend. Though she claimed victory and he submitted to her authority as his code of honor as a werewolf demanded, after watching the recorded fight it was obvious he let her win.
2) Fight number two was against Don Giordano. She failed miserably.
3) The third was against Ryu. This came out as six to two but Blue asked for a rematch since she held back for the first few minutes of the battle. He agreed. He's also agreed to take on both Don and Blue at the same time. Obviously with the change in her relationship to the Giordano family that never happened.
4) She fought Nikolai. She's yet to see what he claims as his prize for kicking her ass.
5) Zarp fought her, on her assistance, and she discovered that he's pretty much immune to her attacks. His mental blocks are extreme. The fight with him was one of her most frustrating yet most enjoyable.
6) Deus was a formidable fighter. She couldn't touch him and he too kicked her ass.
7) Brian took her down. Not long after her return from kidnapping and torture he mentioned fighting in the Arena. On impulse she agreed and declared, "Now". They did and she went all out, as far as the Arena would let her.. eventually slipping into I want to take him out mode. Needless to say she never took him down. Not even once.
People
To list all those she knows would take forever.
Organizations
In Paragon
Tangent: An interstellar space station headed by her twin brother, Mike, this group's focus began as a place for the extraterrestrial, interdimensional and the odd duck. A place for people who had lost their world, their culture, their life and purpose. Tangent offered all of that back in the spirit of friendship. Noble ideals head up this group of Peacekeepers. It eventually broadened its horizons and made its mark in Paragon City. Both Blue and Kris were members of this group. In fact Blue eventually became head of Recruitment. The Station was attacked and crashed- Mike and his fiance teleported to another dimension of earth along with a portion of the station. The organization was disbanded.
The Zenvious Foundation: A Paragon City family of heroes that she worked with and had ties to. It has since disbanded and disbursed. The Keller "Clan" was the core of this group.
The Invictus Foundation: Some former members of The Zenvious Foundation joined this group. Kris and Blue were counted among their number for a brief time. Tangent was also coalitioned with them for a short time. Eventually Blue, Kris and Tangent distanced themselves from Invictus.
In the Isles
The Silvermoon Pub and Inn: It burnt to the ground and those who once called it home moved on. She still cherishes its memory.
The Giordano Family: The mafia family run by her ex-fiance.
Rogue Entertainment: The adult entertainment studio she use to work for when she first came to the Isles.
Club Midnight Obscura: A club ran by her friend Nikolai. It has been years since she's been there or seen him.
In the Loop: A Restaurant and Bar she used to visit occasionally.
The Children of the Night: She's always found Vampires intriguing. She has had no contact with any of their members for a good while.
The Garage: Her best friend's shop and front for a Zenvious Foundation Initiative. It has since closed.
Say what you will!
She knows lots of people? Prove it!
- "Blue is....somethin' else. In a good way, of course. She can dance with me anytime, t'say th'least." -- Moonlit Rose
- "Blue is a fascinating woman. She has survived much and not lost heart. It pains me when she is hurt, and that is saying a good deal." -- Winterblood
- "She's a good person and I hope that as time goes on she sees me as half the sister I'm beginning to see her as." --Lexi Lucas
- "Madame Blue is self-effacing yet confident, intelligent, compassionate. Her work not only saves lives, but teaches those people to save themselves and others. A truer definition of 'hero' does not exist in my private cosmology." -- Deus Ex
- "Arrogant cunt. While I can hope that the bitch and her friends never existed at all, I will settle for making their lives hellish... I wonder if she has any kids?" -- Frisco Redbath
- "She glows. If you can see auras, you'll know what I mean. She seems so lonely sometimes though." -- Zoey Walkers
- "I can't think of any woman stronger, tougher, or more noble in her goals to help people than Blue. I admire her work and it's inspired me to do my own." -- Unit v4.0
- "She's a strong person. I have the feeling she'll make a large difference in the lives of many." Matthew Telis
- "She's really cool! She has a fire sword AND a shield and she's fun sometimes. She'll let me stay over and she watches movies with me. She's going to marry my big little brother and I don't know if that'll make her my big sister or my little sister!" -- Little Miss Vagary
- "Oh.. Blue? Shes... a beautiful person, and.. well. Hehe.. thats really about it." Ishaila Ti'nari
- "What can be said other than 'WOW'? She does everything and IS everything. In the words of my favorite poet: She loves to laugh, she loves to sing, she does everything. She loves to move, she loves to groove, she loves the lovin' things." -- Zarp Draken
- "I never got the chance to tell you how I really feel and now it's probably my biggest regret. You were my best friend. You helped me through times I probably wouldn't have been able to get through otherwise. And even when there was no one else, you were there. I loved you. But, it's too late for me to be anything more than just a memory to you now." --Jason
- "She's my daughter. She's beautiful of spirit even if she has a difficult time seeing it sometimes. I'm honored to be her mother." --Jade Keller
- "Blue's awesome. Especially when I wanna go shopping!" -- Zoe Fix
- "Bitch gave me crabs." David Davidson
